Failed Fame

Last month, JTSS and GMSS held a combined lyrics writing competition for the school song of Clementi Woods Sec. From next year onwards, JTSS and GMSS merges to become CWSS. The task of composing the school song was given to their own students. Partly for fun, i did up some lyrics and sent it. i told myself; if i dont win, the winning lyrics must be quite good.

a week or so later, the results were out: i just missed it! - i got 2nd prize. I was happy, sad, disappointed and proud of myself at the same time. contradicting, yea. Happy and proud cos i was the 2nd best lyric writer out of the whole gmss and jtss. but, disappointed and sad for exactly the same reason! It just depends on how i look at it: either that im good at writing lyrics cos i obtained 2nd prize, or that i was so close to getting 1st, but missed it. what a waste. my thinking was more of the latter.

I was just 1 position away from obtaining the top prize, but that 1 position makes a world of difference. The 1st prize winner gets $100 vouchers, plus his lyrics will be sung by all CWSS students. That means a significant amount of fame for as long as CWSS exists! The 2nd prize gets close to nothing compared to the 1st - only $50 vouchers.

I looked at the winner's lyrics - it was good, but not much better than mine. some of mym frens said mine was better... maybe just to make me happy. i asked some of the teachers involved in evaluating the lyrics, and i found out i lost by a small margin. That made things worse! it worsened the feeling of wasted opportunity.

Its a rather depressing feeling to be so close yet so far. Like a song's lyrics goes: the winner takes it all; the loser standing small. I was not the loser, in fact im the runner up! but yet im already standing so small. anyway, though im saddened, i have no regrets cos i did my best. 2nd prize is still a good achievement. At least they gave me some $50 in vouchers to compensate for my broken ego. haha.

Apart from that topic, O lvls are dangerously near. tensions r rising while comfort falling. This is my last lap! 10 year's worth of education will be showcased within a week. May the LORD help me through this tough time. =)