-random

i didnt know it could be so much fun shooting beetles. well one day this big brown beetle came flying into the house and landed on some hanging deco piece on the wall. then seeing the rubber band in front of me and the beetle in such a nice position, i took the rubber band and took a shot. aiya... missed, just by abit! but the gaming spirit had been stirred in me, so i took about 15 more from the kitchen started a free fire target practice session. though shooting from a range of less than 2m, even that beetle proved hard to hit. but when i did, it fell to the ground, and from then on it was more fun. everytime it was hit, it would give an obvious recoil as the band bounced off its rigid carapace, or if hit at the correct angle, would be knocked back like it was greater-bashed. with the ability to reuse the rubber bands and the target over and over again, i could just keep shooting till i shuang. but i stopped after while cos i was worried the beetle gets seriously injured. obviously i underestimated it. it clung onto my finger when i picked it up, and in reaction i flung it away, and it flew out. bye bye, target.

i got a job in church just this week, and would last just another 2 weeks, before i start sem 3 of poly. its almost like a full day, lasting 9 - 5. and the pay is rather miserable. but i took it cos its not money im looking for. in this job it has never been stressful, i can slack quite often while not being too bored, and the best part is that the tasks are different and varied each time, so im not being bored by monotony. plus i work in a familiar environment, under a familiar 'boss', laissez-faire style, and no colleagues to play office politics with. all these in return for less pay, is quite worth after all.


So far, a number of things have happened that further convinces me that God is real, very active, and will provide the best for me in return for faithfulness. When i asked God for something, i would sometimes get disappointed on the outcome. but when i think about it, i realise its actually an answered prayer, just not the way i wanted it. and if i think even deeper, i find that it might actually be better for me that way. But yeah, obedience and faithfulness to God's ways could be very difficult and strenuous, and depriving. yet with my own human thinking i can understand why that way would make my life on earth better, usually in the long run. obedience and self control is unseperatable.

Today's saturday papers have its first few pages dominated by articles on fat. and of course, the people who suffer from it. the very common body fat is found in everyone, yet for some it causes them suffering more than any disease. physically, theres all the health problems related to obesity, plus the difficulty of fitting into clothes, seats and narrow places. socially they face undeserved ridicule and embarrassment. and this leads to the emotional part about low self image and self esteem. this just makes life seem so unfair. they didnt choose to be like that. most of the time it is due to natural causes which contribute more rather than unhealthy habits. they were just born to be fat. and though we know its unfair to place all those social stigma on the fat ppl, its almost inevitable to think and behave that way. fat ppl can be really pitiful.

As for me, i have finally found the confidence to say - im thin! yeah i recently pinched myself all over to test for fats, and i realised theres hardly anything left! and i was actually delighted by that, at the same time very thankful to God for sparing me all the suffering of being fat and the wonderful ability to eat alot without growing fat - something that so many out there desire. well actually not really, cos i was fat before from overeating, but it seemed my metabolism increased as i got older. im so glad i got the metabolism and fat-production genes of my dad instead of my mom. but in today's society, despite ppl getting more and more obsessed with being slim, the number of overweight ppl r increasing. and i dont want so many ppl to be jealous of me. what to do? becoming fat myself wont be a good solution. so i just hope that everyone becomes slim instead. perhaps when i have alot of money, i would donate to some fat-aid organisation. haha. meanwhile i should learn not to judge or treat ppl difrently according to their weight.