random reflections

today at the beach pavilion, there were these 2 cute and nice looking pigeons that kept walking in circles around us waiting for food, and occasionally went to other parts of the pavilion. the same kind which built a nest upon my aircon compressor cables in the past. later when i went to feed them, there were 2 mynahs hanging around them too. so i threw a potato chip near them, and a mynah quickly rushed to get it. i threw another a distance from all, a pigeon saw it first and slowly paced towards it, but the mynah again rushed past it and got the chip. but i didnt want the ugly mynahs to get the food. i wanted to feed the cute pigeons. so i threw a chip nearest to a pigeon, and this time it got to the chip first, but even then, the mynahs came and snatched the chip away, and the pigeon just backed off like it was scared, despite being bigger than the mynahs. so whenever a chip is left on the floor, the mynahs would always get it.

i found this rather interesting cause the pigeons were bigger and perhaps stronger. But it was just not in their nature to compete and fight with others, but instead to be gentle, graceful and merciful. though they may be stepped upon by the mynahs and lose some food, i see the desirable qualities in the pigeons and they win my admiration instead. then perhaps when i see pigeons next time, i would feed them, but not the mynahs. i think we can have something to learn from the pigeons, applied in human lives.

how would you feel if God were to use you as a tool to tell your good friend that a particular choice he made isnt the right one, by making you fail to do something that your friend entrusted you with which was important to his goal?
And whats worse, when looking at why it failed, it was all my fault. although unintentional. it really seems that God caused me to be that way. what other purpose could there be, but to prevent that plan from going through.... but why couldnt God do it Himself? why must i be made the scapegoat..?
well but if in the end we see for ourselves that that plan was not the right one for him after all, then i would be glad that i was used as an instrument of God's plan and 'rescue' from his own..