Sdoru-ll-urodS!

Christmas Eve and Poison Tea

2011-12-24T16:22:00.003+08:00

Its christmas eve! the day before long-awaited christmas and spirits are high. So on the eve of eve, together with 3 friends, decided to chill at the poolside of my condo in romantic dim light. We played cards, brought vodka, chips and peach tea as mixer and for the one who would drive the rest home... all so fine and dandy.

One thing though, the peach tea i discovered was not sealed, and it was fizzy! someone must have added soda previously, i thought, and it didnt taste so bad. my 3 friends with fussy taste buds declined a second sip of the drink, and i being the good host drank it all for them.

I awoke early the next morning to a terrible stomachache. sitting on the throne, what happened next made me think for a moment that God changed my gender overnight! my intestines expanded and contracted furiously, not caring how torturous it felt, and everything solid or liquid i had taken in came out from both ends of my digestive system. what a feeling to start the day on Christmas eve!

The torment continued several hours, and fever set in. Only lying on my bed brought me partial relief. One thing that weighed most on my mind was the stack of unwritten christmas cards on my table, due to be given the day after. Nobody wants to be late for christmas! Yet i couldnt bring myself to write a word.

Now half the day is wasted, and i have skipped 2 caroling sessions to be at home. By a miracle, i could overcome my sickly state and finish my cards today. Nevertheless, nothing should ever spoil my festive holiday!

Back to Monotony

2011-12-16T01:25:00.002+08:00

Thus ends my 12 days of escape from the monotony of NS life, spent on a fabulous Mission Melaka trip and the JYM camp. I had awaited and anticipated it for many months before, and had loads of preaprations put into it, and now after what seemed like only a few days, its all over now. Why does time fly so fast when we are having fun? wish it could be the other way dont we...

This time had been such a blessed relief from the freedom-and-excitement-lacking NS life ive led the past whole year, and it sure is good to have a life temporarily back, with time spent meaningfully the whole 12 days. a large factor of it is due to always having a spiritual atmosphere, allowing much opportunity to experience God, as well as spending ample time together with my family in Christ.

Of course im glad i dont have to hang my head and brace for a whole long stretch of life drought just yet - there is still of course the festive season of Christmas! its still a time to loosen up and look forward to ... but after the new year comes, i shall prepare myself to quietly slip into limbo again.

As for now, its time to get a good rest. a good 6 hour nap sure well made up for the severe lack of sleep over the past few days. I was so tired i could ridiculously oversleep for 4 hours after my alarm rang, only to wake up at 10.30pm and realising i havent had my dinner or unpacked my bags. =.="
Thank God for stay-out before duty.

11/11/11 11:11

2011-11-11T11:21:00.001+08:00

A very special moment just passed today, a symphony of Ones that only comes once in this lifetime!
11/11/11 11:11!

So i know that this date has been overbooked way before for getting married, and understandably so. I too would look for a 'nice timing' to get married... so that i wont forget my anniversary!

It always gives me a little sense of delight whenever i randomly check my phone or digital watch and find that the time is 11:11. And for me, apart from looking nice, 11/11 is also a special day last year - it was the day i enlisted into the SAF!
So today on 11/11/11, i am an exactly one-year soldier, and more than halfway through my NSF!

I guess hardly anyone would make a celebration for this special time, and ppl are just going about their normal activities for the day, some pitiful ones stuck in lectures. As for me, i spend it on my favourite pasttime - on the computer, and enjoying a nice off day!

Tone down, Step up

2011-10-31T17:37:00.002+08:00

November has come! and im sure looking forward to it and beyond.
This marks the end of a hectic october, preceded by a crazy september pot-holed with guard duties. Last saturday was the very last guard duty that ill ever be doing! - until next june perhaps...

Now that the OSA outfield deployments have ended and everyone involved in it is happy, so am i; the unit crew who had to take care of everything in camp while they were gone. This november will be much breezier for 3 reasons - first, we are still admin flight; there aint no site duty. second, OSA is over, and lots of manpower is transfered back to unit. and third, its the deployment crews' turns to take the guard duties! eat that!

This un-busy period couldnt have come at a better time - the heat of mission trip and church camp preparations is sure catching up during this month, and i know i will be well occupied, yet not stretched, during this time. Now in case of weekday meetings, i could put into good use the several off days i have accumulated through those crazy weeks with weekend guard duties and no chance to have a rest day after.

This is a good chance for me to put myself to good use, and looking forward to making a difference. Thanks be to God for this opportunity.
Oh, and swing wide the doors of the brand new church@leedon!

First Attempt

2011-10-09T21:00:00.002+08:00

Its been a long september spent with every weekday in camp, = no breaks in between to go home. plus lots of guard duties, more than what ill be doing in the next 2 months. but finally its over. Hopefully will have more chances to blog too.

Last week was my first attempt at my TP driving practical test! And since there has not been any joyful exclaimations over facebook, twitter or whereeverelse, you could guess i failed.
3 immediate failures and 32 points, 20 of which came from striking kerb twice. all chalked up in the circuit. (driving on the road i got zero points. it could have been the tester going easy after the already demoralising score, or maybe i made no obvious mistake at all - i would say its possible.

2 main reasons i attribute to my failure -
first, i have never been into the BBDC circuit; all the while i had only used the private circuit which had all the stations, but the layout was totally different. i was in for a tough time in the unfamiliar environment on the test day itself! this unfamiliarity is partly the cause for my near-accident.
Secondly, ON THE TEST DAY ITSELF, my private instructor changed to a new car!! the new brakes and gears and steering wheel was stiff and i couldnt go by the feel i had before. the console was different. the car,too, was unfamiliar. Worst of all, the different dimensions of the car and the lack of a auto-wind-down side mirror caused the parking formulas i learned on the old car to be totally obsolete. i had to find out and get used to a new formula within the 2 hour lesson before the test - and by the end of it still none worked. hence another 2 immediate failures - from parking.

So now, i just gotta focus on getting my circuit stations right, figuring out how to work the new car, and visit the actual circuit again. and also to find a suitable new test date, probably 2+ months from now. Yes, i forgive my instructor.

2011-08-28T00:21:00.002+08:00

This is an excerpt taken from an article i just came across on a news website, talking about paranormal investigations at bedok reservoir:

"Haunted Singapore" conducted their investigation on 13 August (2011), which is also the 14th day of the Ghost Month.
Prior to their visit to the reservoir, people warned them that the particular day may be the most haunted and dangerous day of the year, or depending on how you see it, the best day for a paranormal investigation.

For those who may not realise, that particular day happens to be my 21st birthday! is that why some of my invites to my celebration suddenly backed out without a good reason..?
well, i had my celebration anyways. Nothing strange of that kind ever happened. not then, not any other times.

Everything about the logistics and facilities went rather well. still a good number of friends and relatives arrived. though things got rather messy and he situation wasnt what i expected, i would still say it went well, considering there was no makor screw ups..

So now i am finally 21, and officially an adult. or rather, an adult by name. But, i would say its a good thing that it does not feel any different for me. cause the only things thats gonna change for me is:

1. i can sign contracts and forms without parental consent. (freedom? to a small extent.)
2. watch R21 movies! (uhh... how nice are they? never tried.)
3. get married legally! (whats the point when i dont have a GF)
4. Vote in the elections. (but i dont even get to vote for this presidential election...)
5. FEEL A LOT OLDER!!! theres gonna be a technical generation gap cause those younger would be kids, teenagers, or youth, while i will be classified as an ADULT! its all about being young at heart?
i hope so. I am so not ready to be an adult.

The first moment of adulthood

2011-08-13T00:47:00.002+08:00

So, i just officially became an adult like 45 minutes ago. Thought of making my entry a bit more memorable, but well nothing came to plan. On the last day and last hour of my non-adulthood, I just being engrossed in shooting the guts out of zombies on L4D - and when i finished, i realised i am an adult already!

All these while i had actually been trying to avoid this day. i see it coming closer and closer, but as long as it had not reached, i told myself that there is still some time to go. I never did anything to 'celebrate' the last few days of my official youth. i guess i have come to realise that i should never be bound by numbers such as my age, and that as long as the situations let me, i can be as youthful as i want, for as long as i feel it. If you ask me, i dont feel a bit like an adult.

But still, i cant help but feel a mite sentimental about it, cause after all its still a fact that i have lived a good 21 years. i can never be 18 again, no matter how much i feel like it. And it is inevitable the people take much heed to the numbers to your years. A whole phase of life has passed. whatever was done within that time is etched into my life and stays as that. Now i can only change the future, starting from what i have built so far.

In any case, i am thankful to God for seeing me through all these years. This is a chance for me to reflect on all the people who have blessed my life one way or another, all the blessings i have received. All the things that formed my formative years... I have come far from where i used to be. Even though there is still way to go; it leaves for much to be yet discovered. All those opportunities i missed that seems to be passed and over, who knows, may be opened to me once again...

Celebrations are supposed to be happy!

2011-07-23T20:46:00.003+08:00

Well i wont know how happy the celebration will be as of now. But for now, the preparations for it sure arent. Here i am experiencing once again my 'birthday woes', wondering what might happen this year, trying not to expect anything but still hope for something... special, nice, extraordinary if possible. This time the feeling's stronger cause its my big 21!

Some say 21 is just another number, and that theres nothing special about turning 21. i could agree to that. but now theres a form of peer pressure in place as well, cause its a widely practiced practice that your 21st birthday should be a special day, even more special than other birthdays, to mark one's official entry into adulthood. while i dont really care about adulthood, i do care about celebrating. while some of my peers are throwing big 21st birthday parties, how could i leave mine blank?

now less than a month remains before the big day, and no plan is in place. there was one i had, but was promptly shot down within one discussion with my parents. After all their negativity and pouring cold water, i too lost interest in the whole idea, along with a chunk of hope. and now im left clueless. argh i really hate this feeling. celebrations are supposed to be happy!

There will be no elaborate party for me. no ballroom or hotel or booking a whole restaurant. that would already be too much for me. I just want something special... not so ordinary like what i would do for any other gathering or event, yet without too much hassle, preparations, and expenses. can nothing fit this deal?

The way its gonna be

2011-07-04T20:22:00.002+08:00

Wow i have been seriously neglecting this blog. But after all, hardly anybody seems to come here except the irritating strangers spamming my chatbox. And there cant be a very interesting life when its army life. From now, things will just be a routine of not-very-interestingness. Yet it is not one which i would dread, and i suppose time in the long term would pass pretty quickly.

About twice a month, i would be stationed for 4 days 3 nights in the place i thought i would never go back to after BMT - Pulau tekong. But life at duty site is very much different from the hellish life if BMT. In time, as i get used to it, i might very well even enjoy that place.

There at duty site, the crew room consists of the pantry, sofas and a wide screen TV. the crew room, bunks, and the office are all in air-con comfort (which is probably the best part!) and the pantry has a stock of snacks, instant drinks, and cup noodles that we can help ourselves to anytime. The briefing room section of the office is turned into an entertainment venue once meetings adjourn; with a computer which is open for anyone to use. the internet knows no bounds. of course we have to take turns and deal with comp hoggers. After midnight or after everyone is done with their work for the day, the projector would be turned on to screen a marathon of movies through the whole night, from the massive collection of movie files on the computer. How they got all those movies... is something to be questioned.
Looks like late night movie marathons with friends would be no novelty by the time i ORD!

Before the movies start, or for those who arent into movies, they stay gathered around the TV and coffee table, watching shows while playing games. in such an informal setting, everyone's ranks are well hidden and we can get down to the same level. It could almost be like a house gathering, if not for our need to keep our guards up for the dreaded alarm going off any time - whereupon we would have to drop everything we are doing, and rush uphill to conduct the arming drill. It is the same reason why we cannot sleep in peace.

At night, the site uphill is totally void of artificial lightings. Even the miles of surrounding area is mostly covered in the darkness of forests, save for the BMT school 4 down the slope. being on one of the highest points in Tekong, standing up there i could see far across the island, over the forest canopies, across the seas and into the shores of Johor and Changi. The night lights along the shores make for a beautiful horizon.

In the dark of the night, when the clouds dissipate, the skies glimmer with stars, where whole constellations could be seen. (some guy pointed out to me the Scorpio constellation using reference to an itouch app.) Staring at them just leaves me lost and dazzled. Also one night, while waiting for the specialists to fix the radar, i saw from the top corner of my eye a bright moving light fly across the sky. At first thinking it was a helicopter, i looked up, and realised the light was not illuminating as a flying machine's floodlights would have been; and it was also flying at such great speed, it couldnt have been a plane. It was a shooting star - a really bright one! I stood in amazement as it flew across the sky for a good 2 seconds before being lost behind some clouds.
How could something several light years away travel across the space with such speed? The speed would have been billions of miles a second!

The tekong as what i am concerned with now isnt anymore a place to be tortured as recruits, and neither are the forests a place of torturous holding out or jungle warfare training. The nature that surrounds are for me to enjoy God's creation, which i can never get enough of. And when i get back in the civilisation and modernisation of the accommodations, i have much a time to relax, release, and enjoy!

Storm of the century

2011-05-28T23:33:00.003+08:00

For all the coming to 21 years of my life, i have never been afraid of thunderstorms. Unless i am out in the open and run the risk of getting instantly vaporized by a strike, lightning otherwise seems like a cool display of fancy lights lighting up the sky - especially at night. The thunder that follows merely adds a dramatic audio effect to the natural dancing lights that altogether forms an admirable display of God's creation.

That was until thursday morning.
At 1.30am, i awoke in my bunk bed to find that there was a huge storm going on outside. The smell of rain was wafting through the bunk, brought in by the wind which usually never reaches my poorly ventilated corner. I was looking out the windows stretching across the whole length of wall to witness the frequent flashes of lightning that turned the whole sky a luminous bluish-white, and illuminated some parts of the bunk. Suddenly, an enormous streak of lightning fell from the sky right before my eyes, seeming like only a hundred metres away, the lightning bolt was so bright i could see a glowing effect surrounding it, and everything in the bunk turned white for that moment. It was instantly accompanied by the loudest crack of thunder, which really sounded like the earth was just split apart before me, and the whole ground shook like when a bomb explodes. I was in total shock, blinded by the flash and shaken by the thunder, in reflex i let out a cry as if i had just been struck.

After a few seconds of stun, i wrapped myself in my blanket, covering all up to my neck. Lightning continued to flash every 10 to 20 seconds, and within one second a furious rumble would follow, causing the ground to shake each time. I felt like the world was collapsing, literally. Never had i experienced anything close to this, and this time i was in the centre of a raging storm. Not too surprising, as my camp is located in one of the most lightning-prone areas in singapore. But i was terrified, a little, and tried to just ignore everything and go back to sleep, suppressing all the adrenaline from the shocks.

Though i know there is nothing to be scared about, my senses kept telling me to keep alert. But soon i began to feel the security of the building and the roof over my head, keeping me totally safe from the storm outside. I fell asleep, feeling no threat at all from the scariest lightning and the loudest thunder.

In the morning, everyone was talking about it over breakfast. I found out that though i hardly saw anyone stirring and moving about during the ordeal, everyone was awoken by the storm. And then there are the stories, like someone seeing a shadow of a headless person cast in front of him when the lightning struck.... only to find out that it was from a set of hanging uniform! haha.

well, it was an interesting, even a cool experience. and as long as it doesnt disturb my sleep, i wouldnt mind witnessing such a storm again...

Home Alone

2011-05-22T00:37:00.002+08:00

A family holiday to Phuket, staying in a spacious chalet/resort with which my dad somehow booked for free and has room enough for 6. thats what the plan was for the whole family; plus invited 2 friends along to take the 2 extra spaces, from May 20 to 23. And i was looking forward to go for it, though always bore in mind the possibility of not being able to take leave. I told the rest to book for themselves first, and when i find out that i can take leave then i would book my own ticket. It turned out to be the right choice.

Only not long ago, after passing out from training did i get the answer - a very straightforward and seemingly bochup 'CANNOT' from the one in charge. the reason? OEMP (on job) training.
Gosh, just when i thought i had exitted trainee life, i find that i am still stuck in it, just with a bit more freedom than before and a few regimentations dispensed.

I vaguely remembered in his reply something about HPI (an equipment that i will not specialise in), and i thought thats funny, why would HPI training be so important to me when i am Launcher-specialised?
True enough, yesterday - the day my family flew off for a nice holiday without me - was spent in camp, the first half of the day sitting in the flight office waiting while the HPI people do their training, and the the later half hanging around the hangar just doing a little launcher training (still half the time doing nothing) while most of the attention was spent on the HPI crew.

I was enraged. Why on earth was i denied of taking leave when there was hardly anything on for me?! I am forced to miss out on a nice holiday that probably wont come again anytime soon, and instead be stuck in camp wasting time away. Every moment being wasted, i thought of where i could have been by then, and what i could have been doing... snorkeling, enjoying the waves, nature, or marine creatures. but its all so far away now.

Being left out did not end there. i am currently at home - home alone - over the whole weekend. And even though i do not talk or interact much with my family when they are around on the weekends, it seems suddenly so different now. the emptiness in the house could always be sensed, and as it stretches over extended periods, it builds a depressing aura that just makes me lose interest in the things i do at home. Good thing i got to go out quite a bit.

Well i hope they are having fun without me. I wont be seeing them till next weekend. I hope more opportunities would come in place of this. And I hope my TCA chief had covered his butt from something by conveniently denying me leave...

Not forgotten

2011-05-17T10:12:00.000+08:00

I see its been almost 2 months since i last blogged, and whoever has been visiting lately probably thinks the blog or its owner is dead... but the truth is, i have always remembered about my blog. but never had the mood, discipline, or inspiration to blog something.
one weekend drags into another, and everytime i find myself having to book in before i find any chance to blog.

Well im rather certain i would not forget or abandon this blog, like i intended from the start to be a whole collection of memoirs since the time it started. In a few days time, it will be the blog's 5th birthday, so.. happy birthday in advance!

Winning Losers Phenomenon

2011-03-26T22:17:00.007+08:00

FRIDAY - REBECCA BLACK

I just recently found out about this song, which came out not too long ago. it has spread far and wide and sure made her famous, and its not hard to understand why.

The thing about this song is that it is so exceedingly bad that it actually becomes amusing... and to some extent even entertaining.

The video is lame and low quality. Her singing is atrocious, sounding like a duck being strangled. And the worst of all is the lyrics; which either:

doesnt make sense

I got this, you got this

My friend is by my right

I got this, you got this

Now you know it

has no link

Gotta make my mind up

Which seat can I take?

It’s Friday, Friday.....

is totally unnecessary

Yesterday was Thursday

Today it-is Friday

Tomorrow is Saturday

And Sunday comes after...wards

or is just plain dumb!

Gotta have my bowl, gotta have cereal (lol)

We-we-we so excited

We so excited

We gonna have a ball today

Partyin’, partyin’ (Yeah)

Fun, fun, fun, fun

Lookin’ forward to the weekend

So after watching the video just once for the first time and listening to the lyrics, i felt half my brain cells were wanting to die right there. The only thing i could say was, "oh my gosh... this is just sooo bad!..."

As one comment on the video goes, "no words are enough to describe how bad this song is..." But the next thing i did was - watch it again! as if it didnt kill enough brain cells...

Sure, she has a like:dislike ratio of 1:9 and has endless hate comments spammed on her video, but in the end she has the last laugh earning big bucks because people all over the world are flocking in to get a taste of the dumbest song ever.

Looks like we are entering a new generation for the music and videos industry. Young wannabes making it big by being so bad at it that they become famous. There was Justin Bieber, and now heres Rebecca Black, perhaps following his footsteps, and surpassing him many times over. And i shouldnt be hating them at all - these people actually make the world a better place! they provide much entertainment value, and great inspiration for parodies on their songs. Just like how Bieber's Baby inspired Banelings...

Unfortunately we wont expect much covers to be made on this song. It is too horrible to be saved. Never mind if the singing is bad, someone else with better singing could do a cover. But now the lyrics are bad, so even the best singer singing it would sound like an idiot. The only way to make a better version is to do a parody.... and im sure there will be many more to come!

One Six Three

2011-03-06T01:08:00.002+08:00

Its time i updated. i would not say i never have the time - i have 2 days every week out of camp and it has been that way without fail ~ no confinements, that is. i could easily spare the time if i wanted to. But the fact that i have not been updating despite having some time just shows that life has been pretty monotonous.

its been 6 weeks into my ADWO course in 163 squadron, estimated graduation in 21st april. this date is already been pushed back from the initial early april, and would push later even more if there continues to be the shortage of instructors and/or equipment - something that has been causing lots of disruptions in my training these few weeks, wasting lots of time, during which i can only sit in the hangar and stare into space. No books allowed. no entertainment. no sleeping either. In these kind of scenarios do i wish the training was more on the ball!

Following the principle of progressive training, physical training has been climbing in intensity each day, and has of now reached 12 sets of 3 chin ups every time before meals + lots of static exercises. our muscles season only to get strained to a higher level. we are plagued by permanent aches. All these physical training, accompanied with a generous/slack medical office leads to a phenomenon of the growing 'status party', which lately has been even bigger than the participating party - i.e. more than half of the course reports sick or is excused from physical activity!

Though the course of the days has been monotonous, the social factors surely isnt. cliques have formed and are hardening up, but interactions still very much occur with fellows outside the comfortable circle. Attitudes also have changed, and some shifting takes place. We continue to learn more about each other every day, and even more about those we interact with often. Unfortunately for me it has not been so good to be well known - for my towel, shirt, and underwear episodes!

Still, no malice i see among this 'family' of 30, unlike how it was in BMT. i know it can never be as bad.

Better After BMT

2011-02-04T20:59:00.002+08:00

It has not even been one month since the day of my graduation parade, passing out from BMT. Yet it seems like an all so distant memory. NS life in my new unit has been very much different from that of BMT... and mostly better.

In BMT, the schedule is packed stiff almost everyday, until the last 2 weeks where we finally experience some adequate free time. Training could last into the night, and even if there was no program after dinner, there would always be some administrative stuff for us to do. so often it even drags past our usual lights-out timing, and they would give an extension not even long enough for us to bathe. on the average we get about 6 hours sleep a day. Now in unit, the program for the day ends by 6pm, and after dinner its all OTOT, free from commander's disturbance. i foresee some night activity in time to come, but probably not too late or often. we can easily get 7 hours sleep everyday now, sometimes even 8.

In BMT, the duty sergeant breathes down our neck every step, every activity we do. Now in unit, the sergeants just follow us around and hardly do anything. Officers and warrant officers have closer contact with us, but only play a supervisory role. Now our own IC takes charge of minor activities. In effect, the 'power distance' between us and each rank of commanders is severely shorter now, and we no longer feel like the lowest lifeforms around.

in BMT, all sorts of people with all sorts of backgrounds, characters, personalities, abilities, and way of life are put together. My platoon, and especially my section, was just a bad combination of people, and our differences were great. Now in this new community, we are all sorted out as those of a certain kind. All the 'leadership quality' people have gone to leadership schools. Those include all the stuck-up arrogant ones who think they are on top of everything and begin scolding all their peers who dont perform as well. they think they are the leaders, so they should be in control. I am now together with the 'non-leaders', who prefer a supportive, backseat stance. we dont insist on our own ways, and so can cooperate much easier. we do not enjoy bossing others around. there are none among us, so far as i can see, who are arrogant, chiongsters, overly influential, or have attitude problems. Now just after 2 weeks, i can feel the bond and camaraderie among us, even greater than my platoon at the end of BMT.

Of course, the camp im in now is significantly lousier and older than Tekong's. But on the take side, at least it is back on the mainland, feeling much closer to home, and takes only half the time to get home, despite being quite an ulu location.

And whats more, after my training phase, life should get even better!
Thanks be to God, who has planned for me my paths, to fulfil His plans for me.

A year since Disney

2011-01-21T23:42:00.009+08:00

Exactly 1 year ago from today, was the last day of my time in Disneyworld, Orlando.
There are just so much memories of that place and time, that i get super nostalgic dwelling on it.
For example, reminiscing my apartment that i stayed in there, the frantic packing up and settling everything on the last day, and not to forget the great mess that was left of the apartment upon our departure.

kitchen sink area

dressing table in bedroom

the whole living room

notice the abandoned spongebob in the corner...

its like a battlefield

looking at the video, i realised there were some stuff i left behind that i still wanted! But anyways, i was already facing a luggage space crisis then, not much more could have been saved back home.

Life has never been the same for me since the time before Disney.
But i have by now fully integrated back into life in my homeland, and it all seems now like just a long, sweet, adventurous dream. I cant be dreaming for too long; I had to wake up someday...

Look to the skies.

2011-01-14T22:46:00.003+08:00

My unit posting is out. For the next 20 months, i will be training to shoot at planes! how interesting. My vocation is called ‘air defence weapons operator’.

when i first saw my posting, i was like ‘ohh cool!’

That was cause its under Air force. But when i look carefully, it actually could very well turn out to be a pretty boring and sian role. I could imagine myself spending 20 months, everyday sitting behind an Anti-air gun, staring at the sky and waiting to shoot enemy planes that never come.

My camp is the Air force school, in the paya lebar area, but far from any MRT. ppl say there is nothing but nothingness around the vicinity of the airbase. like an out-of-civilisation area surrounded by lots of civilisation further out.

Yes, God has a plan for me to be in this position. perhaps in the dullness of my job ill have more time to spend thinking about God. Or maybe i am specially put there to meet a friend, who God wants to reach through me. Or maybe its not as dull and boring as i think, and i gain much from it. Im not disappointed or feeling sian about my posting. Just eager to wait and see whats in store for me. Keep the anticipation up a little! haha.

Got no time for BMT, but got time for POP!

2011-01-11T00:47:00.002+08:00

8 Jan 2011 was a day of double once-a-lifetime celebrations:
Firstly, my cousin's wedding; the first of my cousins to get married. Congrats to him...
And secondly, is none other than my POP!
Though the clash made me miss the tea ceremony in the morning and my parents to miss my POP, i managed to attend both in the end.

POP marked the end of my BMT, and possibly the last of my times on that tekong island. Even if i have to ever go back there again, never again as a recruit!
Memorable is the moment where i tossed up my jockey cap together with 1900 other recruits, standing proud on the marina floating platform, in the sight of our friends and loved ones, and officially graduated from a recruit. But memorable also are the last events leading up to it.

During the last week in tekong, all hell broke loose during our free time in the bunk; pranking one another like there's no tomorrow. I got it one of the worst; with powder, toothpaste, booby trap on my locker, and a massive pin-down.
There was the farewell session with our commanders, where we all powder-bathed them till their hair and uniform were all white. haha.
There was the slightly emotional last departure from tekong island, with both happy and sad feelings.
And then there on the mainland, was our 24+km route march from Changi ferry terminal all the way down East coast park and finally into Marina bay, with our bulging field packs containing everything remaining in our lockers, all in. Our legs were crumbling, shoulders sore, hands numb, and stayed on the brink of falling asleep anywhere - pushed on solely by our morale to POP, so that not one person fell out.

But BMT is only the first 10% of my NS time, meant to turn me from a civilian to a soldier. Its just the tip of the iceburg, all just the basics, all purposed for adaptation. Now the real stuff comes when i join my next unit - to train me from a soldier to be a better, well trained, specialised army personnel. everything should be pushed a bar higher. but it really much depends, cause some accounts say unit life is more slack than BMT... just some give and take.
Now i get a brief 1-week break; a blessed relief nevertheless.
To recharge to fight on again harder and longer, for the rest of my unit life.

I just pray for God's best will for me as to where i am posted to next. i might be disappointed. but i must not let my personal preferences cloud my vision in seeing how God's plan for me is the best.

Year to remember

2011-01-01T12:23:00.004+08:00

Happy New Year!

A new year has come, a new year of oportunities. or at least a chance for opportunities. for new experiences and growth. which im sure there will be.

At this time last year, i was still in Disney world, having celebrated the crossing of 2009 to 2010 with a Fantasy in the Sky fireworks spectacular over the Cinderella Castle. There i was, on the bridge in front of the castle, packed tight within a massive crowd stretching from the castle base until the start of Main Street USA, all trying to get a good view of the fireworks. No doubt it was a high time, and a moment to remember. This time, the last hour of the year was spent in a humble auditorium in a kindergarten, no fireworks, fancy lights, large crowds, party mood and music; but gathered with my family in Christ, all together in our Father's house, dedicating the new year to Him as it arrives. I would say, this is a lot more meaningful.

2009 was a year of transition between 3 different phases for me. first it was the transition from the Disney and American life back to the singaporean life. then into a volunteer and spiritual-based life in YWAM. And then into the regimental life in the army, as present. Each had a nice long 2-month break in between to smoothen the transitions. haha.

Looking back at the years passed, why do years pass faster and faster each time?
It might be a good thing, if it means that things went smoothly through the year.
Or it could be a bad thing if it means i was just passing time and nothing much happened during this time - just a monotonous life.
I think as we get older, time generally seems to pass faster.
But i still feel too young for time to go this fast.

When life gets better

2010-12-18T15:11:00.002+08:00

I know its been a really long time since i posted. But thats because its so rare that i get to book out. Over the span of the 6 weeks that passed, i have spent in total less than 90 hours on the mainland Singapore; with the balance being held in the depressing military island. How so often have i glanced over the 2km stretch of seas that separated me from the mainland, with changi airport in the background, and longed to be on the other side where freedom reigns. Meanwhile it has been rather tough training and tight schedule everyday, which i have since gotten used to.

But life is just about to get better. This week marked the last of the high-key events; which included Field camp, grenade, Sit Test, and live firing. The program schedule has accordingly, very noticeably given a little slack too. Of course not all is over, and things like games day and National Education is taking up a huge bulk of the time now, but that far beats chionging around in the mud and jungle, clad in SBO.

Just a few more things to dread: the final IPPT coming really soon (dreadful only cause i have not secured a silver), and the 16km and 24km route marches. Other than that... a little more physical training and misc training here and there should be about it. All eyes now set on the POP, and the christmas season on the way!

Book-out day!

2010-11-27T23:42:00.003+08:00

Why is my tagboard being spammed by all these spyware artists or sth like that..?

I have finally ended my confinement period and get to book out of that forsaken island! if not for the short hari raya break, i would have been cut from civilisation for 16 days straight. might sound short, but to me it seems i have been stuck on that island for many ages. so much has happened within that time.

I kinda gotten used to the place and lifestyle, experienced muscle aches, blisters, fatigue, hours in the hot sun, sweating a river almost everyday. I became much darker and fitter though. I could feel the change in such a short time.

Today i experience such freedom and luxury that i have since become accustomed to not having... so many things we take for granted, like hot water, a nice bed and room that you dont always need to tidy, computer usage, 7 hours of sleep, the freedom to wake up whenever you want, fix your own schedule, and see the sunlight when you arise. These are the things i am deprived of in there, and it feels just so good to have it back now.

Sadly theres not much time left in my haven. Soon ill be back there for more and worse.
Coming up next is 6 days of field camp - staying in the jungle! to some it sounds like fun, but it wont be once we find out what goes on in there... wish me luck!

Last words as a civilian

2010-11-10T21:43:00.004+08:00

So the time has now come to serve the Nation. My last day as a full-time civilian till 2 years later. Sad, kinda. But trying to keep a positive attitide which hopefuly would remain throughout. I believe keeping a positive attitude is already half the battle won... and there actually isnt much to be afraid or anxious about army. I mean, everyone goes through it, almost all of them survived. the worst that could happen is... finish the 2 years without much achievements. Then life continues as per normal.

So ill just go ahead without any worry, keeping open, learn whatever i have to, and adapt however i have to. that should do it fine... provided i adapt fast enough.

Much of the scaryness of it all probably comes from the uncertainty of it all. That was greatly eased from hearing from those who have gone before me, plus watching the rather new series of 'every singaporean son' videos on youtube, really giving me a good idea of whats to come. Whats to come in the next several hours has also been pre-experienced when i sent off an old classmate off to tekong on tuesday. it was from a civilian view, though. Felt weird that soon enough, ill be like one of them.

Separation from familiar friends and families is also another issue for NSmen, but hey ive gone through the 5 months of total separation when i was in Mickey kingdom; this would be nowhere as bad since im only a few kilometres away, and returning to civilisation every week.

My last few days, not doing as much as i wanted to. But i did have a crash course of driving lessons in this one week before. No, not crashing cars. but yeah, wished i could have done it 1 or 2 weeks earlier, cause then i would be ready for test by now. I already see much improvement after each lesson. into my 6th lesson, i now drive rather comfortably at 50km/h without always checking the speedometer like i used to.

I might correct myself later on, but from what i see now, army cant be that bad. There would be plenty of good experiences and learning opportunities that would outweigh the sufferings endured. Furthermore, though having little confidence in myself, i have much in the One who would see me through. And that turns all anxiety into excitement!

Happy Halloween!

2010-10-31T22:34:00.002+08:00

its time for halloween again. exactly one year ago, i would be in Orlando doing my attachment, celebrating halloween with all the pomp and glamour in the Magic Kingdom's mickeys not so scary halloween party. now back here, nobody cares about halloween. Only the ang mohs in the american club, or some young teens who just wanna play dress up and gather for fun. time really flies... it doesnt seem anything like a year since the last halloween fireworks i saw, and being in disney.

Much to coincidence, today in jym it was video sunday. and the video 'letters to God' featured a part in the Give Kids the World village, which was exactly where i was on 31st october last year, helping out in some halloween party for the sick kids and their families there... brings back such memories at a nice timing.

Its the end of the month of october already... this october was super fast, which means that things were pretty routine - usually not a good thing.
Now i am left with just 11 days before army time... one more weekend, and a few days. Time is short, gotta make every second count.

"It would be a miracle"

2010-10-25T14:35:00.002+08:00

Today was my final theory driving test. I somehow thought it was at 8pm, so i pushed the studying to the last minute, with most of it to be done in the morning and afternoon. I did study some earlier, but much less than planned. Then in the morning i went to check the schedule to confirm, and at the same time do some mock questions online.

To my horror, i found out that my test was actually at 11.45am, effectively taking away 8 hours of study time! I had only barely an hour left to study from the time i found out, and half the textbook was still unread. Furthermore, in doing the mock questions, i failed badly. I told myself, "wah GG for sure already la."

So i checked for the next available test slots, which turned out to be just next week! Sounds good to me, just cancel this one and book next week, giving me just nice amount of time to study. But then i decided, dont cancel it, just go, and use this round as a practice and see what kind of questions would come out.

the main thing i was worried about was that after the test, those slots may be quickly swiped up, leaving me to wait until december or beyond for the next test, when im already into the wild green yonder. So i prayed, "Lord, please save that slot for me. But if i would somehow pass this time, it would be a miracle, and great will be your glory!" And so i went for my test, without any anxiety... and i passed!

It might have been for what i prayed, that He brought the miracle i mentioned to pass. The questions that came were lots of common sense stuff, some repeat from basic theory, but a few tricky ones, those which the Lord then helped me through.
So, just keep praying and have faith - youll never know when God would bring about the miracle you ask for!

Lesson on Humanities

2010-10-17T21:14:00.003+08:00

Countdown is at 25 days before i enter my next phase of life, and a new life altogether. Aint dreading army, but my main concern is that during this remaining time which just flies by at few actual days per seeming day, i must do all the things i hope to do; that i cant do once im in.

Now that work is out of the way, the whole time is free for me to do all the personal activities i want. The big obstacle is however, feeling lazy or forgetting to do them. How weak is the flesh, that it wont even do what my heart wants.

Anyways, I believe God is slowly revealing things and teaching me big lessons through my grandfather. He has moved in to stay with my family for about a month now, since it was decided he cant be staying alone in his little flat after my grandma passed away.

I was against the decision, but reluctantly cooperated. anyways there would also be a maid to take care of him. That meant that we would have to clear space in our already cramped house to make space for another 2 people. And lots of stuff went into my room.

Thats not the main problem. The issue is that I never liked him. In my perception, there is nothing good about him at all. He is grumpy, stubborn, antisocial, uneducated (not discriminating, but just makes him hard to connect with) unappreciative, negative, keeps complaining, sometimes demanding, and self-centred.

He doesnt seem to care about anyone. All he does is eat, sleep and go to the toilet. And once a day for a few minutes he would look at pictures in newspapers. He is hard of hearing, causing lots of problems like him shouting all the time cause he cant hear. Also slightly senile, losing sense of time and reasoning. sometimes hes just plain dumb. Plus many bad habits, which really causes everyone lots of headache.

I find it so hard to tolerate him, let alone love him. But i wonder, why am i fine taking care of other old folks with disabilities, but not him? probably cause he is staying in my house, taking up my comfort, affecting my life, and dirtying my house. Then i realise, actually im the one being selfish! I ought to have a little compassion on a helpless poor old man whom his 2 other children rejected taking him in, and who would live a miserable, suffering and deprived life if he continued staying alone. after all, he is also my grandfather, whether i like it or not.

Since i realised that, i have been very much tolerant and accommodating towards him, and dont let all his bad points affect me so much. Then, recently God brought a little light to him. for the first time, i saw him smile and heard him say ‘thank you’. he went for an operation and can now hear better. he also showed improvements in his bad habits.

Praise be to God, the best teacher of all, and Lord over all our circumstances!

Stranded in the middle

2010-10-05T00:50:00.002+08:00

The job hunt is over. I have given up on finding one to last for these 36 days remaining before i lose my freedom. The last straw came when even an apparent successful interview for a part time restaurant job was in the end dismissed because it was too short a time to work. Never thought so, thus taking some time to rest and slack first, taking my time to find a job. Now the effects of my procrastination has come to bite me.
I am now stranded in the middle of my 2 months stretch of free time - having rested pretty much enough for a month, and having not enough time to do some work in the remaining month.

The good news is, i have now an extra 36 days of freedom! whooo...
The bad news is, after it all, i would have slacked/relaxed/been free for more than 2 months. and so far in the month passed, it has not been so productive; in fact boring at times. of course theres the loss of opportunity to also earn some money and gain some valuable work experience.

I have identified the cause lack of productivity during my free time at home to be lack of discipline... and its precisely because i am in the comforts of home, that i feel so at ease to do whatever i want - which happens to be not very productive activities. Looks like going on myself the hard way is the only way to ensure this time i bought will not be wasted away.

At the start of it, i had already committed this time to the Lord to guide me and open opportunities for me to spend this time meaningfully. Seeing the way all the jobs i tried for turned out so unfavourably towards me, i guess God has plan for me to just ... be free.
I await to see what God has in store for me during this time.... just hope it wont be the same as the month passed.

The Time Void

2010-09-11T21:22:00.004+08:00

It has been a week since Go fest Asia officially came to a close, and on the same note, everyone working in it were all immediately retrenched. The gofest team now heads each to their own separate ways - mostly to school, and those who are staff continue their services in YWAM doing whatever assumingly mundane tasks it needs. Then there is Yijay going for DTS. But i am the only one now, who has barely 2 months more till the next big commitment - the National Service - and feeling lost at how to spend the time now that the job i have been on for the past 4 months has ceased to exist.

The problem is, 2 months isnt exactly a very long time; hardly enough to make any new long term commitment. (otherwise i might have even done DTS too) Yet at the same time it is too long for slacking around without getting bored out, running dry, and having an 'occupation void' which i may have to explain to people. While it may be possible to spend this 2 months meaningfully while having full control of my schedule - provided i have the discipline to live up to this lifestyle, i am beginning to believe that the conventional method of getting a job to meaningfully spend the time is a better choice.

Ever since day 1 of life after Gofest, my parents have been relentlessly bugging me to find a job, and asking me several times a day "have you found a job? are you still looking for a job? how are you going to spend these 2 months?..."
even before gofest ended, they already asked me to start looking for a job, so that i can start immediately after. using up my freedom immediately after ive gained it back is certainly not what i would do, and their kancheongness is driving me to annoyance.

Though i could qualify for a few diploma level jobs, i believe none of them would accept someone working with them for only 2 months. this space is only to be filled with part-time jobs, of which open to me now are basically revolving around sales, odd jobs, or restaurant service. A few choices have popped up; none of them making me go "alright, i shall do this!"

Perhaps i should wait longer for God to open to me an opportunity i cant resist? But that way i would be treading the fine line between procrastination and waiting on the Lord. Where shall it fall?

Anyways, im back to a bit of gardening again. of course there is no plot of land for my space-constrained condo apartment, so they grow in just small pots by the window. These plants are very interesting. The 2 of them are the same species, they look exactly the same, except that one bears red flowers, and the other bears purple flowers. They were brought in with the soil, hidden as tiny seeds which sprouted out. i have since adopted them. I have been growing for almost 3 months has flowered and finally bore fruit. inedible ones.

A land of serene wonder

2010-08-28T22:32:00.006+08:00

Back from a really enjoyable, refereshing time in Japan. it is an enthralling experience, with so much deep rooted culture, unique sightseeing (mostly natural attractions) and experiences you just cannot get elsewhere.

Nature there seems so peaceful - no predators or animals that might potentially harm people. they are somehow more beautiful too. As a result, the people have long had a strong connection and harmony with nature, and the animals in turn have become generally more trusting of humans and each other.

Things there are extremely expensive, though. Every meal we usually spend 600 to 1000 yen (about $10 - $15) per head on a simple proper meal, consisting of a bowl of ramen, udon, soba, meat rice or bento, plus a soup and sometimes a few extra sides. though on many occasions, our meals shot above the 1000 mark for sth a little more. my parents got so sick of having the same food all the time, but i enjoy it and dont mind still having more.

Nothing in japan is cheaper than in singapore. 99% of the stuff there is more expensive, comparatively with something similar you can get here. i dont really buy the idea of higher quality in everything. ironically, even the stuff imported from japan is cheaper here than in japan itself!

Transport is a killer expense. While a train ride in singapore would cost between 70 cents to $2, the train tickets in japan railway are priced from a about 250 yen ($4), to over a thousand per head for travelling between towns. going from Osaka to Arima cost over 2000 after many transfers. But the most ridiculously overpriced was the 1.5 hour trip from Kimiidera to Shirahama - costing about 3000 yen per person! for the 4 of us, back and forth, it adds up to 24000 yen... which means $320, just on train ride alone!

Itinerary for the japan trip

Day 1 and 2 - Kimiidera, Wakayama
remote town, nothing much there. explored the place, up some hill, and had Mos burger 3 times since there was nothing better to eat, other than the canteen style restaurant a 10mins walk from the hotel, where we had my birthday dinner. nothing very glamorous to spend my birthday in a place like that, but its still a unique experience.

Second day, took a day trip to Shirahama, which incurred a bomb in train ticket expenses. i felt it was not worth it at first, but my dad was surprisingly willing to part with that sum for the few hours of visiting this famous coastal area. There, we saw great cliffs overlooking the sea at Sandapeki, pancake rock formations, the arched rock island, and the most crowded beach ever. Though the attractions are not uniquely japanese, it is nonetheless fantastic scenery and sightseeing. worth the cost? ill still say its subjective.

in the morning, took a short trip to the temple at the foot of the mountain, a stone's throw from the hotel. overlooks the cityline of Kimiidera. had to pay 200 yen per head.

Day 3 - Nara
My personally favourite part of the trip. we stayed in the most cramped hotel ever, but it was near the train station and also to the park. However, we still had to walk for over 2 hours to get around the park. in that park, wild Nara deer roam the shady groves, and sometimes cross paths with humans to mingle with us. They are so surprisingly tame - would bow for food (some were trained to do that), eat from your hand, and doesnt react when you touch it... or even beat it! they never harm people, other than some male deer poking you with their antlers to get your attention. happened once to me, because i had food in hand.

We happened to be in Nara just at a good timing for the midsummer festival, so that night the park was specially opened, the lanterns were lighted with written wishes on them, and huge crowds gathered in the dark open field to witness the annual lighting up of the Daimonji, bonfires on the distant mountain forming the 大 word. there was also special stuff going on in the temple, but not of interest to me.

we didnt get enough of the deer park, and went again to a different part in the morning. but our schedules were made much less flexible by the standard check-out at 10am and check-in at 3pm.

Day 4 - Kyoto
Arrived in Kyoto shortly after noontime, still few hours short of the 3pm checkin time. we had to leave our luggages with the hotel safekeeping and went out to the huge mall to look around and have lunch - italian restaurant food which was cheaper than jap food. Seeing the map of the surrounding area, it was just saturated with attractions, we were lost at what to see. they were mainly shrines, temples and ancient imperial buildings in the ancient capital. but since we were lacking of time, we decided on one of the main highlights

the Kiyomizu temple, a massive wooden structure built on a platform rising above the forests on the mountain slopes. it involved quite a long climb uphill, and at the temple it offers view of the vast forest, and the city of kyoto in the background. the sun was beginning to set when we were there, creating a spectacular display of sun rays emitting from between the clouds and onto the city. we could also help ourselves to cold, fully natural, potable spring water.

At night, we excitedly awaited the lighting up of more bonfires on the mountains. This time, there were 5 of them each of a different character or symbol in different locations. at 8pm when the fire was supposed to start, there was nothing to be seen. 15 minutes later, 2 spots of fire far in the distance appeared. we were disappointed, thinking it was a flop. then the policeman brought us to another spot on the bridge we were on, and voila, the 2 spots turned into a whole character - we were viewing it from the wrong angle all along!!
we were still too far to see it properly, and recommended going to a nearer bridge. but by the time we walked there and dug through the crowd, the bonfires were no more. ultimate disappointment. even the short fireworks we missed.

the next morning, we took a ride out of the town border with the remaining time we had to the Arashimaya bamboo gardens to visit the dense bamboo groves, which tower high above from the sides of the path and create a canopy of shade within the whole garden. on the other side of the groves, we found a place which costs 1000 yen to enter to a good observation point. and then we also found an uphill path nearby. reckoning that it was an alternate path to avoid the entrance fee, we hiked up the steep dirt road. it emerged up on a high hill, overlooking a scenery of mountains, valleys and a river in the valley. awesome kodak spot. but due to the rough climbing, my slippers decided it could take the strain no more, and the strap broke off right when we reached the top of that hill. talk about good timing. needless to say, it took a great deal of trouble making my way down and back to the city. most of the time i went barefooted. reaching back, i got tape and safety pins to fix it, and it was fine again.

one day is definitely not enough for Kyoto.

Day 5,6 and 7 - Osaka
Arrived in Osaka from kyoto only in the late afternoon, since Arashimaya took up quite a lot of time. first day was just for rest and recouperation from the packed sightseeing schedule so far. but it wasnt totally wasted away, as we took to the Dotonburi shopping district at night to see the nightlife scene.

second day, we went to the aquarium near the sea, a short train ride away. entrance fee was 2000 yen each, quite a famous place. and yes, it was worth the cost and trip, cause the sea creatures on display were indeed very interesting, rarely seen, and spectacular. some of my favourites were the dolphins, porcupine fish, arowanas, many kinds of jellyfish, manta rays, whale sharks, and the japanese deep sea crabs. quite a number of the creatures were super huge, capable of feeding a family of at least 30, if it were to be cooked. like the giant tuna. the whale shark could feed a few hundred, easily.

an incident that happened earlier, i mistook an adapter card for a memory card, and used it for my camera. the memory became full after just a few pictures to my horror, and i found out too late. fortunately the shop there sells memory cards at 2800 yen each.

the rest of the day was relaxing in the hotel again, and in the evening we went to Dotonburi, again. this time shopping had some results; we emerged from Uniqlo with bags of apparel.

Third day, we went to the historical landmark; the Osaka castle. it wasnt as spectacular as it sounds, but still had great architecture. other than the building itself, the walls and moat also added much to the attraction's scenic factor. we declined to pay 600 yen to enter the castle, so we just took shots from outside, for free. good enough.

At night, we went, yet again, to Dotonburi. this time we wasted a lot of time trying to find the fish market that my dad somehow wanted to see so badly. but by night, 90% of the stalls have closed. common sense says nobody buys fish at night.

Day 8 - Arima Onsen
having enough of Osaka, we checked out punctually and made our way to Arima via an expensive train ride. Arima is a very different scene - the place is mostly inclined and sloped terrain with mountains in the background, making for a great landscape and scenery. buildings there are all low-rise, except for the Arima grand hotel, which is located at the foot of a steep hill. we got around my walking or bus; it wasnt a very big place. the hotel was like a resort; the only one among those we stayed. it also had free Onsen facility for guest use. i wanted to use it at night, but i found it too hot, and decided to back out.

That evening, we went to the Mt Rokko ropeway station to take the ropeway (like cable car) up to the base on the top of Rokko mountain. it was really expensive, but the only other way was by car, a long drive up the steep sloping path. the ropeway ride took us over vast thick forest covering the mountains and breathtaking heights. at the top of Mt Rokko, it really feels much cooler. the whole cityscape could be seen way in the distance, a far way down below. however, just when we got there, a wretched fog covered the city and mountains, greatly spoiling the scenery. the fog dispersed at night time, and we could see the city lighted up. we used the telescopes there as camera stands, and also paid 100 yen to look at the moon for 50 seconds. the craters could be seen. we took countless shots of the view; what was claimed to be a 'million dollar view'. and we had a good rest that night.

the next morning was spent visiting the arima grand hotel just to check it out, and the canal-turned-water-playground. then we got dressed in the traditional robes provided, and had a family photoshoot in the tea room.

Day 9 and 10 - Kobe
nothing much to see in this city area; but the hotel was nice, and there were 2 convenience stores just outside, selling all kinds of goodies and ice cream and good prices - a perfect place to be for the last destination, where we can buy our goodies to bring back.

For dinner, since we were in Kobe, dad decided to look for a restaurant to try the famous kobe beef. we found one nearby, and went for it. but what we didnt expect is that it was a fine dining gourmet restaurant - which only means crazy prices. We ordered one kobe beef set meal, 1 exotic beef set meal, and 2 ordinary beef set meals, to be shared among us. we had a private space and a grill in front of our table, where the chefs prepared the food in front of us. the chefs were highly skilled, and also trained for entertainment of customers. while cooking he would do everything with style, and a few tricks like throwing the pepper shaker into his hat. all the ingredients were of finest quality, and cooked with special care and attention. everything tasted fantastic; far better than what you could normally get outside. as for the kobe beef, it is indeed legendary as it is known. Meat so fine and tender, it is firm but soft, and almost melts in the mouth with a fragrance and taste that fills the whole palate. it had a good deal of marbling fat, which is probably what makes it so good, but undeniably it is better than ordinary beef, and when cooked under the highly trained chefs, produced amazing result.
The bill was a killer, amounting to over 30,000 yen -- 500 singapore dollars! but it was a really enjoyable experience, something new, high in novelty, and in my opinion, worth the cost for the experience.

On the last day of the trip, we went to see the Himeiji castle in the morning. it took a 1000yen/pax train ride to get there, and only to discover that it was under renovation! scaffolds and cranes were on the castle, making it pointless to take photos of it. again, we declined to pay 600 yen to enter the renovating castle. we just spent less than an hour in the surrounding area before heading back. what a wasted expensive trip.

At night, we walked along the streets, past a shopping mall, into china town, and made our way to the port of kobe. at the harbour, the place was dim, with pretty colourful lights from the restaurants and night spots on the other end. it was a really romantic scene, and many couples could be seen there. a big ferris wheel with changing rainbow lights stood on the other side, and i watched it for a long while. our last dinner in japan was at a simple restaurant - i had gyuniku udon. followed by ice cream dessert from the store.

we had to pack everything up by that night, to catch an early bus the next morning to the airport, for our 11am flight. And that concludes the end of a wonderful, seemingly long experience in japan. ahh, now its just back to singapore again.

Off to Japan!

2010-08-12T21:11:00.002+08:00

Ill be leaving in a few hours time for the land of the rising sun.
i guess i should be excited, going for a family holiday in a real long time, and to japan for my first time.

This is the trip i have been fretting over since 3 months ago, going through a whole episode of dilemma before making the decision, and happening at the cost of missing out on a large chunk of Go Fest Asia and the SYOG - both once a lifetime events; as well as more than $10k in expenses.
At the same time, family holidays come at a rare chance too in the recent years, and the chance to have it in japan comes once in my lifetime so far. Such an amount of money to spare is also hard to come by. I know some ppl go on holidays 2 or 3 times a year, going as far as europe and have gone to japan countless times. I have not such fortune, thus this opportunity is to be treasured.

All i want now is for God to show me why He has arranged for the trip to occur at such a bad timing, and why i should miss out on Go fest and SYOG. then i shall fully be at peace.

Peak of activity

2010-08-07T22:56:00.002+08:00

Go fest asia is now just 3 days away, i can smell it in the whole atmosphere at YWAM and the accommodations. I am now feel the extreme heat of the activity. The past few weeks have been a heck of a busy time, with hardly any time for play or stuff like blogging.

The madness started since i went back to work after the 4-day episode of grandma's funeral. Arriving at base on sunday night, because it was a movie night at base, i saw everyone else in the room watching a movie, while my hospitality team was outside, doing work! I have not been told of any meeting, but i knew i should get involved too. Since then, i felt the pressure was on us, and was only to grow. It aint no play time anymore.

Since then, from how we spent the evenings playing and bonding and hanging out often, it was reduced to zero play time ever since. Instead, we worked morning till night. Staying over at ywam base only means you have more time to do work. Probably if i went home after work everyday, i would be doing much less work. but thats not exactly what i want. Gone are the good times... it will never be the same again, even after go fest.

The hospitality team thought we could get a breather when registration closed - with a total of 274 registrants, about 80 being Singaporeans - and we are relieved of most office work. How wrong i was - field work proved to be much more demanding! Though many times it didnt require us to work as hard and drain our brains out like the office work did, it required to be at the site of activity for much of the time; be it at the accommodations or at the airport to welcome delegates, draining us physically and demanding way lots of our time.
Unprecedented in office days, i am now even forced to give up my weekend to work. saturday morning and afternoon was burnt at SAV, i demanded to go back at night, and denied the request of my leader to go back to work on sunday.

this madness will only happen once though. and after hard labouring comes the harvest of fruits. which i may not get to harvest, sadly.
Speaking of that, it is all due to my family holiday to Japan, just very unfortunately timed to coincide with the peak of activity, and the go fest event itself. There could be no timing worse than this. But u have made my choice, after much dilemma, and i will go to japan, the first time for me. I hardly gave thought about the trip, and it caught me by surprise to realise it is just a few days away. Oh wells. till then when i blog again, i might have already gone there and come back!

The Lord welcomes her

2010-07-13T15:45:00.003+08:00

Just as i was settling in for a sumptuous picnic lunch with my prayerwalk team, an unexpecting phone call from my mom informed me that my grandmother had just passed away this morning.

I had no immediate reaction. I didnt know how to react. In fact, i just kept a straight face, continued eating, talking and playing. I didnt tell them so as not to spoil the happy mood. It all seems like nothing happened. But inside, i was feeling all morbid, and had the sentimental feeling i get when i realise that someone i know is gone forever. It was especially strong this time, since the person is not just a friend's relative, a parent's friend, a church member, or a distant relative. This time, it is my own grandmother, whom i have known all my life.

The news came as quite a shock to me, cause i just saw her on Saturday, when the grandparents are routinely fetched to my place and taken care of for the day. She still could walk, still could talk and eat. Though i could see she was really weak and suffering from the unknown huge throat lump, she was not in any apparent critical or life-threatening condition. I had expected her passing to come with a little more warning.

On saturday, after seeing her in her weak state and just imagining the suffering she must be going through with that huge lump in the throat - which caused her difficulty eating, talking and breathing; made worse by the phlegm that she had to constantly cough to clear, i thought that it would be better if my grandparents were taken home to the Lord without having to deteriorate slowly and suffer in the process.
I even made a post on my facebook wall saying, "I would rather the Lord take them suddenly, than to see them slowly deteriorate like this." it was referring to my grandparents. Of course i didnt go so far as to wish them dead. But a few days later, the Lord really took her.

Did God grant my request, or was it just His timing?

Perhaps this would be a good time to write a testimony for my grandmother.
My grandmother was probably born to a poor family. She was uneducated, and was a housewife ever since she married. my grandfather didnt earn much either, and they lived in meagre conditions during my dad's younger days too. By God's grace though, my dad managed to break out of the poverty.
I dont know when she became a christian - it might have been even after i was born.

She briefly took care of me when i was young. she would visit me quite often. But i was never close to her - main reason being that she spoke cantonese and extremely little english, while i spoke english and extremely little cantonese.
But i could see that she really adored her grandchildren - whenever i visited her, she would have snacks or yakult bought just for me and Joel. they were not leftovers. When they visited, she would also bring those stuff along to give me. Even when my parents visited them and i didnt, she would pass it to my parents to bring back. During chinese new year and birthdays, she would give big hongbaos.

But just recently about 3 years ago, the time came when she suddenly became senile. She forgot everything that happened in recent times, and couldnt even remember my name. she only knew i was someone related to her, and that i once was a small boy. therefore whenever she saw me, she would repeat over and over again what means "such a big kid already!" in cantonese. needless to say, there were no more snacks, gifts and hongbaos too.

both she and my grandfather deteriorated significantly over the past 3 years. some were so fast and sudden we were totally unprepared for what comes next. And finally came the mysterious lump, which is what i believe pushed her body beyond what it can bear.

But one thing i really admire in her, is that even after she became senile, God's name was always on her lips. at night, she would be sitting and staring into space, softly muttering prayers and thanksgiving and singing short phrases. She would repeat the same thing over and over again like a broken tape recorder. I believe it is to God's delight that this 'broken tape recorder' was stuck at this recording.

Throughout her years of suffering and being senile, she always remained so calm and peaceful, almost like she's in her own paradise. Everything we do for her, she would always thank us. Indeed she is a prime example of one having the peace of God which surpasses all understanding.

Now she has finally made it back to her true home. I am not sad, in fact i am happy for her. Her sufferings are over, her perfect form restored, and joy shall fill her days for eternity. Perhaps she can remember me again now, but she will be too busy rejoicing with God to spare a thought about Earth.

Whats up?

2010-07-04T22:56:00.005+08:00

1. This is a sight i came across at Woodlands after my music class.

No he is not dead or injured or whatever. He is listening to his MP3 and trying to sleep, on a public stairway at a not so quiet time, also trying to ignore everyone around. People were walking past every few seconds, casting disgusted or disdained looks at him. Some avoided him; some going halfway up and seeing him, would turn down and go up the other side. He was seen not just like dirt, but more like filth. I wonder why he chose to sleep in such an awkward place, awkward position to attract such negative attention. thats not up to me to speculate.

What could i have done in reaction to this situation? it just made me wonder. I pray that we wont end up like this man, and neither would we be like that woman who just walked right past without a care.

2. I have seriously, significantly gained weight. I have gained weight during my time in America, and the same amount again within 2 months of coming back. But the biggest weight gain i believe would be in the past 2 months; and i have not weighed myself since.
I need no weighing scale - my pants can testify for it. One pair i wore in USA fitted comfortably, but is now bursting from my figure and unable to button. A pair or jeans i bought was too big despite being the smallest available, it would just fall off without a belt, but not anymore now.

People say the way to lose weight is to eat less, exercise more. Yes i have been eating more and not being hesitant to ever since i went to Disney, but i didnt gain much weight until, i started exercising! Yes it was all for the sake of Napfa that i trained more seriously - and the result is that it made me big. Though its a large consolation that i put on mostly muscle, i have irreversibly destroyed the petite figure i once had. Hahah.

3. The first time i talked to my parents regarding staying over in YWAM base during weekdays, i was met with an immediate strong objection. The objection mainly came from my dad.
The next time, i talked to my dad alone. I thought it would be better to talk to them separately, so that they wont influence each other against me. He still firmly maintained his stand, shrugging aside any explainations i give, and holding to his hardline statement: "youre part of this family, this is your home, as far as it is possible, you stay here."

Then i tried talking to my mom. And she went to sit with my dad, then asked me to talk! So no choice, i was prepared to have my dad hear the conversation and throw in his negative comments and skew my mom's thoughts away from me.
But that was not the case.
I realised, my mom was never against it. She never really said anything for or against it. She was neutral, and wanted to consider between mine and my dad's views. So i said my piece, and surprisingly, my dad kept quiet until i finished.
Then he said, "i guess it would be a good learning experience for you. But make sure you really learn something useful when youre there..."
He totally made do without his stand that he so firmly held to the previous time!
Indeed, God is mighty to change people and soften their hearts, mystically and miraculously! Thats also a sign that i should be staying in YWAM after all.

4. I have joined in with an initiative among the go-fest team to fast from a certain something for 40 days, until the time of go-fest. Without needing much thinking, i decided i would fast from activities after midnight - cause it was something ive been regularly doing and i know its not very good. many times it just goes out of control.

It has been so far so good, though suffering slight withdrawal symptoms when i feel the urge to do sth more before i sleep. However, i can see a greater struggle coming, as i would have to miss the World Cup Finals!!! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh......

Ive already been missing the 2.30am matches and feeling quite sour about it. But at least i got to watch the 10pm ones (like the very exciting match between germany and argentina). This time, its the finals! the ultimate, biggest, supposedly most exciting match of the whole game - and its at 2.30am!
Well, discipline comes with a cost. Endure the pain to train myself for worse ones to come. Some i foresee include the go-fest bunch having fun late into the night. Enjoy without me, guys! .....

Update 26/6

2010-06-26T23:22:00.002+08:00

I see its been 20 days since i last updated... almost 3 weeks.
My life during this time has not been boring, unfruitful nor monotonous. in fact so many things happened that i forgot quite a few of them. Failure to blog the past 3 weeks is attributed to either Forgetting, Lazy, or No time. In which No time is most often the case.

wednesday 9th June, was the day the silver award for Napfa was finally given to my hands. After countless tries and re-tries, i achieved what ive been persevering towards - quite unexpectedly and miraculously though.
I didnt even feel like going that week. i felt i needed more time to train, after seeing my SBJ and sit n reach deproving. it was like a pit i have been struggling to get out of, yet when my hand gets a grip, my foot slips down. But what compelled me to attempt that day and even made me hopeful to an extent, was that just the day before, as part of the bi-weekly Go-fest prayer walk, i was part of the group that went to the toa payoh stadium to pray cause it is a YOG venue. A coincidence that it is the place i have been going every other wednesday, trying for my napfa, just wishing for the time i could stop seeing the place again. Since we were there, my prayer team took the chance to pray for my deliverance from my Napfa agony. And there we were - praying at ground zero, just the day before the next test.
And the next day, the Lord delivered the Napfa into my hands. Though a combination of God-sent testers, ideal weather, and divine help. I obtained the silver award, on the extreme borderline of it. Had i done any poorer for any station, i would have missed it.
the 2.4km run was the most miraculous one. my legs were wasted from the 5 tries of shuttle run. i felt the strain already from the moment the run began. totally prepared to fail. i was burnt out halfway through. but somehow i just kept going, never slowed too much. i finished with 27 secs to spare - it was the second time i ever passed my running.
Immediately i felt as if my chains were broken. All that happened before doesnt matter anymore - it is finished!!

Now im waiting for my new enlistment letter, which has yet to come. I could just throw away my enlistment letter for september. It should now be in november... extra 2 months free yay!

14 - 17 june - St James church camp (taking root, bearing fruit)
held all the way in malacca, in renaissance hotel; or in the case of several fortunate jym guys, staying in the suites of Bayview. The camp was more like a retreat, with 4 sessions thrown in. it was buffet day and night, for all meals. ate till i was sick of food each time.
there was quite a lot of free time (some of which were bought using sleep time) for supper, swimming, birthday celebration, watching movies in the room, and playing poker. thats not including the 7-hour free & easy time on the third day where everyone went shopping and got rather bored.
overall i wouldnt say it was very fun or memorable, but it was a great time of relaxation, with much fellowship. thats something important too.

The friday which followed was supposed to be a work day for me, which i took off to go to Universal Studios in sentosa with a bunch of friends. we met, made our way to sentosa, paying the $3 entrance fees, headed to USS, only to find a signboard outside saying, "Universal Studios Singapore tickets for today - SOLD OUT."
i might have just strangled the ticket booth guy if he wasnt hiding in that booth.
ended up just watching a movie at vivo and then trying to kill time walking around the shops.

And this week hasnt been anything much.... other than a pastor's breakfast which really helped to kickstart the churches into action for go-fest, and a subsidised Go-fest outing to minds cafe.
It should be more eventful in the weeks to come. im looking forward to it!

Call Of Duty

2010-06-06T22:14:00.000+08:00

I thought i had escaped the september batch. I heard that several people have already received their letters for enlistment into the army in September... I did not receive any. When would be the next intake after that?.. December? i dont know, but m sure would be a long time. I started coming up with long-term plans on how to spend my time after Go-fest asia.

Then i came home one day and found a letter for me, with the words 'enlistment notice' water-marked all over it. and just like that, the anticipation ive been having for so long was broken so abruptly. the only reaction i had to seeing my enlistment date was, "oh.."

my enlistment date is currently 13th sept. Just below the enlistment date stated in the letter, a sentence in caps stood out bold and menacing:
"AS YOU DID NOT ACHIEVE THE REQUIRED NAPFA TEST STANDARD, YOU WILL UNDERGO 8 WEEKS OF PHYSICAL TRAINING PHASE, FOLLOWED BY 9 WEEKS OF BASIC MILITARY TRAINING"

immediately after reading that sentence, for a moment my heart sank. then i realised; hey its not over yet, its not too late unlike what is stated that 'YOU WILL UNDERGO'. In actual fact, i still have about 3 months to train and try to attain my silver for napfa.
And when i do, i can totally scrap this enlistment letter, cause then ill get a new letter in which my enlistment date shall be pushed back one month, till october. I have tried many times already, and i am not far from the mark now.

Oh yeah, im still gonna have one more month of precious free time after Go-fest and before army! Ive been hearing this piece of advice couple times already, "make use of every moment of your free time before army, cause when you go into the army, youll really appreciate and treasure every moment of free time you have."

I pray that ill get this extra month of free time. And I pray that my remaining free time wont be disappearing into emptiness like it did for the 2 months after returning from disney.

Boon's Birthday Bash Busted

2010-05-29T00:05:00.000+08:00

26th may was the birthday of someone in my hospitality team - Boon. It was rather last minute already and we had nothing planned for him to celebrate his birthday. So we decided, we should make his birthday interesting by playing a prank on him!

Prank plans were being brainstormed, discussed, evaluated and voided. so in the end the decision was left to me to draft the plan and spread it on facebook to everyone except Boon. within the short amount of time we had to get prepared... i figured it is still very possible.

Here was the plan.
Luke shall be the main character in this play.
At dinner time, Luke would ask us to go for dinner. we pretend to be really busy, tired or lazy. whatever it takes to be reluctant to go out.
Luke then chooses Boon to follow to buy dinner back.

Once theyre gone, we wait for Luke's tip-off that they are returning. we then leave the conference room and head to (plan A) prayer room, or else (plan B) upstairs to hide.

When the two comes back and finds everyone gone, Luke acts shocked, confused, angry, whatever is appropriate.
Bring Boon out to the lounge where the dinner would be. Make a call to us to ask where we are - that would be the signal to ambush Boon!

We would charge in from (A) the small door at the lounge or (B) the kitchen area.
Seeing us charge in, that would be the cue for Luke to start to STRONGARM Boon - the rest of the guys would join in too - pin him to the ground and TAUPOK him!!!
The girls can help to video/take pictures, or even help the guys out.

When we feel he's been squashed enough, we can all wish him Happy Birthday!

And so it was, the plan was set, everyone agreed, and i saw that it was good.
When the time came for us to get dinner, things went unexpectedly well for the plan.
Boon actually had to go out to buy flowers... so we told him to just buy dinner for us on the way!
Luke followed him and they left. all according to plan, and no fishyness!

But then, the girls decided to do up some paper banners for him, reading "happy birthday Boon Keng". as if words were not enough, each person even added in colours, patterns and drawings onto the banner. That was what we were doing the whole time after the two had left... instead of getting ready and hiding away.

After some time, the tip-off came from Luke. "on our way back", he messaged.
I immediately announced to everyone, "theyre coming, on the way back now! lets go!"
The banners, however, were still not finished. so they frantically continued on it, wanting to finish it before going. They thought that Boon wont be back so soon. I thought that way too, but still strongly urged them to go now, just in case.
Nobody would listen.

I was going to check outside when suddenly Kenny, who knew about our plan, told me that they were back already - just outside the office! We were totally caught off guard, we were suddenly plunged into panic and confusion.
The first thing on my mind was, "major screw up! abort mission."
at that, i went outside to meet Boon. The rest of the team, however, had not given up on the plan. they responded very quickly to turn off the conference room lights, close the door and everyone hide behind the curtains. Fortunately there was enough room for everyone.
Boon came in, found everyone gone. just a little surprised, he went outside. he didnt notice anything. I realised, not all was lost; we could still do something!
ten points to the team for good emergency response.

A new plan was to be formulated on the spot. we had no time to discuss, and thus were extremely confused and disorganised. Luke and I followed Boon around, made a call to them like to ask where are they. i told them where we are - in the lounge, then to the SBS classroom, then the lounge again - Boon was getting suspicious and was moving around the place, only to see me and Luke tailing behind. I told them on the phone to come out now, increasing Boon's suspicion even more. They didnt come out in time.
Soon enough, Boon was high on the alert, running away from me and Luke, even hiding at the walls beside the mango tree. The team had come out and was trying to somehow hide outside the office; all very confused, not knowing how to coordinate or where Boon is.
Boon came out of his hiding place, and there he saw everyone outside the office!
That was it, our cover was broken; ambush was no longer an option. the only thing to do was -- ATTACK!! chiong ahh!!

Luke grabbed him from behind, immobilising him. then the guys each took a leg or his hands, and carried him over to the grass patch, and taupoked him right there!
It was not a very clean place - grass, mud, twigs and leaves covered the area, and just inches away from his face there was a rotting mango.

It was a consolation prize that at least we managed to accomplish the main action of the plan - to taupok him. But i was still rather frustrated that overall it was a failure; it could have been so much better. The coordinated surprise was totally lost. My painstakingly-crafted plan was ruined because we didnt stick to plan.
Not only that, i was being blamed for its failure.
I was accused of checking my phone late for the tip-off message.
I was accused of taking too long to decorate the banner, otherwise it might have been completed in time.
I was blamed for not getting the team out of the room immediately.
people hinted that my plan was not good.
there were a lot of assumptions. people just had to find someone or sth to take the blame.
I believe the plan would have turned out well if we sticked to the plan.

Well, it might have been God's plan that my plan failed. Cause then it also became a good learning experience. Misunderstanding, miscoordination, emergency reaction, responsibility. these are things i would probably have to deal with much in the future, and i could learn from this incident.

Lightning week

2010-05-22T22:33:00.000+08:00

So i see my blog hasnt been updated in quite a while. While it would usually mean that my life had been boring and monotonous for that period of time; this time there was so much happening, just that i couldnt really find a chance to post it.

Previously, not too long ago, there was the whole big issue about whether to go to japan or to stay for go-fest. It has since been decided on, in a very sudden, unexpectedly easy way. Its really funny cause i had been praying, thinking and debating about it so much, then suddenly the decision came so easily, as if all those thinking was for nothing.

How was it decided on? It wasnt even my decision actually. It was my parents, by simply booking the plane ticket and accommodations for me. Apparently the available seats for flights during our desired time were disappearing fast. My dad could not wait for me to think about it any longer, and just went ahead to book it, without my consent or even telling me first.

What made it so hard for me to decide earlier was the tensions from the YWAM side that were pulling me. But after the stuff were booked, all those tensions were just gone. In the name of too-late-ness. Joseph Chean didnt say any more about it. neither did my team. My mom didnt bother to meet up with him anymore to sort things out with him since i have decided to go on the trip. In turn, Jospeh didnt bother too. Maybe the air between them was clearer than i thought. Either that or clearing the air on this issue isnt much a concern to both parties.

So thats it, the decision is made at last. I feel at peace about it. I am going to Japan on 13th august (not a very good idea for me to spend this day on the plane but no choice) and would be missing out the treasure hunting and many days of outreach in Go-fest. I should be thankful i get to attend all the conference days, though.

This week flew by superly fast. Before i knew it another week has passed. Its a good thing when time flies fast that i am able to identify where the time went to - indicating it was well spent. The week's time was largely spent on hosting the Oxford DTS team - Americans and canadians doing their DTS in new zealand. Singapore YWAM would be their first stop for their outreach, which subsequently moves on to malaysia, thailand , vietnam, nepal, and jerusalem. Being in the hospitality team, we would be the ones taking care of and attending to them.

Monday was doing housekeeping in the rooms that they would be staying in, then going to the airport to welcome them when their flight comes in. A really amusing incident happened here -that we were still happily chatting away in the office, looking at the Singapore map, when we suddenly realised that now was already their flight arrival time! We were supposed to be at the airport, at the correct gate, waving the welcome banners by this time. But instead we were still in the office.

We got into the car and sped the way there, and we prayed that the oxford team would experience delays, so that we would be able to welcome them in time, not ending up as they welcoming us instead.
God answered our prayers, even overdoing it... Late as we already were, waiting there, the oxford team still was not out yet, experiencing delays! they finally came out after about 15 mins of us waiting and guessing random people inside to be them.
The first encounter and introductions were quite awkward. They seemed less enthusiastic and open than would have been expected of Americans and canadians, in a circumstance like this. They needed some warming up to us, and vice versa.

We brought them to their accommodations in lorong 9, brought them to a coffeeshop for dinner, shopped in the supermarket, and even had them try some durians! All of them sportingly tried one, but only 3 of them said it was 'good' or 'not so bad'

Tuesday, did tea break for the oxford team, where we wanted to make ice lemon tea but forgot to bring the tea bags! nobody there had tea bags. Had to instead get teh-O from the coffeeshop.
Brought them on orientation session around singapore, showing them little india and geylang serai. They tried whole lot of indian food, especailly loved the chicken briyani, and ate till they were full - not part of the plan. We watched a live Hindu ritual in the temple too.
At geylang serai, they were all full from indian food already, so we didnt get to eat malay food. all we did was go around the geylang serai market to see.

Wednesday, did another round of napfa, which i quit after failing to get silver for pull-ups. not gonna waste time doing the remaining stations and 2.4km run, since i had graduation ceremony later in the afternoon. Officially graduated from SP now, though ive felt like i already graduated 3 months ago. Too bad i didnt get silver this time - it really would have complimented my graduation and make it a much happier occasion. But still, there was sth to celebrate anyways.

Thursday, another tea break with yet another screw up - the cakes we put in the fridge the day before had gone missing! forutnately their morning session was dragged much longer and bought us enough time to finally find the cakes back. long story.
The rest of the day was spent preparing a great feast for dinner - celebrating 4 may-babies birthdays, a farewell for a YWAMer, and also a sending off party for the oxford team. Took us 5 hours and more than 5 people to prepare it.
So that was the oxford team's last activity before heading off to malaysia. theyll be back.

Friday was nothing much, just clearing up the rooms they oxford used, and having meetings. But time still flew by really quickly. Just like that, my whole week was spent with hardly any time for anything else. I think i would love this kinda lifestyle, provided there is some time off though.

Mutual Exclusivity

2010-05-09T00:49:00.000+08:00

To go or not to go?

Since i joined YWAM, i have been involved in the hospitality team for Go-fest asia. For now till the Go-fest starts in august 10 and continuing on till august 26, all of the work we are doing pointing towards this event. Right now we are preparing the ground, but activity level would surely increase as the time draws nearer.
At first, the concern was on me getting enlisted into the army before august, thus being a great pity that i wont really get to see the fruits of my labour in the event. But that obstacle has since been cleared when my friends enlisting in July received their letter, and i have not received any. The next intake would then be september, or later.

Now, another obstacle has surfaced, in the form of a great dilemma. My family had planned a 2 week long trip to japan, right smack in the time of the Go-fest conference and outreach (what a nice timing). The plan is to leave on the 12th, and return on the 22nd while my mom attends her corporate conference in Kobe from then on.
Change of timing for either conference is out of the question. so whatever it is, my mom has to be in Kobe on 22 aug. Going after or during the conference is also out of question, as my brother happens to start his university life on 23 aug (another nice timing).

The problem is, i can only be at one place at a time. Divided-we-stand technology has not been invented yet.

Either way i choose, it is a sacrifice. Both are great opportunities, and one of them has to go.
My parents are disappointed that this Go-fest has to come in the way and disrupt the holiday plans. They feel i should put family first, and just 'take leave' from YWAM, since i am 'entitled to do so because i am just volunteering and owe them no duty'. As my dad says, "the show will go on without you; nobody is indispensible." while my mom says," what if you got enlisted in july? it would be the same thing - you wont be able to go for the conference." it all shows that they have an impression of unimportance for YWAM, go-fest, and my role in it. I am not too sure about it myself, and cant say for it.
YWAM on the other hand points out that i have a responsibility, since i have chosen to join the team. the hospitality team is quite short of manpower, and every member counts a lot. That i am not sure too, and cant say for it.

Arguments for Japan trip
- it would be the first time going to japan for me and my brother.
- i personally really want to go to japan.
- an opportunity like this doesnt come by easily; my mom's part is all provided for by the company.
- we probably wont be going to japan again anytime soon.
- we had rarely been spending time together as a family, and even more rare going on a family holiday. we might need the revival that the trip could provide.
- the experience for my family during the trip might not be as good if i were not there.
- we could celebrate my birthday as a family during the holiday. from the past years, it has always been my family celebrating for me; not much from friends.
- go fest could turn out to be a disappointment. i might not learn much from it after all. much is still uncertain.

Arguments for Go-fest
- the go-fest is all we have been working for; to miss it is such a great pity and waste.
- i personally really want to attend the go-fest conference and outreaches.
- i have a responsibility as a hospitality team member, to look after the foreign teams.
- i would be letting my teammates down if i chose to go for holiday while they are working their guts out and i am not around.
- i could gain much from interacting with them; like making new international friends and learning new culture, which i enjoy.
- this go-fest could be a once-ina-lifetime opportunity for me.
- the japan trip could turn out to be a disappointment. things go wrong, have not much fun. much is still uncertain - very uncertain especially for a foreign country for the first time, free and easy.
- going to japan is expensive. help save money.

I need to know more. i feel like i have not enough knowledge and information to appropriately decide. i need to get a better idea of how the conference would turn out, what things i will be doing as hospitality team, what i would be involved in. I also need to know the itinerary for the japan trip, what fun stuff we would be doing there, how the family bonding opportunity would turn out.

I have been praying hard about it and also getting those around me to pray for me, and still i have received no hint of an answer. the decision always comes back to me, leaving me cyclically in dilemma. Now, my parents are already pressing me hard for a decision. They have to book the flight and hotels really soon. I am forced to choose a direction now, and take several steps in the dark into it. I just pray that the Lord's blessings be upon the decision i make.

Guided confusion

2010-05-01T19:27:00.000+08:00

Last night, i was met with a close shave from losing both my wallet and my handphone - the 2 items that i cant go out without. A number of factors were contributing to the incident, but i think the main culprit is the pair of pants i wore that i am almost growing out of; after gaining 6kg since the time i bought it.

Yesterday i had actually intended to go for the SJC AGM, but after work i very unexpectedly received a call telling me that Junting had a free ticket for Iron man 2 that he could give me. apparently the free tickets were from his mom's company. A newly released movie that i had been wanting to watch, for free - who could resist. So a group of 8 of us decided to pon AGM for the greater good - for free Iron man 2. haha.

The movie was ok but not as good as i had expected. but thats besides the point. back to the point... because of my tight pants, i had to take out my handphone and wallet from my pockets to ease the discomfort. i placed it in the seat drink holder, and continued watching the movie, not bothering about it. After the movie, i stayed a few minutes to see if theres anyhting after the credits; which took too long and my friends had already started to leave the theatre. I grabbed my laptop bag and rushed out to catch up, talking and commenting about the movie along the way to the bus stops or mrt station or carpark.

It took me all the time from making our way through the crowd from the 5th storey down the excalators to the ground floor and almost going out of the shopping mall before i realised i left those things behind!
So i rushed all the way back up to the cinema, clueless where to go. I had no idea at all which theatre it was, and neither did i know how to get in without going past the ticket checker and the crowd. it was a state of great confusion. Then i saw an 'exit only' door and went in, hoping to retrace my exitting path from there.
It happens that that was the wrong exit door from where i came out from, and it took me to the corridor of theatres. Now i had to find out which theatre it was. I saw one which was open and had a few people in it, playing 'kick ass' advertisements.

Though there wasnt really anything to convince me that it was the right theatre, i confidently went in, down to the place where i sat earlier, and to my great relief and delight, there my hp and wallet was, camouflaged in the black seat pocket.
It might sound like nothing much; but to me, it was a frantic time, and i was very lucky in how it was resolved.

Other updates, i am no longer staying at home most of the time, being bored and doing nothing much - i have since joined YWAM as a volunteer in the Go-fest team. I would say, though we get no salary or provisions, im sure i would be much happier working here than finding a job in a corporate company. The environment, the culture is just so different for the better.
Would i devote myself full-time to the Lord's service in the future? Right now i dont think so, but that is a possibility i do not rule out.

Meaningless living

2010-04-18T22:00:00.000+08:00

Every saturday, my dad would bring my grandparents over to our place to spend a day away from their own home - an old 2 room hdb flat, where they are taken care of by my parents (sometimes i have to give a share of effort too) instead of a paid neighbour during the rest of the week. My mom would cook them proper meals for lunch and dinner; an old folks diet that i would have to eat too.

My grandmother is senile and cant even remember who i am. my grandfather is still mentally sound but physically he looks like he could breakdown anytime. When they come to my place, they spend the day doing nothing but eat, sleep, and watch TV - which i dont think they even absorb anything from it.

I could imagine how they spend the rest of their time at home.
Wake up, stare into space, watch some TV, eat breakfast and lunch, take a nap, watch more TV, eat again, stare blankly again, then go back to sleep.
They cant go out - never on their own. maybe the neighbour would bring them.
they cant hold proper conversations - my grandma would talk about the same things like a faulty tape recorder, and my grandpa hardly talks, even before he became hard of hearing.

The difficult part comes when i try to put myself in their shoes. I so absolutely cannot imagine myself living a life like that... a life totally void of meaning. They just live for the sake of staying alive. Its a fate worse than death.
Its commendable how they can continue living like that without falling into depression. I really dont understand.

I am certain that i would not become like them one day. Seeing their example makes me all the more concerned about preparing for my twilight years - even though those days are too far to even consider. Ill make sure i have active ageing, and even in my final years, to contribute to society in one way or another, being a blessing to people around me. Lest i live a life worse than no life at all.

ill informed decision

2010-04-08T22:57:00.000+08:00

Today i had my medical review at CMPB. purpose of which is to address a condition i had mentioned before during medical screening - ADHD. i had already intended to trivialise the problem as much as possible, because i was quite sure it wont enable me a down-pes. so do away with the unnecessary self-degradation.
my mom had to go down too, as required by the doctor to have an interview.

so we went in to have the interview together with the doctor... or rather a psychiatrist. had general questioning about the condition and how it affects me. we didnt make a big matter of it, because it was a small matter after all.

But then suddenly i was posed with a surprising choice - the doctor gave me a choice to remain in pes A, or be downgraded to pes C. temporarily, he said; but i doubted they would bother to change me out once im in. Just on the account of ADHD in my case, he said it actually does not constitute a down pes. but he was just being lenient and offering me a choice. sounds like a rare opportunity.
but he refused to give us detailed information about what pes A and C roles are like. i was forced to make a decision right then using all the little i knew. and in the end, i gave a decision. I chose to remain in combat roles. My mum had nothing more to say, and just kept quiet. no need to speak up for me to be downpesed. end of discussion.

Upon leaving the room, she immediately began pummeling me with doubts about my choice.
Are you sure you want to do combat roles? Do you know what youre in for? Are you sure you can do it? what if ......? why dont you wanna do pes C?
She obviously thinks pes C is much better... easier life, more benefits.

when my dad was told about this, he too began putting doubts in me. more or less along the same lines. they both think i made a foolish choice and wasted a good opportunity. after taking in all their doubts, i then too begin to worry if i had made an ill informed decision that i would regret for the coming 2 years.

Well, the decision has been made, probably no turning back. come what may. God has given me a healthy body; i should make the best use of what i am given, instead of giving in to a down-pes when i dont deserve one, just for the sake of some comfort. i believe life would be more exciting in the combat field, albeit less comfortable. what wont kill me will make me stronger!

Im sure the army wont let me suffer beyond my means... neither would God.

Life goes on

2010-04-05T23:14:00.000+08:00

Ok now, so im back from my trip to shanghai. actually i have been back already 3 days ago. Basically i would say, I really enjoyed my time there. of course, it would have been nowhere as good if not for my friends there. it was a refreshing different kind of experience that i never had before - going to a foreign place on my own; free and easy, staying at a friend's house, and having local friends to be my tour guides; visiting not so much touristy areas but more insider views of local life. - the learning opportunities are way better and abundant than when going on a mindless package tour. furthermore, staying with a local family and joining them in their daily life grants me the best and authentic exposure to local culture. I would love to have every holiday in this way, but such chances are hard to come by. i am thankful for this opportunity.

My sentiments of shanghai~
I wouldnt say shanghai is developed, but it is noticeably developing at a very fast rate - seemingly too fast for the place to keep up with it. (might be confusing)
after seeing observing shanghai, i realised that others feel Singapore is so clean and beautiful actually because Singapore constantly renovates, renews and maintains its urban landscape; as compared to Shanghai which hardly renovates its public areas or buildings - sometimes resulting in an old and ugly scene.

Goods and services in Shanghai is more expensive than most other parts of China, yet it is still significantly cheaper than Singapore's. Housing is very expensive though (considering their average wages), as it is quite a big squeeze in the city.

My foremost sentiment is that Shanghai is a good place to visit and experience comfortably; it has a sufficient infrastructure like the transport system. whatever you need there, you can get it. However, Shanghai is not a place i would want to live in. it demands so much more to live in this city. high cost of living, low purchasing power, rapid development, congestion, heavy pollution. i would not see myself living long-term in such a place.

My account of the Shanghai trip is still being worked on on the other blog as one whole long post. might take some time, but motivates me to get it done. the sketches i made while i was there would help me much.

八天在上海

2010-03-22T20:34:00.000+08:00

In just 2 more days time, i shall be leaving for Shanghai, to spend 8 days in homestay!
it would be my first time travelling alone, until i get to the airport at least. but everythings pretty much set and i dont really have to worry about anything.
after all, my friend in Shanghai has offered to give me 包吃包住包导游. haha
包住 is for sure, cause im staying at her house. ill try my best not to be a freeloader though.
包导游 is the main reason that i chose to go there. i wouldnt know where to go and how to go otherwise. this is a good time that we're both free.
包吃 would not be necessary. bleh. ill pay for my own meals.

this is gonna be so much better than a tour package. though such an arrangement is usually hard to get. thanks be to God for this opportunity.
i should be able to meet up with some other Shanghainese friends there. Time to revisit the friends ive made in Disney!
i very much hope that the ties ive made during the Disney program would be lasting relationships. perhaps this trip would be one big step in maintaining them. :)

Nuffah

2010-03-19T22:15:00.000+08:00

with the scores i have after 2 tries of napfa, i am now only 12-seconds-of-running away from a silver - and my 2 months exemption.

the 2 tries of napfa happened on no other than today and yesterday. having napfa on 2 consecutive days doesnt sound like a good idea, but today is the last chance to do it in school. so just to give this last chance a shot with whatever i got; hoping to do better somehow, i dragged myself to school this morning with my aching muscles from the previous day's strain... to get myself strained even more.

the results for today clearly showed i needed a rest. every station deproved significantly - with the exception of sit n reach, where i mysteriously became a lot more flexible overnight. and that was what i needed, cause i previously failed sit n reach by just 1cm.

2.4km rum
yesterday - 12min 42s
today - 13min 15s

shuttle run
ytd - 10.1 sec (A)
today - 11.6 sec (way failed)

broadjump
ytd - 228cm
today - 221cm

sit-ups
ytd - 30 truly, and my partner helped me cheat to 35
today - 25 truly, cheated up to 39 ... and the tester simply believed.

sit and reach
ytd - 36cm
today - 42cm - already a big increase by itself. but for some reason, the tester recorded it as 49cm! weird, but cool

chin ups
ytd - 5 on the second try
today - 1, excluding 2 voids.

but its not all over - there are still many chances to come, at the toa payoh stadium. with all the other stations settled, now i just have to focus on running. my silver seems so near, yet so far.
i believe i will acheive it eventually. but even if i dont, the extra 2 months wont be too bad.

Extraordinary timeout

2010-03-12T01:25:00.000+08:00

Call it divine appointment. as for me, i guess it was.

The jym timeout set on Thursday 11 march at 9pm was initially intended to be done together at Dappen's place as part of the Acacia (and, unknown to me, combined with myrtle) cell outing.
However, at the stroke of 9pm, half of the people present perpared to leave, and said they would do their timeout on the way home. (highly doubtful they did, or that it was of quality) it was as if everyone was intentionally defying the official timeout period.
i would have stayed and looked for a quiet spot to do my timeout too, if not for someone bugging me to leave too...

so oh wells. the plan to do timeout there failed. next plan was to do it somewhere downstairs my condo.
but in an unfortunate event, being distracted as i alighted the bus, i discovered that i had left my bag of stuff (containing cards and souvenirs) on the bus! it was too late; the bus sped off just as i wanted to make a dash back in.
i thought of hailing a cab and immediately asking the driver to overtake the bus, but i didnt wanna go through that cost and trouble. so i just took the next bus and follow all the way to the terminal, hoping to find that bus and my bag.
i was hesitant. the ride would be long. it wasnt that those stuff were very important. but since i was free and wanted some 'adventure', i just went for it, taking that little chance of getting my stuff back. on top of my mind, i was also considering creating a good opportunity for doing the timeout.

the bus took a long boring ride all the way to Hougang. and the worse part is, i didnt do my timeout during the whole ride.
reaching the interchange, quite as i expected, there was nothing left on the bus, and nothing turned in to lost and found. someone must be enjoying my monopoly deal, las vegas deck and Disneyworld accessories now.

taking the last mrt train back, i stopped at orchard, and found that my direct bus from there was no longer running - i missed the last bus by like 15 mins.
i didnt think much about what am i to do next or worry about how to get home... i just did my timeout there alone at the bus stop. it was a very indescribable, peaceful feel.

halfway through, i received a call from my mom, interrupting my timeout. she asked why i wasnt back so late; i told her my story, and without me requesting anything, my dad offered to make a trip down to fetch me at that midnight hour. and so he did.
i continued my timeout until he reached about 15 mins later. i got more than what i asked for - im sure it was a much more meaningful and somewhat exciting timeout than what i would have otherwise gotten.

as for those stuff i lost, i wish for the finder to enjoy them to the full.

Realisations

2010-02-28T02:13:00.000+08:00

I realised that Singapore is one of the only countries in the world where in most cases, English is our first language; and our mother tongue is our second language.

--------------------------------

I have come to realise today, after living with it for so long, how awfully annoying a certain personality trait in my family can be. My mom doesn’t have much of it, but my dad certainly does. And when i thought about it, I came to the dreadful realisation that i have often been guilty of it too. I have probably been influenced and picked up this trait at home, and it didn’t seem so bad to me until now.

I have to break away from this, and divert from what I’ve been influenced with. But how easy is it to change from something that has already come to seem so natural to me? I’ve been ‘taught’ this way, and don’t really know how to go about it otherwise. I guess, ill just have to do it slowly a step at a time, starting with unfreezing...

2010-02-24T21:57:00.000+08:00

The response from a Brazilian friend when i told her im going into the army soon:

"WHAT?!!!!!!
ENLIST IN SINGAPORE ARMY?!!!
Why?!!!
Do you want to go to the war? Do you want to die?
Are you going to have a good life?"

Haha. She must have had many bad experiences hearing stories about the Brazil army.

Battle of boredom

2010-02-22T13:56:00.000+08:00

Boredom is becoming a big feature in my life these days. Ever since returning from a life where there was so much to do in so little time, i just cant stand the lack of activities that i am facing now. So i would try to come up with things to do, but ironically i would later be too lazy to do many of them. the very undesirable result is that time just wastes away - probably in front of the computer playing games, surfing the web or looking at whatever momento i have of Disneyworld.

I am currently left with a huge amount of time... at least 3 months, before i get enlisted into the army. i still dont know when i am enlisting by the way. A few dates for activity are marked out on my calendar, widely spaced out. still lots of spare time in between. I certainly do not feel like taking up another part time job because it would hinder my freedom to attend those activities or put another activity on my calendar without worring about a clash with work. (of course thats not the only reason)

it would be ideal if i could find something that can effectively fill up those empty time spaces while still allowing me much freedom for fixed activities. or at least, fill them up with more fixed activities.
I miss the times in Disneyworld, where a trip to the parks would easily be a solution any day!

Expedition Railway

2010-02-15T22:25:00.001+08:00

I do not know how this is gonna go, but im gonna try this.

My plan is to attempt a journey by foot along the malayan railway track, all the way to where it ends! The entire track spans about 24km, from the woodlands checkpoint all the way to the train terminal in the south of Singapore.

My place (Springdale) happens to be in a very nice position - next to the tracks, in the middle of the stretch. therefore a trip north or a trip south would both be about 12km.

instead of going the entire 24km which would probably be too exhausting for me, ill first try the trip southwards, and the same route back if i have the energy and feel like it.

im sure there will be lots to see along the way, different terrains and passing many familiar locations, and of course a few trains too. they're really easy to avoid when they come.

i intend to do this sometime within the next few weeks. anyone game to join in?

No place like home

2010-02-09T23:32:00.000+08:00

Its been 2 days now since landing back here in my homeland once again
Though the past 5 months in USA was the time of my life, I would have to say, there is still no place like home.
as Mickey Mouse says: "cause after all, home is where the heart is."

first thing i noticed that i wasnt used to - the weather! ahh i cant stand the heat now.
what i missed most in Singapore - the food! One may never appreciate the blessing of living in this food heaven until he has lived in USA.

It seemed like i had just awoken from a dream, and everything seems all so familiar again. In a really strange phenomenon - when i was in USA, i felt like i havent been home for ages. but once i came back, it seemed i was here just a short while ago. it all came back to me instantly - immediate assimilation back into the life i once knew, and putting the Disneyworld lifestyle away at once. but of course, i have taken back much from the experience and been changed in some ways... if not that would be a really sad case.

now there is so much time ahead of me before i get enlisted. would require a good amount of planning and discipline to be using all these time wisely.

Counting the days

2010-02-02T13:57:00.000+08:00

Just 5 more days remain before my return back to my motherland!
the day and time would be Sunday 7th feb, 12.55pm SG time, estimated arrival in Changi airport. should i go to jym?... a thought to consider.

It seems so unreal.. Ill be back into the whole environment that ive once lived in but been separated from for 4 months - it seems like such a short time that i was away in the US, yet it seems like so long since ive been in Singapore.
My memories of Singapore have somewhat 'dulled' by now, and i dont know what to expect when i return back again. Surely life will be really different

This holiday has acted as a sort of 'purgatory' between the end of my Disney life and back into my Singaporean life; somehow dulling the lines and preventing such a sharp transition like there was when i came here. i guess, that is good.

But theres no doubt, its good to be home, and im looking forward to it.
ill be seeing everyone again real soon!

New York, New York

2010-01-27T02:52:00.000+08:00

My time in Disney has ended. Just 4 days ago, and im already missing it... the place, the lifestyle, the people. Since then i have been in New York, and experiencing a great 'environment shock' from how different NY is from orlando, or even Singapore. Especially during that unforgettable moment of coming up from the subway into Times Square, was when the greatest shock set in.
It is such an unimaginably bustling city that Singapore cant compare to.

During my time in NY, we have covered quite a number of places, just barely enough to cover the cost of the $130 New York Pass. they include:

Empire state building observatory - on a balcony 82 storeys above, i witnessed a beautiful view of the whole New York city (and beyond) at night. while day time would have been better for landmark and activity watching, the night view is beautifully dazzling with city lights.

Rockefeller tower - similar to the observatory, i went up the Rockefeller tower for a good view of NYC.

NBC studios tour - held at the Rockefeller tower, we were brought on a short tour of the NBC studios, with explaination of filming processes and the complications involved.

Musuem of natural history - the scene of 'night at the museum', but couldnt find any of the display pieces that were in the show. the place looks similar, but the movie clearly had their own studio with their own art pieces for it.

Metropolitan museum of art - featuring ancient artifacts from civilations all over the world.

Museum of modern art - modern art displays. mostly boring, but some were interesting stuff

Museum of sex - save the explaination. it got quite pornographic sometimes.

Madame Tussauds wax museum - really cool museum... it had life size wax figures of hundreds of celebrities and famous figures, which all looked extremely real. good place to take photos and have fun.

Da Vinci's workshop - all the art pieces and sketches he made, depicted in greater clarity.

Circle line cruise - cruising along the manhattan river, going past the Statue of Liberty and under bridges. What would have been a fantastic photo taking experience, our experience was so spoiled by the heavy rain that greatly reduced visibility and disallowed us to stop at Liberty Island.

Bronx Zoo - A really, really pitiful experience. A world accclaimed zoo as advertised, turned out to be like a cold deserted park, featuring a few inactive animals, barren trees, frozen pools, and closed shops everywhere. Imagine what would happen if Disney Animal Kingdom became that cold...

Those were just the attractions we visited using our NY pass to gain free entry. Central park, Battery park and the area around Times Square are among the other places visited.
Tomorrow is heading off to San Francisco! I would think, the sights are even better there!

It's a wrap!

2010-01-22T00:28:00.000+08:00

My program in Disneyworld has officially come to an end.
the last day of work is over. goodbyes have been said, pictures taken, namecards and signatures exchanged, lots of tears shed (though none from me)
everything we need here bought, thankfully all attractions covered
now the biggest task ahead and still left undone is.. packing up.

As i speak.. or write, i am in the midst of packing up, and so is everyone in the apartment. the whole apartment is in an awful mess, with everything being flushed out of the drawers and onto the floor abd tables. hard to imagine, in a few hours time it would be all cleared up, and the warzone becoming a nice, neat apartment again.

Meanwhile the reality still hasnt much sank into me that in several more hours time, i would be out of this place and never returning again, as far as i can see. The same scenario as when i was leaving to come here. Perhaps when i return after my 2 weeks of holidaying, it would seem like just one long dream.
Away from all my friends here, away from Patterson Court and the other housing properties, away from Magic Kingdom, hollywood studios, Epcot and Animal Kingdom. Away from Pecos Bills. not that i really liked the place - the environment isnt good, neither is the food, there is not one good manager, just 1 good coordinator, and the policies & practices there portray lack of reasoning and concern for cast members. Only the cast members there are good... well of course!

I dont feel ready to go. But time doesnt wait for me, and when the time is up, ill just have to be out of here whether im ready or not.
So off to packing i go ... and soon i will be home!

A very late first post of the year

2010-01-13T10:57:00.000+08:00

A (very belated) happy new year to all! it has to be so belated cause there was no chance before that to do it on this blog. yes i admit it is due to laziness, cant be botheredness, forgetfulness and tiredness in combination to not having the time.

Above is the video of the 2010 New Year countdown event at the Magic Kingdom, featuring a totally awesome fireworks spectacular "fantasy in the sky". Yes, thats where i spent the first hour of the year. Of course, i was working the whole day on the last day of 2009, but i purposely arranged that i would be able to see and video tape the fireworks. Noodle station changed my schedule to work till 12.30 without my permission, but i cleared it up with the manager who then let me off at 11.30, just having enough time to get to Main Street with camera ready, and so happens also bumping into a group of colleagues. it was a real worthwhile choice to cross the new year that way ~ the only bad part is that it was so overcrowded along the whole main street, and i could hardly get a good view with my camera without being blocked by tall people in front wearing those stupid party hats. oh i was so pissed when they started blowing the horns and waving those hats in front of my camera while taping the fireworks!

It was a mad 2 weeks of work, totalling 69 hours on christmas week, followed by 80 hours on new years week. but right after that, it took a steep dive down to 32 in the next week. that went further lower to 25 when i called-in one day to go to play. I totally lost my mood to work right after new year's week. a 180 degrees turn - from maximising my hours, taking every chance of extension and searching the hub every now and then for extra shifts to fill up every hour available; to not even thinking about extending, and even calling in for one day.

Everyone else had the same absence of mood for work, i could see. and it was totally understandable - a batch of cast members ended their program on jan 2; immediately after new year week, followed by a larger batch on jan 8. quite a number of good friends left on that day, including my housemate cum colleague, Yasuhito. Who would want to work at this kind of time, when things are so soon coming to an end? Those who were leaving spent the last week (and perhaps some time during New year week too) playing and hanging out all they could, while they still could. And those who arent leaving yet, like me, spent the time accompanying them, while we still could. might as well treat it as our final chances to play too ~ for my turn to leave aint far away at all either.

It was quite an emotional time spending those last moments with the departing folk. we said we would visit each other in each other's countries, but i challenge that to come to pass. even maintaining regular contact is doubtful, from prior experience. Really, it seemed like their departure was separation for good.

Now, i am faced with a terrifying fact - i have only 9 days remaining here, and my very last off day is over. from now till the end, i am working every day. that leaves me with not much remaining opportunity at all to play and hang out, considering that the massive task of PACKING UP still remains undone, to be juggled within these work days. oh my, what a doomed state im in... it all seems too late now. Lord help me...

Christmas blues

2009-12-25T12:02:00.000+08:00

ok, i finally found some time amidst the christmas week madness. today is my day off.

the time now is 10.57 pm on christmas eve
i am sitting alone on my bed
with my laptop as my only company and source of activity
slow, soothing tunes of 'O Holy Night' instrumental is playing on windows media player
lights dimmed and christmas decorations lighted up
outside the air is cold and wind makes it all the more chilly
but inside the apartment it is warm and cosy
christmas presents are piled up under the small chistmas tree
waiting to be exchanged in an hours time in our Secret Santa activity
Im feeling a little lonely, while everyone is out working or enjoying.
i should decide, this is the best time and setting to spend with God
to commemorate the whole meaning and utmost significance of Christmas
For God so loved the world, He gave His one and only begotten son.

Thank you, Lord, for Jesus.

Christmas rush

2009-12-20T23:28:00.000+08:00

christmas, christmas time is here
time for work and time for tears

nah, its not that bad. but the fact is that it gonna be a super mad rush at the parks this week (as it already was during the later part of last week)
i am scheduled for a shocking 68 hours of work this week!
and that number is sure to increase with a couple of extensions and maybe extra shifts
yes, this is the best time to work and worst time to play
(you might think, isnt festive times the best times to play?)
not when your company consists people who have to work like mad too during this period

5 good reasons to work to the max this week
1. because of the high amount of scheduled hours, any extra hours will be overtime pay!
2. its the easiest time to get extra hours, since demand is high of course
3. its a bad idea to go to the parks to play during this week, and squeeze in with the huge crowd and have long waiting times for attractions
4. there will be hardly anyone around to celebrate with - everyone will be at work most of the time
5. everyone will be at work, so the workplace is the right place to spend time, with the company of all colleagues!

so here's to my mad week of work. starting in 2 hours time. im sure ill survive. the question is, how far can i push it?

Day Trip, Miami!

2009-12-12T10:31:00.000+08:00

One simple remark could sprout a seed of desire lying dormant for ... perhaps 3 months.
It all started with me casually saying to Vicky one day, " if you are going to Miami some time, remember to call me along!"
and then just a few days later, she organised a trip to Miami!
yay, it was my idea

'Rise and shine' was not applicable on wednesday morning, 9 december, when we assembled at our estate entrances to await the chartered cab. even with the illogical implementation of Daylight Savings Time which makes the sun rise at about 6am and set at 6pm, we were waiting for the cab already before the sky was lit. i understand. setting it at this time was for best measure, so that by the time we get to Miami following a 4 hour long road trip, it would still be morning time, with a good amount of sunlight hours to spend there.

unfortunately, the cab driver was almost an hour late. i dont know if it was his culture or what, but he acted like it was all OK and didnt even acknowledge that he was late. well, for one i know he spoke spanish. we didnt make a fuss, and just got on. perhaps we were too tired to bother. for most of my fellow trippers, it was a mere nap before coming. but for me, the 2 days were joined together by a late night at work, then some preparations for the trip (talk about cooking potatoes at 4am...) and then making my way off at 5+am. not a wink of sleep, and i couldnt wait to get some on the cab.

5 of us met at Patterson, and picked up another 4 at Vista Way and headed for Miami. 9 people fitting into a cab meant for 12 people. 12 Americans, to be more precise. the amount of space each of us had was very comfortable indeed. i could actually lie down inclined to sleep.

waking up 2 hours later by a dirty hand on my face and shaking me up, (i havent gotten back at her for that) i saw that we were still on the road, driving by countryside, and soon pulled over at mcdonalds for toilet break. still quite some more distance to go...

finally, when the countryside scenery changed into cityscape, we knew we were getting there. This is more like it! havent seen a building over 20 stories tall for 3 months already; the last one being the control tower at Changi airport. i couldnt help but feel that Miami is such a great difference for the better compared to the Orlando environment. A great treat for my eyes the place was.

First stop was the harbour. well actually a mall next to the harbour. not much shopping to do here, and we were only given 2 hours. looked at a few shops, decided nothing was of interest, and went on. took loads of photos of the irresistable harbour scenery, and settled down for some irresistable food for lunch overlooking the irresistable scenery.

Chilis restaurant. Mexican cuisine. heard much of it, seen much of it, but never really understood the variety they had, nor tried it. we all ordered different stuff. salads, tortillas, grilled chicken, tacos; with red beans and spice rice as the main carbohydrate. food was delightful. and so complemented by the surroundings. though not so delightful after the bill comes to $15 after tax and tips, for a miserable piece of margarita chicken on cheap red beans and spice rice. but hey, its all for the experience.

with a little bit of time left before the agreed meeting time, we took the city monorail and went in one round. didnt get off anywhere else - we just wanted to get some sightseeing and photo taking, and we got what we wanted, cause the views are great from the monorail.

then once again, the driver was late. urgh. we could have taken the monorail a second round with that time. for whatever good that may do.

then the driver took us to South Beach, supposedly the most famous and popular beach in America. clear blue waters, waves excellent for surfing, white soft sandy beaches, uninterrupted shoreline and an infinite expanse of sea across the horizon. i could understand why it would be so popular, even though it was not crowded at all when we went there; probably it was the blazing sun that turned them off. it was too sunny for comfort. The driver told us too that there is section for nude beachers, but we couldnt find it. only the beach birds were nude here.

Speaking of birds, the beach was infested with them. lots of seagulls everywhere, and also armies of these weird birds that i dont know what theyre called. they are literally like an army, moving around in groups and arranges themselves into formations. seagulls would fly and hover in mid air whenever someone would throw a morsel of bird feed into the air. for them it is their way of catching the food before it lands and becomes free for all to grab, but for the beachers it is for their entertainment.

we got bored. out of the 5 of us there at south beach, 3 were not in appropriate attire for swimming, and one that was didnt know how to swim. which left only ME to get into the waves and swim in the sea. not so fun alone, and also with the waves throwing me around and getting sand all over me. so we decided to take a walk along the shoreline, and at a chosen spot, decided to bury me. alive. the soft sand was just so comfortable to be buried in - i could just sleep that way! plus it was cool underneath and shielded me from the scorching heat.

when we had enough, we were taken next to a shopping mall. although i feel that shopping is such a waste of time and should not be done on a short holiday trip where we are not so bored and need to kill time. in the end, we hardly bought anything. just a totally unproductive time of window shopping. at least for consolation, we had nice christmas displays to see there. it is a grand and really nice looking shopping mall compared to those in Orlando, but pick any newer shopping mall in orchard road and it would be a fair fight.

little time was left before the scheduled time to depart, but we bought dinner to eat there. we learned from our lesson and gave the driver ample time to come. but this time, when it is time to go back, he was on time! so oh wells, we had to pack the food and he had to let us eat on board.
the day was ending, the sun was setting, and we made our way back to Orlando after a really short but memorable trip.

we were trying to make it back in time for the Winter Formal event, a disney event for cast members happening only once a year. but we arrived back late, and realized that by the time we wash up and transform from casual beach wear to formal and take the bus to the ball, it would be almost over. what a waste. but any ways, im sure i would have chosen the Miami trip over the winter formal any time.

Now whats up next... Tampa Bay? heh.

Give Thanks

2009-12-02T03:43:00.000+08:00

For the past 9 days i have had hardly any time to go online and have some leisure time. 7 days went to the thanksgiving week, when like a miracle, i was scheduled for 55 hours as compared to the usual 30 - 35 hours. to add to it, i picked up extra shifts and had some extentions... even after the early release i had on wednesday to go for the thanksgiving party, i completed the week with 64 hours on the clock. and then to add to the miracle, i mysteriously had 7 hours of overtime pay added to my payroll! it was such a shock of delight. i earned almost as much as i would in 3 normal weeks.

the whole week of thanksgiving was really busy, cause its holiday time for the americans. a time for families to get together and spend some leisure time, and a time for those working in the leisure/entertainment businesses to be apart from their families, working their butts out to make the vacationers happy.

it was especially busy on thanksgiving day itself of course. a super mad rush on both sides of the counter. any mistake would be sure to cause some friction. guests filled up the whole restaurant from the counters queueing all the way back to the topping bar, and even almost outside the restaurant. and yet the guests willingly squeeze like sardines in a can and wait for half an hour just to get a meal, and then another half an hour waiting for a suitable table. it was a really eye opening sight. How much more it will be during Christmas day!

thanksgiving band

25th november there was the thanksgiving party at Patterson court. i expected it to be a really big event and i so didnt wanna miss it, so much until i was willing to give away 6 hours of overtime shift to a colleague just so i could go for it! turned out to be such a disappointment. all we had is a miserable portion of turkey ham to go with a scoop of potato, corn and cranberry jam. a limit of 1 serving per person! whats worse, the same meal was served at the magic kingdom cast cafeteria the next day for just $1!
mickey and donald were there at patterson too, open for us to take pictures with, but we were too lazy to wait in the long line. and there was live musical performaces, switching between a group of 4 choir singers (singing in 4 parts) and an instrumental band of 4, playing beautiful music like in the video posted. made the party a little more worth the time.

27th november... Black Friday! i have heard reports on black fridays that it is such a mad rush at shoping centres that every shop and walkway is packed and people would be trying to squeeze in between each other, rush for the good deal, and sometimes even trample to death anyone who happens to fall to the ground. transport would be really expensive to go to anywhere outside for shopping, so i decided to just settle for the Orlando Premium Outlets within walking distance.

On thanksgiving day, the morning and afternoon was spent at work and hanging around in the magic kingdom. upon returning home, i realised i was locked out because my keys were missing and everyone was out! i finally found 1 classmate who was home at another block. another 2 came, intending to go out soon for shopping at Orlando premium outlets. just nice! so i joined in with them. at least i wasnt stuck and alone the whole night - that would be the most pitiful thanksgiving day!
started walking around and looking at the good deals at 10pm, and come 12 midnight, all the shops opened and people rushed in. there was a large crowd there at OPO (mainly disney cast members, for obvious reasons) and they seem to be mad for good deals. some shops had hardly any customers, and at other shops, there would be people queueing outside for hours for a chance to get in to shop. the Coach store had lines outside extending 30 metres outside, and there was a queue all the time from midnight to afternoon. the good deal? designer bags and purses that go down to as low as a third of original price.

as for me, i avoided too long queues, and spent about $200 on shopping... my record expenditure in one trip! some people continued on from there on to other shopping locations for part 2 of shopping. but ive had enough, and was totally exhausted.

On black friday night, we finally had the chance to gather 7 out of 22 of us classmates, and had a home cooked thanksgiving dinner together, featuring a baked whole turkey! it was just $21 from walmart, and it was absolutely delicious. i think turkey meat owns chicken, pork or beef meat. it fed us all till we were full, and still had 2 plates of meat left over.

saturday was the last week of long work days. from sunday onwards it was back to the pathetic 6 hours a day, 30 hours a week. ahh, it was like a whole different life, for just that one special week. Christmas week is the next to look forward to!

Address

2009-11-21T15:45:00.000+08:00

This is my address in USA
i know i should have posted it up much earlier.

8115 Patterson Woods Drive
apartment #12305
Orlando, Florida 32821

Do send me stuff if you can!

2009-11-15T16:26:00.000+08:00

Today is the halfway mark of my time here with Disney.
I am exactly halfway through my program.
Time check; it has been 68 days since i left Singapore.
and yes, 68 more days remain before my program ends. though it would be more than 68 days before i return to Singapore soil.
on one train of thought, so much has happened and i have experienced so much already during this 68 days. and there is yet another 68 days to come, where i can double the experience.
but on another train of thought, things are becoming routine and its more or less the same thing.
so actually i would expect to experience less new things in the next half than the first half.
but i would never know, what God may have in store for me.
i am confident there will still be much changes to take place, and more new experiences to come.

today at work, my coordinator went crazy. i dont know what happened to him, he is usually a really nice guy and he even attended the Mickey's christmas party in MK as a guest yesterday, with his friends. its funny to have your coordinator one day becoming your guest another day.
Today, he went extra hard on all the people doing closing. nitpikcing to the highest degree, and even giving us new tasks that closers are not normally supposed to do, such as scrubbing off the sauce stains from the underside of trash cans. we had to stay on for almost an hour extra before he finally let us go. but before we left, he actually told us all to help ourselves to the leftover cookies and carror cakes in the cooler! he's really gone crazy - he doesnt even have the authrority to authorize us taking the cookies and cakes, which would be normally be stealing of restaurant property. but we didnt care; all of us just rushed to grab some desserts and soon the trays were all empty. i finally got to try the carrot cake only now, even after seeing them everyday. its nice to have your coordinator go crazy sometimes. i hope he'll be fine soon.

Amazing Race: Disney world

2009-11-13T14:58:00.000+08:00

The time was 3.25. I had just come out of the learning center and went to the bus stop at Vista Way after doing an assignment; which was not finished, but i had to go to catch the 3.29 A bus to work. the bus would actually arrive at the magic kingdom at least half an hour before my shift at 4.30. but it happens that the next A bus to is during the shift-change period, so the next bus would take a long break at Vista Way before heading to MK and if i were to take that bus, i would be late.

So i turned up at the bus station on time. a few minutes spare of 3.29. but i did not see any A bus docked there like it usually would before leaving in a few minutes. i did however, see a bus in the A bus spot which had the sign "not in service" put up. i decided to honor the notice and did not board the bus. i saw another A bus behind, and i tried to board. the driver told me to wait a few minutes as checks was ongoing. when it was done, it went over to take the A bus spot where the bus supposedly 'not in service' was and just left. i tried going up the bus again, and this time the driver told me, "you wont wanna go up now. this bus aint leaving till another 40 mins time..."

i was shocked and confused. after a whole load of query and explainations, i discovered that the 'not in service' bus was actually the 3.29 A bus, and it was well in service! i ought to be so pissed with that stupid driver who doesnt even know how to display the correct signs. now i would have to take the next bus in 40 mins which would surely get me late.

or maybe not. i had to take the chance on an alternative tedious route which i had never tried before, but seemed feasible and get me there on time. the plan was to take the C bus to the Epcot, then take a shuttle bus from there to the magic kingdom.

So off i went in the C bus, arriving at Epcot at 3.55. not as time effective as i thought... 35 minutes remaining to get to my workplace. and i was only at the cast member entrance. from there, i had to run to the main entrance of Epcot to supposedly take the bus. that was when i realised that i could take the monorail instead which would be much faster! a blessed relief.

at 4.05 i boarded the monorail at Epcot. but it was not going straight to MK; it would stop at TTC near MK, and i would have to change monorail. aint sounding so good now. the minutes felt like hours as i watched the monorail make its way across, and wishing it would speed up.

as i arrived at TTC at 4.15, i noticed the monorail headed for MK had just arrived too. it was just a few metres away, but to get inside, i would have to go down the station, and up the other entrance.
the doors opened and everyone got out. as i rushed out towards the other monorail, i found my path being blocked my a fat american and his kid, walking slowly and totally oblivous to the people behind him. i shouted 'excuse me!', and it took him a few seconds to make way. then i dashed over to the MK monorail and just as i was a few metres away, the doors closed and it went off! frustration level was extremely high now.

taking a minute to cool down, i then decided to give up and intercept the A bus which would get me late; from TTC. but just as i was going out of the station, the next monorail arrived. revert to original plan. so at 4.18, i was on the monorail to MK.

i was totally not confident of making it in time. after reaching MK, i would still have to make my way to Pecos Bills, somehow within 12 minutes time.
monorail reached magic kingdom at 4.24. 6 minutes remaining. i ran from the monorail station to the main entrance, swiped my card, passed through security check, and by then the time was 4.26. i ran as fast as i could, breezing my way down main street USA, past the crowd of more fat americans but somehow maneouvering my way past and between them, then into liberty square and then frontierland. dashed into Pecos Bills and the onstage entrance where i am not allowed to be without my full costume but i just couldnt be bothered.

and at exactly 4.30, i reached the CDS terminal and clocked in.

I MADE IT! JUST ON TIME!!

whew. what an unforgettable adventure.

ive come this far.

2009-11-04T13:04:00.000+08:00

oops, i did it again... this the second time i fell asleep accidentally while using the laptop on my bed, and in my sleep i kicked the laptop off the bed, landed in quite an awkward position... thankfully its still all right. ive been tired lately.

Whats up? this blog is so dead. i thought it should be better when im away over here, but its the other way round. really, it seems like i have slacked off from life.
basically that means, life here getting more boring and meaningless.

time really flies. by the end of this week, i would have been here for 2 months already!
its like oh my gosh, i look back and realise that so many days has passed since i last did a certain thing or another, and i wonder where has all the time in between went to. seriously, this monotony and monochromity of my life here has destroyed the value and essence of time.
maybe a to-do list with deadlines would do me alot of good.

this is especially so when a week is no longer a cycle, but a string of undifffentiated days interlinked with other weeks, each being 7 days long. ie, a week is now merely a unit of time measurement.

recent events?

halloween horror nights at universal studios! ticket was rather expensive and not worth considering we spent half the time waiting in queue to get into the attraction, especially for SAW which took almost an hour. the random movies skit was really good though. a very different experience, but i wouldnt say its very good. i would choose disney hollywood studios over it.

Give Kids the World halloween party, at GKTW village. i really like the village, it has the very fairy taleish and kiddy feel but that is different from magic kingdom. that was a volunteer activity i have to do to write about it in my assignment (so lame, making it compulsory to volunteer). i think the party and the task i did during the event was boring. party was too short and not enough meaning. my task... just picking up bean bags so that the next kid can throw again. haha. but to tell the truth, i think the GKTW village is a very nice place that i would love to spend more time at. if only there would be better activities...

spotlight on fairytale weddings, learning opportunity. this time not held at disney university, but at the wedding pavilion. great opportunity to explore the neigbouring area to the magic kingdom. never knew this side of it, and realised it is extremely beautiful - the Grand Floridian resort, the wedding pavilion and the surroundings. it was a good time for some quiet reflection and relaxation, sitting on the floating bench and sleeping under an umbrella on the beach. its a very dreamy place to get married, but you really gotta be dreaming when the cost could come up to like $100,000!

looking at the time ahead, things arent seeming to get better. i am still getting the worst schedules ever like the past 3 weeks. everyday i work the closing or near-closing shifts, and is always only 6 hours per day. its like already going into mid november! surely it should be busier now! surely there must be some other factor somewhere, messing it all up. i am getting sick and tired of this crappy schedules.
and then also came the big disappointment about not being able to go for the royal caribbean cruise to Bahamas, when some of my friends are, and most have gone already.

this program is a school of hard knocks. hopefully the knocking awakes me to good purpose, and not injuring me instead. as revealed during the reflection, the opportunities gone and regrets i have during this program is just like a handful of stones from the wedding pavilion tossed into the lake, with still so much more remaining.

a little thought

2009-10-24T22:10:00.000+08:00

I'll take whatever the world gives me. cause ultimately it is also what God choose to give me according to His plan which i would want to follow.

defining contentment,
"contentment is the realisation that God has provided everything that i need for my present happiness"

Yes, God may have denied me of may things that i want, but thinking it through, i do have everything i need. I can be happy with the way i am or how things are now. if only i stop comparing myself to others, or how things could have been better. its hard, but it would take some getting used to.

after all, it is better to be content with little, than to gain much just to satisfy your desire.

Shroud of Breeze

2009-10-18T22:34:00.000+08:00

It all started with a rain in the night. that doesnt happen very often. it hardly even rained at all. at least 5 times less than singapore. i dont know if that is the cause or not, but the next morning, it finally felt like autumn in america.

in a very sudden change of climate, the air temperature dropped from a usual 27ish degrees to about 20 in the morning. a huge drop in temperature already. but still nice, like aircon. then at night, it dropped from a usual 24ish to 12 degrees! i would usually go outside to the balcony to warm up if the aircon gets cold. but this time i go outside only to be met with a blast of cold air many times colder!

its like some spell has been cast upon Orlando that suddenly turned it from summer to winter overnight... even as i speak, i feel the chill seeping through the closed windows and chilling the room. today's temperature is estimated to be 9 degrees... my goodness.

last night we went out for supper at ihop, we had to walk to take the bus and walk somemore from there. and though we were in jackets, it was still freezing. especially with continuous wind. going up the warm bus, we could feel ourselves defrosting... and after eating, we felt like just camping over at the restaurant so to not have to make the trip back in the coldness.

surely it is the sudden wind that brought this shroud of frost to this temperate land. i dont know which direction though... probably the east wind from the atlantic. winds are sure getting stronger. perhaps soon i would experience gales, and maybe even hurricanes! florida is known for its hurricanes. i think it would be cool if i could experience one firsthand!

Oversleeping has really got the better of me this time. And this time its even more dumb... forgetting to set the timer. With a class from 8am to 11 and a social security collection from 8 to 10 which i intended to do and be late for class, i woke up at freaking 10.20! it’s like i just missed everything! Plus the class today was very important as there was to be a 5% test to be done in class, and an important topic taught. Im so screwed this time. Oversleeping totally sucks!

Interesting facts & events cont'd

2009-10-09T23:52:00.000+08:00

Finally, my full collection of state quarters is complete! for more than a week that elusive Maine coin has been avoiding me and leaving my collection incomplete.
then last night, i bought something from the dispenser machine. i got back 5 cents change. i realised i had 2 dimes in my wallet, so i combined them all into a quarter. then trying to get a coin for my 2nd collection, i exchanged that quarter several times. after so many futile tries, i decided to just take the next coin and go.
So i did, and lo and behold, the coin was.. Maine.

2 days ago, one of my colleagues got terminated from the program because he accumulated 3 property offences... the last one was because he signed in another colleague as visitor to his apartment, but she failed to leave by 1am. both of them gets an offence.
termination is like such a serious and big deal. all of us colleagues were so concerned for him and threw a farewell party for him which i didnt go. (actually its more like a termination party cause he aint leaving.). immediately after being terminated, all his IDs are being confiscated so that he cannot take any disney bus, enter any park or even his apartment except to pack up and leave. he cant stay over at any of the disney apartments either.

now he is looking for a place to stay nearby, like rent an apartment or sth. his good friend roommate is also going to move out of the disney apartment and join him there, but continue to work in disney until the end of the program. he has a car so its possible. such is the great convenience. but being faced with such a big sum to fork out at once, several of us colleagues actually donated money to help them out. Only now did i realise that my group of colleagues is such a tight knit community.

even during the operating day, the restaurant faces very fluctuating demand... during the lunch hour all the counters are opened, and even then there are long queues at each. tables are packed and they overspill to the next restaurant's seats. then it quickly begins to die down and by 4pm it is down to 3 counters with a few guests in line. funny that the kitchen window also has fluctuations... in that small space where the food orders from the kitchen is dished out for the fillers to collect and serve to guests at the counter, it could get totally filled up with trays of food in the busy periods, and even with like 4 fillers frantically serving orders, the food keeps piling. but then at one point, suddenly the window clears and becomes empty... and then another wave of food comes shortly after. i dont understand whats happening, cause the kitchen staff prepare the orders in a regular motion too.

on one incident, a kitchen staff put the tray too far in the window, a little too far to reach. so the chef gave the tray a push; it slid all the way across the greasy metal window surface and came tumbling onto the floor on this side! the worse thing is, it was witnessed by many guests in line. some were shocked, but the counter staff including me were laughing. and of course that chef got a good scolding.

i am starting to get increased work hours a week. more money but more stress. as i stay longer, the number of hours are expected to increase.

bag tear, dragon lockered out

Interesting facts & events

2009-10-07T03:37:00.000+08:00

Unbelievable. I just experienced hibernation. Last night i slept at 1.30am after a day of work. I set the timer to wake me up at 8.30. 7 hours of sleep would be enough to last well through a day. So the timer rang, i woke up, but apparently 7 hours wasnt anywhere enough for my body. i instantly fell back to sleep, just as was for the other incidents of oversleeping. i woke up again and knew i had slept long. so i was expecting it to be about 11am. (since long oversleeping period is about 2 hours). and then i checked my clock and to my horror, it was already 2.10pm! I had slept 12.5 hours!! Now that is my best record in my whole life! and i never expected it to happen here on my program, when time is short. Luckily my work today is at 6pm till late. gonna miss the dragon swing party. such a waste.
So i learn, the body does demand sleep to cover for what is lacked the day before.... cause yesterday i only slept 2 hours.

Talking about oversleeping, it has already caused me 3 latenesses. once for class, twice for work. and i was almost late for my orientation, my first day of work, which would have been disastrous. fortunately and almost miraculously, while i was going to take the long walk out to the main road, a taxi drove past on that secluded road i was at, honked at me and asked me if i needed a taxi! wow, it was like God-given. But it did cost me dearly in money. i saw the taxi fare meter jump by 25 cents every few seconds, it couldnt bear the agony to watch it. The fare came to US$30+! just to get from patterson to magic kingdom... ouch.

I had 3 christian books with me brought along to florida, given by Collin, Lifang and Diana. I have been mostly reading 'Serenity' from Lifang until one day i brought it along for my class, but discovering my class was actually 3 hours later. i decided to visit the magic kingdom but i didnt wanna bring the book along cause i had no bag. So i left it in the middle of some bushes outside Disney university. it was a really nice spot where people normally would not go.. but it seemed really apt to find serenity in the middle of those tall bushes!
I went off to have some fun, came back to retrieve my book, but discovered it was gone! some crazy person actually crept through the tiny path between the bushes, found my book and took it! i suspect its the gardener. he must have been really surprised and intrigued to have found such a book there, nicely placed.
What i hope now is that he didnt throw it away, but took it back to read, hopefully be inspired and transformed. I wouldnt know. But God could be working on it.

I have been taking up the hobby of coin collection here in US. not for the different types of coins, but for the design on different Quarters. apparently it was a very recent thing that the US minted quarters bearing designs for each of the 50 states. they were only produced for about 10 weeks and production has now stopped. So for the past few weeks i have been getting and trading coins and collected all 50 states except just one more very elusive Maine, the northeasternmost state. well, i still have 4 months to get that stupid coin to complete my collection.

i totally shouldnt have gone to work and even miss the dragon swing for it... now i got a bad record in my disney record card just because of a bad mix of factors which mostly i couldnt help... when usually 3 people close a topping bar (its really lots of work), last night they only assigned 2 - me and some girl who has never done topping bar closing before. so i was busy doing my stuff and she went to throw away the leftover food, and then later i discovered she missed out lots more food in the coolers and by then the spoilage sheet was already done, reusable food kept and the food waste taken away.
and i made a bad move unknowingly by alerting the manager for advice instead of the coordinators. so he got to see the situation and got really mad just because i brought the food in late, because my assistant missed it out, because she doesnt know how to close topping bar, and because they only put me with 1 other person. and i have to take all the blame just because i have done closing before, only a few times, and it was aways someone else who did the spoilage. the manager really got mad for nothing without finding out the full story and knowing its actually their fault too. things could have been so much better if i called in and went for the dragon swing instead...

Halloween revisited!

2009-10-01T09:18:00.000+08:00

Last night i went for the halloween party at the magic kingdom again, this time with my whole company of coursemates, and this time everyone was dressed in costumes! My costume was of course... harry potter! we bought our costumes at some costume shop nearby the place where my classes are held. we get 10% cast member discount so its not bad. but still rather expensive. we had all sorts of different costumes... peter pan, clown, cat woman, circus performer, sailor girl, playmate, magcian, ninja, mafia, egyptian pharoah, some i dont even know what they are. but the most outstanding one was surely Yasu's star wars soldier outfit.. all with the full battle suit and helmet! of course they were not made of metal but of rubber and plastic.

it was oh so picturesque, and as we walked along the street and around the place in one big costumed mob of about 20 of us. People along the way stared and marvelled, some of them asked to take pictures with us. at the magic kingdom, other groups of people in costumes came to mix with us and took an even bigger group photo. but they went their own way after that. most of the people at the halloween party was costumed, so we just seemed like normal once we were inside. a really interesting eye opener... halloween is such a big scale thing comapred to in singapore where its hardly existent. we gathered at the cinderella castle to watch the magnificent fireworks like i did the previous time. but this time we managed to find a place much nearer to the castle. it was nicer for us to see that way, but for the camera it looks better when i am a little further away.

this is a family of enthusiasts who we met at the party. indiana jones, maleficent and little luke skywalker. they started talking to us and i managed to take a picture just with them, and talked to them for a while. then today, they actually came to Pecos Bills to look for me! they identified me as 'a guy from singapore who dressed as harry potter last night'. they didnt know my name. Too bad i wasnt working yet when they came, so my colleague told me later. what a waste.

it was hard to do what we wanted when going as a big group. a lot of time spent wasted in waiting for others, taking pictures, being indecisive. moreover we went late. and i dont know why, but they all chose to spend the time taking rides... which could all be done the same any other day in the magic kingdom... it so wasted the stuff that only happens in the halloween party, like the trick a treat stations and the characters that we can queue up to take pictures with. time passed so fast and before i knew it the party time was up. everything closed down at midnight and we had to go back. argh, still so many things we could have done but didnt.

overall, i think it could have been much better. too much time wasted, not much interesting things we did, not as fun as expected based on my previous recce of the party. but it was still fun, a really memorable experience, like once in a lifetime. upcoming is the mickey's very merry christmas party, also in the magic kingdom! i would sure think that would be better... staying hopeful!

Halloween @ disneyworld!

2009-09-24T00:02:00.000+08:00

My flooble chatterbox has been unavailable for more than a week... so much for being temporarily unavailable... and then i realise that the flooble database is being screwed up (too many connections they say) and i see all the other flooble chatterboxes on other blogs arent functional either. So ive decided to change it to another type.

The last 30 secs of halloween fireworks! the bestest part!!

Anyway, i know its still really far from halloween, but these americans are really crazy about it and are already celebrating it in big scale now. especially in disneyworld. yesterday there was mickey's not so scary halloween party going on in the magic kingdom. Night life and halloween at the magic kingdom is a real blast! too bad i went alone. and i also realise, i couldnt have gone with other ppl that easily either.

Since i happen to work in the magic kingdom, after work, i changed out of my costume and sneaked out of the restaurant.
Whew, it was such a liberating experience to get out of the restaurant and the tunnels where we stay within everyday, and into the magic kingdom outside! once outside, in my civilian clothes and without nametag, i am now a guest, and its their turn to serve me.

so then i started going around the trick a treat locations and got a handful of candies at each of them, visiting attractions along the way. theres all sorts of american candies in there, and randomly given. the occasional packets of chocolate are the ones i wanted most.
at the end of the time, i went home with half a bag full of candies, and it filled up a basket left in the apartment for sharing.

and then the highlight of the day is of course the halloween fireworks above the cinderella castle. almost everyday there would be fireworks above the castle. but whats different for the halloween party is that the fireworks are much longer (maybe 20 mins), during which the cinderella castle, the building supposedly a bright fairy taleish wonder, is instead steeped in eerie lighting effects. after the fireworks there is also a performance by life size disney villians at the entrance of the castle.

i noticed that the crowd was well dressed in halloween costumes, and they had disney accesories and goodies that i didnt get, like a goodie bag specially for collecting treats (i used my own bag instead), a book for collecting character's autographs, and seemed to know where to go very well. they must have gotten them at the entrance when coming in. and thats where i didnt go.
later when i came back and told my housemates about it, they were all surprised and said i was lucky and a cheat. because apparently, what i was unaware of, is that specially for this halloween party, even cast members have to pay! for normal guests, they pay even more than the ususal park ticket. and i got in free, because i didnt go in by the main entrance with the guests, but by the cast entrance and through the tunnel to my restaurant, and subsequently sneaking out through the back door into the magic kindom!

i got to attend such a large scale event, which would normally cost me $33, for free! and it was a great time. its such a great feeling to have unknowingly cheated and gained lots from it that others would not. haha. the rest of us intend to go for it on 1 oct, and pay for it. i dont mind going again... and it would feel like i paid once to go for it twice. heh

Earning my ears

2009-09-17T22:58:00.000+08:00

Had my first day of work. and i would say, it seems all good. got to see the restaurant and the surroundings. the restaurant is all wooden and oldern texas style (cause Pecos Bill is a cowboy ). the restaurant is only open from late morning till evening about 7pm, so we practically dont serve dinner, and everything is cleared up by 8. no late nights for me! and mornings are free too, since my shift only starts from noon onwards.

the food is served quite similar to fast food style. the customers make their order, then they go to the counter to collect it, and bring it to their tables themselves. so there actually aint much of the waiter role involved ~ the roles are rather specialised. filler, stock taker, drinks, counter, salad bar, dining room. thats about it. and each of these roles have a rather narrow scope
we arent very busy. and since out tasks are simple, it is quite stress free, though boring.

my trainer is a nice laidback guy, really tall and huge, but not at all intimidating. very patient and friendly, doesnt talk like he is any higher status than me. doesnt pick on me when i make mistakes. too bad he is not my supervisor.

colleagues are alright... most of them didnt take the initiative to welcome me or talk to me, but they all seem friendly, even if they keep to themselves. there are some who do talk to me though, and i am able to make some connection with them even on the first day. look forward to working with these ppl. ive got coworkers from everywhere - different parts of USA, south american countries (so they speak spanish), puerto ricans, australia, indonesian, koreans, chinese. too bad no singaporean. but the chinese ppl get really happy when i speak chinese to them. haha.

i think ill like the culture here while working ~ very open, outspoken, easy to talk to strangers and customers, low emphasis on protocol; so dont need all that respectful culture like it is in chinese and jap restaurants.

there was also a special cast celebration on! a big party for all cast members where we get to eat our fill of bbq food, salad, drinks, even ice cream, and a party going on on stage with some disney characters. apparently im very lucky to start work at such a time, cause the cast celebrations only happens annually! since i was on training, i was able to take a longer break to attend the cast celebration. yay.

fireworks light the sky every other night above the cinderella castle. too bad im still working at the time it shows. but i can still go to the backyard to catch a glimpse of it.

ok, my 2nd day of work is starting soon. shall see how much my impressions would change after a while.

A week's progress

2009-09-16T08:29:00.000+08:00

Exactly one week ago, i was on the plane on my way here.

It seems like so long ago that i been here. By now i am starting to get used to this apartment, the environment, weather, and the people. It seems like so long ago since ive last been at home, in Singapore. but the feeling is not of homesickness, but of nostalgia. i dont experience such a separation with my old world back in Sg as i feared or imagined. but then again, it may be too early to say. after all, its only been one week.

Within the week that has passed, i travelled here, moved into the apartment, bought all our stuff to furnish up the place and make it homely, got familiar with the surrouning area, adapted to the new life, and adapted to my housemates. got used to the american lifestyle and products.

in respect to the internship program, ive done all my admin stuff (they were really a chore), completed my training, and today i had my job orientation! Finally i receive my work schedule, get to see my workplace, received my uniform (or costume it is called) and also get to tour around the magic kingdom! too bad i didnt bring my camera and didnt have chances to take photos anyway. tomorrow is the start of my work proper at the Pecos Bills cafe. and next week will be the start of my UNCG modules.

Soon it will be just monotony of work and lessons. though each day should be different since we are dealing with diferent customers (or guests they call them) but after a while it gets quite routine i guess. i know that the best way to make every working day new and unique is to relate to each guest as unique individuals and not just another customer. ill try.

People say that at first we would come here and miss home and wanna go back badly, then after a while we start to like it, and at the end we dont wanna go back. but as far as i can see, i may enjoy my time in Disneyworld and working there. i may come to enjoy the company of my peers while im here. but even so, one things for sure - the environment is so much better in Singapore, and there is no place like home.

A new life

2009-09-11T12:02:00.000+08:00

It is now the 4th day into the start of my new life - the life away from home and into the Disneyworld experience.

Prior to leaving, i thought i was ready. i did almost all i could, and there was nothing that i really wanted to do but didnt. definitely, i had underestimated the preparations needed. Reality had not dawned on me yet. It was only when at that historical moment that i entered the checkin area on my own and waved goodbye to my family, did the realisation come and the truth suddenly sank in so deep and awoke me from my delusion.

A new life has just begun. A whole new different life for the next 5 months.
Only then did i realise how mentanlly unprepared i was.
I'm on my own now.
I realise how dependant i was on my family and my friends back here.
the new life would be one of independence - meaning both freedom and vulnerability.
A life full of challenges and pitfalls.
Terrible nervousness set in, like never felt before.

I had been so busy focusing on savouring the old life as much as i could before leaving. Yes i prepared myself for leaving the old life. But i missed out the even bigger part of preparing myself for the new life.
perhaps things could have been better if there was proper amount of orientation programs or briefings back in SG before going. nor did we meet earlier on that day.
its like one moment im busy packing at home and all focused there, and then the next i find myself on the plane, into the new life, and no return till the end.
it was such a sudden transition. happened all so fast. its like i was suddenly pushed out into the open

I must say though that the torturously long flight time to get there served as a good time to think and do the mental preparations i lacked. It was like a good 29 hours of purgatory, neither in the old nor new life. at the end of it, i still didnt get into the spirit of the new life (until now i still havent) but i had gotten over the anxieties.
the song Daniel came to mind, and it brought back memories from the time when i first got confirmed into this program. the excitment, anticipation and fantasies i had of it, which has faded off by now.

Theres so much to say, but not the opportnities and the discpline as of now. Generally im fine. Not missing home too much, not suffering too much, not disliking anything too much. I have still yet to settle into this new life and place. Yes things go wrong, things may not be so pleasant, and i have already faced some problems and disappointments, but they do not have the lingering effect which is what would make my time a torture. I learn to take it in stride.
I can safely say that it would be an enriching, valuable once-in-a-lifetime experiential opportunity. but other than that, many things are still left in the dark, many uncertainties remain about what would be coming up next. From what has been revealed, they have been mostly very different from what i expected.

All the more, it leaves room open for God's guidance to go ahead of me, and His glory to be revealed.

Final Words

2009-09-07T22:45:00.000+08:00

The time now is 1am, Tuesday 8 september. Im into my 6th last hour in Singapore for this whole year and part of next. The time has come. the time for me to leave this place, and into
A WHOLE NEW WORLD!

oh fine. its just disney world. haha.

So i shall take this bit of time left to blog. cause its a moment to remember. and i wont know when ill be able to blog again. maybe my next post would be about my whole week of orientation already.

Right now my feelings are not of excitement, but of reminiscence, quite emotional about leaving this place behind and being separated from this part of the world for the whole 5 months till its over. i cant even make a slight fix to my room after this, or grab a piece of paper i forgot to bring. I feel strange. But it doesnt seem to feel like im gonna enter a transition real soon. maybe it will at the airport. And of course, tiredness.

Its been a whole day of packing. Gosh, i truly underestimated the task and process of packing. yes i had all the things to pack in mind, and it may seem simple putting them into the bags. but when i get into action then do i realise how complicated it is. As for now i have finally packed finish and tidied up my room. But it took me at least 7 hours in total just to pack. and maybe another hour to tidy up my room. and then a bit of business to do using my comp before i go, such as this, blogging.

Looking back, i think my last few days here has been spent quite well. i am satisfied with it, and it will certainly be memorable. i got to meet many friends and go for many events; from sec school to poly to church friends, over several different occasions. Hq and andrew's farewell, dinner at Din Tai Fung twice, gabriel's house twice. some casual outings. and of course, the surprise farewell party for me.

The farewell party was great. though the surprise didnt work except to get me all confused on Friday when i was told to announce it in Jym. i think it was a little too short. timings werent really favourable. the jymers took long to come over from church, and many had to leave early, for whatever reasons including the wake. bad clash of timings. organisation could have been better. activities could have been better too. it almost became just like a free and easy gathering where ppl come to eat and play on their own. but last minute some activity got into place and saved the day. didnt save me from being deceived and forcefully dunked in the pool while wearing a pants i needed for USA. but it was fun while it lasted, yeah.

And then today (im speaking of monday cause it still seems like today) the last day, did feel special compared to the previous days. its the feeling of savouring every moment and experience of Singapore remaining that i could. I spent the afternoon in West Mall with my mom and Joel, doing last minute shopping (never shopped for US any time before). God granted me success and we were able to find the stuff i wanted very easily, and got them all at good deals. I got to enjoy soya milk probably the last time in a long time cause i doubt they have it in USA.
2 people met me to pass me stuff last minute. interestingly, both were passing to me on the behalf of someone else, and both had the opportunity to pass it to me earlier but forgot. haha.

For my last dinner here, i had special home cooked dishes upon request. Curry chicken, sambal kang kong, promfrets and herbal soup... gonna miss all these food! and of course, the durians i had for dessert. no way im gonna find it there. it would drive all the ang mohs away.

Ok im now left with like 1h 45mins left to sleep. its ok, ill replenish it on the plane. But now while i can, i shall take my last sleep/ nap on my bed, in my room. Goodbye in advance, to my home, the Singapore environment, my friends and society. Whats more to say, ive said it before.

Preparations and closures

2009-09-01T23:44:00.000+08:00

Only 5 more days remain for me back here in Singapore. Exams are out of the way (or so i consider), and in these last few days im rushing and planning it all to make the time worth while. now that i realise it, time flies so frighteningly fast, each days left is precious and theres no time to waste. I want to make the final days special. I must do all i can back here, while i can, before i go off. thats what i feel.
And I dont wanna miss a thing...

Reality is dawning on me that my time left in SG is almost over, and the next time i'll be back here is 5 months later. Im still looking forward to my time in Disneyworld of course. i still think it would be great and worth the while. But one thing that has changed since the past few weeks or months - i no longer feel the anxiety, nervousness or worry about being away for 5 months. I no longer worry over what ill miss out here and what would happen if i forgot to do something here or bring sth along. I stll think its a long time to be away, but my view of this long time has become not as long as before. Ironic huh, since it should be the other way when the time is coming near.

Part of this could be because i have been talking to others who have been overseas for long periods too. of course they are all going overseas to study and none are actually going for internship like i am, so its different, but the similarities are sufficient. i gained valuable insights on life in a foreign country and settling in there. how to pack, what to bring. Which is why i have also decided to travel light.
I do not intend to bring a lot of things. ill just bring along all those things which i know i would use most and surely use. for all those not so important things which i dont know if i may use or not, ill not be so kiasu. also for the benefit of me carrying the luggage, and the space it may take up in my new apartment.
After all, most of the things i need, i would be able to buy there. yeah it may burn a bit of hole in my shallow pockets while im there, but hey its worth all the fuss and packing and cluttering if otherwise.

yes this 5 months could be a time of separation. where i would miss out on contact with many people here. even those who do contact me, would not be as effective as if im here. I do foresee relations growing dry, communications fading off, and some would forget me altogether. I dont want that to happen as far as possible, but thats a natural thing when such separation is in place.

I pray ill spend this time wisely, and that the opportunities would be favourable to me.

Out of sight, out of mind

2009-08-24T12:33:00.000+08:00

Shagged, exhausted, I come before the Lord

Had been a long day, you could tell.

Drained of energy to read the word,

But a simple prayer to guilt dispel.

Exam time come, calls for mugging all day

Projects due soon, rushing on the report.

Free time at last, but i use it to play.

Just where, oh where is the time for God?

Lord, help me do my best in all I do

And may all i do bring glory to you.

Yet in course of life, striving for success,

May I not remember you any less.

Woeful Tradition

2009-08-20T22:51:00.000+08:00

So its the start of the lunar seventh month again, and lots of people everywhere around singapore are still into their practices of hungry ghost festival.

I dont understand their motivation behind all this, and why they want to believe in such things. To people like me and some others, it is an unwelcome tradition which i find rather useless. nothing good about it, and lots of bad.

Burning stacks of hell notes, making food offerings, ligthing red candles, shadow puppet shows and halls set up for the purpose of this festival. whats the point behind all this?

Everywhere along the roads and paths, people are burning stacks of hell notes. sometimes in huge burners which is slightly more considerate, but others burn it on the pavement, or even on the grass. I chanced upon just now a gigantic pile of burnt ashes almost a metre tall (imagine the amount of paper that went into it!) which no longer burned but was still smoking, upon a grassy area beside a food centre. Whos gonna clear up all these ashes... they leave burn marks on the pavements and especially the grass which could stay until the next year when they do it again. The government should label this as vandalism. And so is the burning of their red candles which leave trails of red wax everywhere...
The worst part of it is the massive air pollution that results. smoke fills the air and a few hunded metres away i can smell the horrid burning incense and hell notes (which have a different smell from usual paper...) as if there wasnt enough global warming, or haze from indonesia.

Whats the point of burning so much hell notes? they are merely pieces of paper with pictures and words on them, hoping that they would somehow go into the nether world they believe in and become what it depicts there... as 'real' stuff. i may not know the tradition well or if theres really anything more to it, but im thinking, why does someone who is dead need so many houses, cars, handphones, money etc? they could just burn one per person and thats enough. hell is meant to be a place of suffering. and secondly, how would they determine who those notes go to? it just burns and goes to the underworld, for anyone to take? i would like to know their story.

I have also seen many food offerings. I have commonly seen small plates with joss sticks along the path side; i almost kicked over a plate of oranges and cakes beside the road while not looking. And there are bigger scale displays - at my school's fast food area today, i saw a KFC auntie laying out a whole tray of KFC food (burger, 2 packets of fries, 2 pc chicken, drinks, mash potato) and stuck joss sticks around them! And even bigger so, yesterday along the road in some open space, i chanced upon a long table with at least 10 seaters, all laid out with plates with food in it, like a big feast in a banquet! each seater had a packet drink with straw poked in for them... at the end of the table was an altar.
Isnt it exceedingly extravagant, or at least wasteful... Do they really think the ghosts that have no physical bodies would be hungry and can actually eat in the first place? They just leave all the good food (which could have well fed many people instead) out there to rot, and when the ants, rats and cockraoches have eaten them up, they feel satisfied that the 'ghosts' have had their meal... It is an eyesore, a sickening waste of food, turns into a rotting mess and which only invites pests.

So, at the whole point of it is that they feel the spirits are out in the open now to cause trouble for people. but i would say in actual fact, the spirits are out only because the people invited them. that is the case for most cases of spiritual activity... so they brought the trouble upon themselves, and they try to solve it as such. Does supernatural activity really increase during this period? i dont think so, its all in the mind, and all up to people's receptiveness to them.
Therfore set your mind on things above, not things from below.
there is no benefit entertaining even the thoughts about these unwanted entities, whatever there might be.

I am thankful that i dont need to be guilty of air pollution, wasting food, cowering in fear for a month, and missing out on all kinds of celebrations during the period. I remember 2 years ago, my birthday fell on the first day of the 7th month thing. i pity all those born in late august and participate in HGF.
Most of all, I am thankful that i know the God omnipotent who is master over all and in whom i can blot out all superstition and fear.

August times

2009-08-18T02:14:00.000+08:00

I dont know whats wrong with blogger. The page always fail to load on my laptop, and occasionally fails on the desktop too. but when i ask others, they say its fine. must be the internet here.

So i didnt have the chance to blog in several days, not that much happened.
A hallmark event was on last friday though - it was the very last lesson for my entire course! everyone wasnt veery bothered about it and getting emo and stuff. they just treated it as a normal lesson, cant wait to go off for the friday evening as usual. well now its just a week more till the exams, and 3 weeks more till its disney time! To be exact, its 21 days.
as of now, i still feel really unperpared.

Last week i also celebrated my birthday. my birthdays have always been really quiet. no parties, no big gatherings or special activities to celebrate. But still, this year's could arguably be my 'best' birthday so far.
What makes a good birthday?
For most ppl, birthday is a time for others to remember and appreciate you, appreciating your birth in that sense. but what really makes a birthday good and memorable really depends on personal preferences and one big C word -contentment.
how ironic, i say my bd isnt so good cause its so quiet, with not many ppl to celebrate for me. ut yet if ppl ask me, i would say i dont want parties or alot of pomp and ceremony. haha
so i would say, its the thought that counts.
how is this thought assessed then?
if its based on results in terms of the extent of the celebrations, presents received, wishes, cards, treats etc, it could be inaccurate measure.
I happen to be born at a very bad time, when everyone is having tests and exams coming up. so many ppl dont have the time to celebrate for me, or think about what to get for me. i suppose some are also too caught up thinking about their work to remember my bd.
Though i received NO presents this year (maybe they are still coming, i dunno.)
I cant really describe why, but I can feel the warmth of my friends, the societies im in, much more than it was last year. And thus i believe, they really do appreciate me internally, more than they may show through material means. And that is what matters more.

Its just one week more till the exams. the final exams for my course. (its not very decisive like O levels though) adn the exam fervor has not gotten to me at all yet. im still slacking at a time like this, feeling really unproductive.
So many things to do, so little time. yet i do things that are less important first...
Its like as if, im just looking ahead at disney, and everything else on the way becomes blur and i dont care so much about them... i really hate this arrangement that i have to leave so soon after the end of the semester. big time spoiler, man.

On a lighter note, im glad im able to know of someone who is already there in Disneyworld now, doing the same internship program, even the same role (quick svc F&B). She was able to provide me a whole good deal of information about what its like over there, and it really helps me get prepared, physically and mentally. Thanks be to God.

Disney: the near future

2009-08-07T23:11:00.000+08:00

the countdown stands at 32 days remaining before its time for me to leave.

thats about one whole month. my last presentation is finished! which also means the last of projects is done. i can really feel the slackness of this sem compared to the previous sem, which was a mad rush all the way from half of first term to the last week of school. now all is done and theres still a week of school left (in which theres not much to do), followed by the study week, and then the 2 exam weeks.

so whats left now is just studies for the final exams. as in really final. though not all decisive like O levels was. 19 days till my first paper, and 28 till the last. if i really spend all those time into studying, that would be more than enough. but i gotta get to work already, so as to make up for the time later, and hopefully i would still have some spare time before the exam ends,
because after my last paper, i only have 4 pathetic days left to enjoy myself before i fly off!

that really sucks. thats hardly any time to cool down and savour the life of Singapore while i still could, and spend time with my friends before i bid them farewell. surely, some of it has to spill into the exams period. and i gotta make up for that.

well at least i will be celebrating my birthday before i go off. only for this year i would say it comes at a good time, when all the busy-ness has gone down and hopefully could have something to celebrate. and then what lies ahead...

..............................

Anyways, yesterday was the second call for timeout home edition! it turns out, not much of a home edition for me. but it turns out it was even better than being at home, cause i did my time out in a 5-star hotel! cool huh.
cause at 9pm yesterday, i was all out at clarke quay for a family dinner. so the time came, and i left the table and all my relatives there (just finished eating) and slipped alone into the Merchant court hotel, intending to do it in the toilet. but i couldnt find the toilet, and instead i came to the lobby area where there was a lounge with sofa, dimly lit with candlelights and nobody else around - a perfect place to do the timeout!

so i sat on the sofa and crouched over in prayer. hotel guests were walking by a few metres away but i didnt bother. and then while i was praying, suddenly i heard a female voice saying "excuse me...", i looked up and saw a hotel staff. i thought, oh no,i think im not supposed to be here... and then she asked, "would you like a drink..?"
haha, she probably thought i was some lonely depressed guy going there to emo in the dark, and need a drink to go with it.

i didnt stay for the whole timeout. after about 15 mins, i heard that its time to go. so i went out back to the restaurant, and just as i reached there, everybody stood up to leave. wow, perfect timing! so that was my timeout experience. a great one, once again.

Poisson Poison?

2009-08-01T23:46:00.000+08:00

Not long ago i witnessed the pond downstairs of my condo having its water changed. its water was all dirty and full of fish shit and greenish, so i thought its just a maintenance stunt. of course all of the koi fish in it had to be taken out. the pond was drained, filled with new clear water, and had a few baby fish in it.

but this went on for a few weeks, having just those few baby fish in it.

why is it taking so long for them to bring back those big koi fish?

a few days ago there appeared some new medium sized fish, but that was nothing compared to the usual amount and sizes of the fish.

then the truth was revealed unto me today, after the estate AGM.

All the hundred over koi fishes DIED!!

A shocking discovery i never knew. and i am really grieved at the massive loss of those fish.

i really liked them alot. they were like my pets to me. but unlike usual pet fish, they are not boring creatures that do not respond except to swim away when you go near. these large koi fish would even eat bread out of my hand, and i dont need to fear them biting me cause they have no teeth. they just suck at the food, and its quite ticklish.

they were also fun to play with. especially when hungry, they would swarm towards me, opening their mouths so beg for food. and when a piece of bread was thrown in the middle of the crowd of fish, a frenzy occurs as they all rush to get the morsel. continuously throw pieces into the same area and youll see all the fish saturated in one area, splashing around and jumping on top of each other. what a sight. the most fun part though, is putting pieces of food on the shallow rock, and watch the greedy kois climb onto the rock, even out of water, to attempt at getting the food.

The cause for the fishs' deaths have not been determined. it is noted that a new batch of fish were added into the pond with all the koi fish. shortly after, all the fish, old and new, died.

what could have been so serious that it causes all the fish to suddenly die? the most plausible theory is a potent disease carried by the new fish. but even so, why didnt those fish die before getting into the pond then, and why all at the same time?

anyways, i think it was kinda stupid to put those new fish in. the pond is already so crowded and had more than enough fish. put more for what. now see what happens, all gone.

hopefully the new young kois would grow up well and multiply and populate the pond once again. until then, i'll miss all my beloved koi fish.

Timed out

2009-07-31T00:41:00.000+08:00

I participated in the call for timeout today, and it was a great experience. i actually just finished my dinner, hanging around awhile and watching heroes. and luckily i set my reminder, cause i actually forgot. so just after heroes ended, it was time. i had not really prepared for it, so i just decided to go into my room, close the door and pray in the dark.

not knowing how to start, i just stared out of my window. And guess what brought me the first inspiration - Mars!
Yes it was very visible today, in view from my little window. and no, i didnt go marvelling at the wonder of God's creation, but instead on the dream i had about going to mars.

From there on it just went on and on, actually having me just repeating a lot of things and all the main things that i had prayed for all the previous nights. it was a time of solitude, away from all distractions, focusing all on God, and just pouring out my heart to Him. I lasted through the entire half hour doing nothing but sitting there and talking.

but what was really different about it from all the time i spend before i go to bed, is that i did not do it at the very last part of the day, when im all tired out, and do a quick one. the timeout session brought me a sense of peace, comfort, and relaxation. i felt less tired after it. its like some spa treatment without any materials required!

i rarely get the time and discipline to do such things when there is still other stuff to do. i think making these official time out periods are a good idea. also for the benefit of all those who forgot about it and missed the opportunity, we should have more of these next time.

Update 26/7

2009-07-27T01:19:00.000+08:00

The countdown stands at only 43 days left before i leave for USA. time is really flying fast.

i know i been having a writers block for about 2 weeks already. partly was cause i was busy, but even if i had time, i had nothing to post about either.

whats been up for me the past week, rushing on projects that we started doing the week before but half slacking too. only when the deadline is dangerously near then do we start to chiong. thats the way we work, and thats how we have been in this group or the previous. Class culture, yeah.

so this week has 3 projects due, and one more just tmr. mad rush the whole week. what really annoyed me though was having to redo or make significant editions to my project portion 3 times., and twice for the portfolio. could have been much better. i was sleepy throughout the day, everyday.

well but now, all of them are done! The end of the last project for my whole poly course! (excluding maybe some that Disney might make me do)
right after the rush, it was time to party! well i did to a certain extent on fri, but was spoilt by a last minute project meeting again. oh wells.

what lies ahead now is only 3 presentations (not a big deal) and 5 exams. (this is the big deal.) but i have about a month from now to study. i really must make good use of it and not waste too much time playing to recover the week's stress. gotta keep going.
NAPFA test is on on this coming friday too... ahh. aint gonna do very well but ill just give my best shot.

Update 16/7

2009-07-16T12:48:00.000+08:00

It seems i have no certain topic that i could centre the post on. ah, writers block. for quite some time already. so ill just try to write with no restrictions.

it seems that either hardly anyone saw or bothered to respond to my previous post. its sad. looks like a direct approach is necessary for all.

This has been a really dull semester in school. exams and projects have been mediocre, no extraordinary experiences, no spectacular events, nothing i can really look forward to. both my ccas have been really inactive. im now only looking forward to the disney internship in less than 2 months time, but even that is shaken. there is a slight chance that ill be stopped from going. but i feel strongly that things will be alright.

The recession has come again. not of the economy, but of my life. these are the times where i feel all low and empty and drained of self esteem or hope. of course it is not as bad as the unforgettable trench period i had between may and sept last year. (cant really rmb the time) once again my past has come back to haunt me. and i realised, the life boost that i had after the trench experience has faded - i have lost that drive, hunger and motivation. in a way, situations have not been so good for me. but on my part, i have also been lax.

Perhaps its brought by the inadequacy i feel when doing my projects. and the personal portfolio assignment also played a big part. cause we are all required to gather all the acheivements we have obtained in our life, and put them all together into a portfolio, as our project. seeing from the 'examplary works' done by previous students that the tutor showed us, mine would pale in comparison. even more than pale actually. why, my life has been severely deprived and void of achievements. Looking at myself, there are so many things that others can do that i cant, and there is nothing that im really good at. this assignment is really cruel. it is an ego booster for those high-achieving students, but a depression stimulator for those who are not.

The hope i have in God is what keeps me going and my source for staying positive. And the best defence against this that i have to remind myself - that i should not be finding my pride and identity in the things of this world and the worldly acheivements i have. im not saying that i have much spiritual achievements either, but i take hope that there are much more to come.

Though this semester is theoretically much slacker than the previous, it seems i have also become slack too so that i still do not give more as i could. there are 3 projects due soon plus the portfolio, and i already feel like im gonna die. ahh, my discipline and hardworkingness has died off over the long holidays and even at a time like this, i have not got it back! all my time wastes away into unfruitfulness, and now im left to struggle through my projects once again.

im addicted to facebook. thats what. i could spend the whole day on facebook. looking at profiles, pictures, notes, and especially the games. oh why do they have to be so entertaining.... ppl some more asked me to play restaurant city, geo challenge and pet society, but im already so distracted, if i start playing them too, ill die lor.

Yesterday for dinner, i went to eat at some lower end jap restaurant. for ramen, they let us choose how spicy we want it, from a scale of 1 chilli to 8 chillis. now from experience, even the most spicy choice is not that spicy till its unbearable, or nobody would order that. so i thought perhaps 8 chillis is for the real spicy lovers. so ill just go for 6 chillis, should be just nice for me. and it turned out, even 6 chillis is already crazily spicy! its really like chilli soup... i wonder how anyone can take 8 chillis and survive! yeah, it was quite a suffering for me, but i still finished it anyway. slowly bit by bit, drinking lots of water. and now im suffering the side effects of spice overload. which takes effect on my stomach and intestines. you get the picture.

oh well.. i should really get into doing my projects and studying... time is really short and i have to feel the heat by now. Discipline....

Add me!

2009-07-11T16:38:00.000+08:00

Attention, all readers, I will be changing my email address to
John_one23@hotmail.com
please add me on MSN to make things easier for me. thanks!

I am sick and tired of emails being sent to wrong addresses because people misspelt mine. either the L becomes I, or the 0 becomes O or even Q... so annoying.
i know it might get abit complicated, but i figured i better change before i use this old add for even more things and it snowballs.

why i choose such an add? cause its simple, easy to rmb. for those who dont know the underlying significance, it looks fine. but for those who do, i think its really meaningful. so, there it is.

Forced discipline part 2

2009-07-06T20:45:00.000+08:00

My internet had been restored!!!

suddenly, unexpectedly, mysteriously restored. just yesterday i tried, the internet was still down. previously we tried so hard to fix it, to no avail. but now, we didnt have to do anything! just turned on the laptop, and it was working again!

this is the convo i had with Joel just before the internet came on. i was using the desktop.
Jo: go upload your facebook photos on your own comp la!
Me: the internet not working what...
Jo: then go do something about it! youre not doing anything and expect it to get fixed?
Me: tomorrow ill bring it to my schools laptop service centre, see if they can do anything. if not, ill call up HP for warranty. if not, then just wait lor.
Jo: wait for what??!
Me: wait for the internet to suddenly work again.
Jo: Siao.

After talking for a while more, Joel went to try fixing my laptop again, only to find it working again! To God be the glory.

Thus fulfils the prediction i had (stated in the other post) that the internet would come on again after i finished my exams. i also mentioned after my immediate assignments, which is actually not done yet, but which i need the internet in order to do! Really God has been watching over me in this.
In fact, it is because i believed that God was behind this whole thing that i said 'wait for the internet to work again'. that step of faith did reap rewards, and God has proven faithful once again.

Something wondrous took place, indeed.

The Unluckiest Day

2009-07-02T19:24:00.000+08:00

It wasnt bad enough that my test today was screwed up. what happened after that was a series of unfortunate events.

One simple mistake, but happening in all the wrong kinds of situations.
After my test, i took a bus and decided to stop at KAP to buy lunch (bumped into Denise, who disappeared from church for ages), then take a transfer bus from another bus stop. and the bus happened to be - 170.

So i was being distracted with my phone while the bus was reaching my stop, then i just grabbed my burger and dropped off. Only after the bus had gone out of sight did i realise, i left my file on the bus! in it contained one of my favourite pens, thermometer, house keys, and all the notes for tmr's exam! i couldnt go home anyway, and i needed to study. so i quickly boarded the next 170 and follow all the way to the terminal. (which was how i got my hp back last time).

little did i know that 170 happens to go all the way to Malaysia! (of all buses, man...) so i was dropped off at the woodlands checkpoint, told the bus captian about my problem. he was all bochup about it. i asked the police there to help, they said they would help me check, but i doubt it. my file probably went to some terminal in remote malaysia and is kept there... i just left my contact with the police and hope they will somehow find it.

And then, my phone died! i have been really annoyed with this stupid LG phone many times already. its battery capacity cant last 2 days of normal usage, and the worst part is, the battery meter always stays full until theres like 20% left, then drops drastically. before i get to react, its all outta bat.

so im stuck outside home without keys until my parents comes back at 7. my notes are all the way in malaysia when im supposed to be studying for the test just tomorrow. im caught up at one end of the island. And... i am cut off from all means of communication and entertainment! the only thing i had left was my wallet. that was a totally lost feeling.

once i was at the terminal, i was not supposed to go back. everyone who takes the bus there is expected to go to malaysia. it was a 'restricted area'. so i was held back and given some interrogation when i went to the office and told them i wanna go back. i think that old man just didnt understand english when i told him i came to look for my stuff, and he just kept saying i took the wrong bus =,='

It was such a terrible day. But one thing i took back from this is learning to keep calm. i think God told me to just enjoy the moment for what it is. so i did. Without distractions of the hp, and just putting every worry out of my mind: of the lost items, being locked out of the house, and tmr's exams, i just looked out of the window and enjoy the scenery as i passed by during the ride, appreciating God's creation. that was really relaxing. the scenery from woodlands to bukit timah is really different from the usual singapore. lots of undeveloped land, mostly lowrise developments. yet doesnt seem too desolate.

reaching back at my condo, i realised nobody was at home, and not gonna be until 7, when my parents return. i had almost 2 hours to burn, and really nothing to do. then i just had this feeling i should pay a visit to my neighbour. well not really neighbour but still. this was proabaly the stroke of luck in an unucky day. i ended up at Stacey's house, and i was approaching from a distance, she was sitting there, and spotted me! rescue has come. and just in time, before she was to go out. spent the next hour or so watching her play tennis with her friends.

now im still left with study to do. i realised i could access all those notes i lost on the internet. relief. but most probably i would just use the thick old textbook. hope it still goes well with this little bit of study ill do....

Forced Discipline

2009-06-30T14:03:00.000+08:00

Ahhh!! my internet is down!! who can live without internet nowadays..?

So its the week of my exams. and i guess im supposed to be studying the whole day. but sometimes i just get the urge to take a break, get on the comp for an hour or so. And then voila, suddenly for no reason, my wireless connection on my laptop just stopped working! its been like this since yesterday, and nothing i can do could fix it. connection on the desktop is perfectly fine, using the same router.

i guess this is God's way of forcing discipline on me. yeah i think im out of control these few months. So if after my exams, and after i done all my immediate assignments, the internet mysteriously restores itself again, we will all know something wondrous has took place. :)

Back from harvest fields

2009-06-22T01:00:00.000+08:00

So the missions in all 6 locations have ended and everyone has returned home safely. the missions to Siem Reap was really fun, and we really got to bond a lot as one whole team. nobody is left out. but just seeing that we had so much fun, could mean either that something is right, or wrong.

what i think is that Mission Siem Reap was too slack. such that though we can have much fun, in the end it seems quite dull. Looking back at it, we have not accomplished or experienced that much as expected of a week of intensive missions work.
there has not been any out-of-the-world experiences or extreme eye-openers for me. (though a half of the group might have, after going to the slums) no obstacles, struggles or situations that really gives us a boost of faith. there has been no casualties throughout the trip, nobody so sick or badly injured that they could not participate in the activities. its just been a time of fun, still not much out of our comfort zone. And thats not what missions are meant to be. hearing the stories of the other mission teams, i feel our team has really been deprived.

But i must say that this trip was not unfruitful. we did get to learn alot of new things and gained general experience, obtained from the little things we do and encounter. Even just bonding as a team, is already an achievement. Being the scribe of the Acacian team, (Sarah wong was also a scribe, but slacked on her job) i have the details of the trip activities recorded, and will post it up on my recollections blog.
Gosh, i still have to submit a report on it. but its ok, i kinda like it.

Into the fields of harvest

2009-06-15T03:12:00.000+08:00

Just a quick post just before i fly off to Siem Reap, Cambodia in half a days time. i guess i havent blogged much about this, if any.

The time has come! the event the jym and maybe the whole church too has been planning, praying and preparing for. finally it has come to pass, and finally the time has come for us to set off into our respective harvest fields, or rather, mission locations.
well, managed to clear my projects for now (though i know it will surely come back to haunt me) bags packed and set to go (took me less than an hour to pack. some girls were taking ages and getting all stressed.) Thank God that though this whole week past has been full of mission meetings and preparations, i still managed to tide it through with my other commitments. yes now that the actual moment has arrived, im (finally) beginning to feel the sense of excitement and expectation.

indeed, i have great confidence in this missions. not just mine but also those in the 5 other mission fields. we are like the pioneers of JYM mass missions. im sure it will be a wonderful experience where God's glory can be displayed, and we would get to learn so many things, gain so much experience. i am confident that it will be a great eye-opener, but we'll all be fine.

basically what i look forward to most is the experience. getting to learn more about:
1. God (His character and might)
2. Myself (my character in face of missions, my abilities)
3. The people of Siem Reap (experience their living conditions and culture, see their needs.)
4. my fellow missionaries. (ppl get to understand each other best by working together)

more than half of Jym would be gone overseas tmr. but that leaves the remaining here not excluded. i guess prayer warriors are very important too, supporting us from home base. Pray for God's had to really be upon us, both is guiding and protecting us.
and away we go...! be back in 6 days.

How well do you know me?

2009-06-08T22:51:00.000+08:00

So far, 13 people have taken the 'how well do you know me' quiz on facebook since i published it about 5 days ago. and failed. most did on the first day, then a few more after, but today was kinda the 'closing date' so i quickly tried to get whoever i is left to do the quiz before i talk about the answers.

And im glad i did, cause only today did i finally get someone who passed! Who that person is, can be easily seen. Yeah he was lucky, to guess correct some of the qns he had no clue to, but the rest was atributed to taking time to thinking through before answering. and that was partly the purpose meant for the quiz: to set ppl thinking.
Im not saying that the rest who failed didnt think before answering! maybe not enough luck :P

So anyways, i guess its time to address some of the answers.

ill skip to no. 15 first since its more important. Where is my poly internship held?
I guess many still do not know about my internship, and yeah i didnt really announce either, though briefly mentioned much earlier.
So hear ye! im flying off to Florida, USA on 8 september - just 3 months time! Ill be having my internship/attachment there with Disneyworld resorts as part of my poly course, lasting for 5 months. hope this message gets across to many.

1) What date is my birthday?
my birthday is on 13 august. time for those who dont know to know!

3) What is the title of the 101th post on my blog?
i dont think anyone actually bothered to check. but the answer could be found by finding the 100th post which i mentioned in that post.

4) What was my primary school CCA?
killer question! all those who knew i was in scouts in sec school put cub scouts. but no...

5) What special treatment did i NOT have during pri 6?
everyone thought i didnt have counselling. well, i gues thats good!

6) What is my worst subject for O levels?
another killer qn. partly trick question too. yes my chinese is bad, but i didnt even take it for O levels =P

8) Which is my true zodiac sign, according to the trait descriptions?
After reading through the descriptions of people's character for each zodiac, according to online articles, i find that Virgo describes me best. going by birth date, im a Leo.

9) Which animals best represent qualities i want to have?
i briefly mentioned in an earlier blog post. peace and faithfulness is what i desire to have.

12) What kind of characters peeves me the most?
many ppl put the answer as those who talk behind my back. thats a common peeve i guess? of course i dont like that too. but attitude problem is more all-encompassing, and attitude is what matters to me.

13) What are my most detested creatures?
i have lots to say about snails and my feud with them.

14) Which ASEAN country have i not been to?
a slight trick or give away. China is not in Asean! 4 options left...

17) Which one is not one of my F&B creations?
yet another killer qn. oh why does nobody believe in my tea leaf rice! its really was something... not something very nice though. haha

19) What have i NOT dreamt i was?
i guess nobody can know my dreams. i did dream i was spirit-like, but not visiting ppl. levitating was fun! and being a father was rather anxious feeling.

20) In my Dota randoming streak, which hero have i not randomed yet?
thought my dota peeps would know better. turns out, not really. i have not used Sand king for a real long time.

23) If God made me like the grass that is green, i would...
this qn is really random but just for fun! its actually from a not so well known song...

24) Why is 24 a nice number?
to me, 12 seems like the 'complete number', and 13 is the extra one out.

so there, thats a review of my quiz. if anyone reads this post and then does the quiz, i would know why the scores are getting higher.

Bon Troisieme Anniversaire!

2009-05-28T22:07:00.001+08:00

the time has come again. yet another year has passed, with this blog faithfully serving me and preserving accounts my journey in life, my thoughts and the events happening along the way. So i would like to take this time to say,

HAPPY 3RD BIRTHDAY, MY DEAR BLOG!!

Post count: 156. Not so nice number. im 6 posts overshot from the ususal 50 per year.
Ive touched up the templates a little, though still no new skin. i dun want any unfamiliarity and loss of features. i think this skin is fine.
last year i did not do any flashbacks, so this year i would like to backtrack 2 years in time, reading up on all the posts over again until current day. indeed it is a refreshing experience to dig up all these vividly documented past memories, even if its only 2 years. One day when im old and grey, these old posts would be priceless. to me at least. Hopefully blogger will still be functional by then.

These are some of the more interesting, meaningful or informative posts i have identified from these past 2 years:

For fun & information

18/8/07 The last bean (3 parts)
26/9/07 Stability wins
24/11/07 The infectious bone
28/3/08 –random
4/4/08 Dota custom heroes!
27/7/08 Rocket man
13/8/08 Memoirs of a cell
26/1/09 Mission Melaka gallery
20/4/09 Creatures of the wild

Spiritual / debate

12/10/07 Undercover
21/4/08 World of suffering
19/5/08 Grey issues
2/6/08 Checkpoint: death
3/8/08 Born again?
23/10/08 Challenge of faith
24/11/08 Joy in sufferings
25/2/09 Entry Requirements?
16/5/09 The time is near

Markers of life journey

14/7/07 Risk or no risk
9/9/07 Out with sem 1
1/1/08 Welcome 2008
19/7/08 Whats going on
5/9/08 Resettlement
2/4/09 Final performance

Events

18/6/07 St James bond camp day 1
20/6/07 St James bond camp day 2
26/6/07 St James bond camp day 3
13/9/07 Expedition: Kranji
5/2/08 Class outing 4/2
14/3/08 Kota rainforest camp 08
22/3/08 24-7 and good Friday
17/12/08 Camp shout part 1 & 2
22/12/08 Christmas @BV
18/3/09 Adventure camp 09

random notes:

-i realised my handphone has become a big necessity in my life. it is my source of communication, socialising, entertainment and time keeper. i feel so very uneasy going out for a long period without it, like when i left it in the car.

-its nice that ill be making my debut as a jym vocalist on MAD day. its a privilege, yet an added pressure.

Clubbing Experience

2009-05-21T22:17:00.000+08:00

So yesterday night was the very first time in my life i entered a club and participated in the clubbing experience. I know majority of people my age or older have already gone clubbing, but it doesnt matter to me. I had already expected myself beforehand to not enjoy clubbing, but the reasons i went were firstly, for social reasons since my friend wanted to celebrate her birthday by clubbing (weird but thats her choice), and secondly, for the firsthand experience of clubbing.
the trip started off badly with my phone running out of battery on the way, and i had to switch phones with Joel who was also out. i was lucky for that matter. but got me delayed some time.

The place is Butter Factory. a newly opened nightclub, and highly popular. whats more, its ladies night. arriving at around 10.30, the queue startled me at first sight. there were at least 200 people queueing outside, split into 3 queues stretching all the way back. one was the VIP line, which of course cleared fast and not much ppl in that line anyway. then theres the Ladies night line, where all the girls go to, which took quite long to clear too. but the worst was the cover charge line, where the guys have to wait in and takes forever to clear. cause each guy has to settle payment and maybe identification. it took me an exasperating 1 and a half hours standing outside before i finally got into the club. a long and tiring wait, all hot and smoky outside (yes all the smokers were there), legs ached after it all and our patience ran out long before it was over. And at the end of the queue, i had to part with $28 for this experience...

i was really unprepared for the ghastly long queue and the time it takes. i did not bring any entertainment, so the only sources were an occasional sms, and the rest of the time studying the crowd.
Not that i was ever interested, but contary to what the girls were saying that there are many hot guys there, i saw hardly any. almost none. there were however, plenty of attractive females. you see stunningly beautiful ones, those dressed to kill, those with knock-out figures, and also those who overdo things and end up on the negative side. still, this is the place where there is a biggest collection of chio bu, by percentage and in substantial amounts. top-grade ones could be found too.
as mentioned, there were lots of smokers outside. some standing in line and smoking, some at the steps. but i noticed some of the smokers were actually very pretty girls. and i say to myself, what a waste of their life, and what a waste of the attractiveness that God has bestowed them. If only they could transfer it to others who would appreciate it much more, and use it wisely.

Inside the club, the environment was certainly not welcoming nor desirable to me. Music blasting at deafening volumes, you would have to place your mouth beside someone's ear and shout into it before you could be heard. the beats could literally be felt, causing irregular contractions of the heart. the whole place was packed like sardines, becoming very stuffy. as a result, together with alcohol intoxication and dancing, the people were all sweaty and stinking up the place, which was btw, stuffy. sounds bad enough? also, the floor was filthy from spilled beverages, and countless feet trampled it and spread it around, turning it into black liquid all over the floor. the room is all dark, but occasionally a concentrated light beam would flash across, and could well spoil the eyes. outside in the toilets, there is long queue too. you'd see sinks full of vomit, choked, toilet bowls choked too. and of course it stinks.

what the people do there, is basically drink and dance. free flow of drinks until 1am (that leaves not much time for me) in which one would have to stand in long queue again to get a drink. and dancing, just in the open floor but packed with the whole crowd. theres hardly and space to move; you'd be hitting someone in whichever direction. its all about random moves however you like.

From what i see, clubbing solely serves to provide escapism. loud music, alcohol, reckless moving, all works together to drown out all the mind and senses and create a false sense of utopia. And what does this tell about the customer profile? They are probably troubled youths seeking a temporary escape from their life and strife. peel off that cheerful, fun, partying exterior, and most of the time it would reveal a deep insecurity and uncontentment.
Im not stereotyping them all, but to many of those who have clubbing as their hobby. i do feel sad for these people. but no can do. as for me, this activity is certainly not my type, and this experience was indeed an eye-opener for me.

The time is near

2009-05-16T18:30:00.000+08:00

I dont mean to seem like a doomsayer, but we can reasonably forsee - we are indeed approaching the end times, really soon.

1. Mass depletion & advancement
this is probably the most hypothetical factor and separate from the rest, but it plays a part too. look at how the world was just 50 years ago. it was really a totally different world back then. Technology has advanced so tremendously, new innovations beign churned out every minute. For most places too, raised costs and standards of living. Of course, this comes with the cost of mass consumption, which has increased many fold compared to 50 years ago. forests are going, farmlands shrinking, raw materials depleting, especially oil. not to mention the amount of electricity consumed by the highly urbanised environment and all its high-tech stuff. How can this go on for another 50 or 100 years? if R&D is gonna continue at this rate and incorporating technology everywhere and increasingly consume resources, how can the earth support this mass consumption much longer?
it wont be long that the world will be forced into a desperate situation of unsustainability. where will we turn to then...

2. Liberalisation of society
Societies everywhere are becoming increasingly liberal. morals are disappearing fast. What has been deemed immoral and unacceptable a few decades ago is now becoming the norm or even positive practices. look at homosexuality (just see the article on AWARE), premarital sex, abortions, euthanasia, pornography, and murder. the morals and conscience that once forbade these things have gone. Why? cause the society has come to be selfish, arrogant and complacent. They want to think what they want, do what they want, and see things the way they want. whatever pleases them better, whatever can suit their selfish ambitions. which also explains the rise of cults. People want to believe what they want, and hear what their itching ears want to. The world is turning away from God and His ways. And this is the preparation of the ground for the devil to sow his seeds of destruction and sway the world, through the Anitchrist.

3. Globalisation
The world is uniting. seems like a good thing, and everyone likes it. but this is also a sign pointing towards the end times, when the Antichrist would be able to unite the whole world under one banner and rule it with an iron fist, set the times, change its laws and have the world bend their knee to him. As already can be seen, the world is moving slowly achieveing a common universal language, which of course is English. Remember the event of the tower of Babel? something like that may happen again. the world is just as rebellious if not more, than they were back then.

4. Cashless society
Singapore plans that within another 5 years or so, Singapore will become a cashless society. that aint very far. the use of cash would be eliminated, all transactions would be conducted via things like NETS, ez-link and so on. who knows what the new ones coming up would be called. Already in countries like Thailand and South Korea, they are implementing biometric codes, personalised per individual, that they can use to make purchases. soon it wont be a choice of convenience, but the only medium of transaction. Doesnt all this ring a bell? - In the end times, the Antichrist would force everyone from every nation to receive the mark of the beast in order to conduct transactions. sounds like biometrics to me.

Disclaimer, that though these signs are coming to be fulfilled soon, doesnt mean that once they are fulfilled, the end times would come. the bible states that the Lord would come again when we least expect it. perhaps when the signs are fulfilled but nothing happens, and the world condemns the prophecies as fake and become complacent, then suddenly it strikes and catches the world with their pants down.
so regardless of whether the signs are eniment or not, we should always be working to prepare our hearts for the day of Judgment. the signs are merely to act as a push for some to feel the urgency.

-random 6/5

2009-05-06T00:02:00.000+08:00

So, the most talk of the town around now is the flu. whatever kind of flu, its getting on us now. perhaps due to the unusually hot temperatures too, but it seems everyone is falling sick or showing flu symptoms.. including me. for me its been a real bad runny nose the whole day, and cant seem to get to to stay still. and just at the right time, theres all this frantic measures going on in my school (dunno about other schools around) where we are all forced to bring our thermometers and conduct temp checks twice a day, and report it to the school by sms... and its such a hassle that more than 70% didnt bother. haha.

last night, i was sitting on the sofa watching tv, and didnt realise anything until i looked at my thigh, and saw a big fat mosquito sucking at it! This was one mutated mosquito, with an extra huge sucking tube its at least 5 times thicker than normal ones. so it probably sucked so much blood that some excess was oozing out from its behind! i waited no longer and slammed it, creating a patch of blood on my leg. then i studied the mosquito. what other proof do i have that its tube was huge? - it left a visible puncture on the spot it bit. could it be that which causes my flu, i wonder.

and interestingly, at a time like this, last night i actually dreamt of - a pig. yes i dreamt i was sitting on a low hospital bed (lousy hospital without aircon), there were many other beds in the same room but all empty. then this big pig looking friendly and domesticated, even wearing some kind of clothing, came walking down the isle toward me. it came to me, sniffed at me, and i patted it. it was like a dog! but still, its a bit disturbing that it was a big pig and not a dog.

Enough of flu talk, i have just invented and made my own home-made Vodka Coffee! and i saw (or tasted) that it is good. of course it aint so simple as putting vodka in coffee. its just once a while that this .. creative flair suddenly strikes. and only once a while am i able to respond to it. and even then theres only such chance that my idea in mind would actually turn out well. but whatever it may be, i would always deduce and learn something.

FB holdem poker. Not long ago i was at $1million. and within 4 days it was all gone. happens with the combination of playing big + really bad luck. it was a massive wave of bad luck like never seen before, with continuous loss all the way. at most an occasional small win. didnt take long at all before it was all gone. I would say, it is God's hand in it. after all, i did pray that i wont get addicted to it. so thats the best way, i guess? =)

Continuation in french II has been great, i would expect to gain much more from this than i did in French I. having lessons twice a week instead of once keeps me more regularly in tuned. for those who took french I last semester, only about half made it through to 'qualify' for french II. and out of these half, maybe only a third chose to continue in french II. so from 3 classes of 20+, there are only 11 students in French II. so this means, everyone in the class has a considerable standard, which saves time waiting for the less inclined students to catch up previously. plus because of the small class size, we are each given more attention and opportunity. yes indeed i do see myself gaining much more here than from french I.

its week 3 of school and there is still no pressure. nor do i see much coming soon. as i have seen from the number of credits, it is already expected to be the slackest semester. and i guess it is living up to expectations. no excuse to feel shagged out from the work now... but i like that.

Harding: the new place to be

2009-05-04T00:26:00.000+08:00

The time has come for the church to move as well. away we go, goodbye leedon road. the church building i have been familiar with since my kindergarten days, when it was still a kindergarten. for some time, it had been like my second home.

now it seems every place that i have regular associated with has now been removed or converted to something else. which leaves me with little tangible reminders of my past. esp my childhood. my kindergarten is gone (long ago), my primary school building has been converted into a kindergarten (just after i graduated!), my sec school has been converted into a language centre (just after i graduated, again!), my home which i spent my first 18 years of my life in has since been demolished, and now, even my church is gonna be gone too. i guess this is no time to get sentimental.

i expected myself to be rather sentimental and emo on the last sunday in st james, but it went rather normal. and when i had my first service in harding, i didnt feel out of place or unfamiliar, and neither did i feel i miss the old church. maybe i would some time later, but not much. cause i realised, its the people that matters more. after all, its the people that make the church.

for now, we still do go back to church at mornings for dg, so we would get too see the church and spend time in it for at least 2 months more. many things are still left in there, and all facilities functioning. then we go down to harding for the E3 service, then in the afternoon head over to St Georges for jym. so my 3 main activites on a typical sunday is now each held at different locations, which makes it all the more interesting.

About the new places, i quite like it. a refreshing change. lots of nature around, a serene environment and like a countryside setting not commonly found in singapore. whats bad though is the narrow passageways where we always collide with human traffic, children's toilets, lack of proper facilities and location matters, having no convenient lunch place nearby like holland V was. theres only those expensive restaurants which is not an option for us. the chapel at St Georges for jym is no doubt older looking and lousier than our own, but everything we need is there nevertheless. the container rooms are kinda cool.

on the whole, things are still better back at leedon. i wouldnt mind not moving. but its ok, moving out to a lousier place for just 2 years, and after that we'll be back and much better than what it is now! may this 2 years at harding be memorable ones.

Creatures of the wild

2009-04-20T19:50:00.000+08:00

Living next to the bukit timah nature reserve has sure provided a nice view and sense of peace. but it has also brought along stray wild creatures wandering into my home. of course the land animals are kept out of safe reach, but theres no stopping the creatures of the air.

1. last night, my home was invaded with a massive swarm of flies. actually more like bugs with wings. they were attracted to the bright lights here, and first began hovering around my dining table lamp. started with a few, and within minutes many more came and turned into the flyer flurry as seen in the picture.
then, despite my advice not to, my dad switched off all the lights. the next thing we knew, the flies were all flying aimlessly, into our food, bags and clothes. was not a good feeling of bugs in ur shirt. after that they landed all over the sofa. then they shed off their wings, crawled around and died soon after, leaving the whole place full of dead bug bodies and wings.

something funny too.
dad: i tell u what. ill turn on the toilet lights and turn off the living room lights.
me: for what?!
dad: make them go there la. better that they go there, isnt it?
me: oh, so just because u dont use that toilet, then u dun care about it huh...
dad: whats wrong? just flush them down the toilet bowl can already what...
me: hello, the lights are not in the toilet bowl!!

2. some time back, my home was invaded by these wasps. or bees. seems like a cross between both. they are huge and had stings. and they were trying to build nests near the lights. would sure be bad if that happens. fortunately, they were quite blur and did not dodge newspaper. so i whacked them all down and gathered them up.

3. this giant bird was sighted perched on the railings outside the window of my neighbour directly opposite the window of my room. it was the top storey, and i dont know why the bird chose to go so high. plus, it began pecking at the window glass and trying to pry into the sides of it, like it really wanted to go in. i wonder why it didnt go to some other window that was open and exposing food instead. it stayed there for about half an hour before flying back to the nature reserve. interesting. i have never seen such a bird before, nor such bird behaviours.

4. from my room window, i also witnessed 2 mynahs looking for a place to build their nest. they finally found their choice place by crawling through a tiny opening in my neighbour's window. (seems like a toilet window.) so over a few days they made many rounds carrying twigs in their beak, crawling under the window and then crawling out again. but they have since stopped - my neighbour must have found out and destroyed the nest.

Update 18/4

2009-04-18T16:16:00.000+08:00

it has come to the end of the holidays, a good 7 weeks but which didnt seem very long. time flied really fast, and now that i know it, im into my last weekend. what have i done meanhwile? sad to say, nothing much. i had envisioned this holiday to be so much more activity-filled than it turned out to be. and that venture with venture era was kind of a flop. hope what i learnt there has indeed built me up, somehow.

looking forward, its come to the last semester! the last academic semester, that is. there would be abit of study during internship after that, but majority is just practical work. counting the credits and the hours spent in school, it is the least for this semester, compared to all of year 1 and 2! ironic huh.. year 3, the advanced level and supposedly most hectic year, is the slackest of all. although it may be abit too early to say... the projects may turn out to be rather demanding and taking up all the extra time we are given. i kinda dread it, now that i discover that 2 of my tutors would be keeping close watch on me and being extra critical, following the unfortunate incident not long ago. i have to stay good, for my internship is at stake!

i just got my new phone. finally. my mom, dad and brother had already gotten their new phones, and meanwhile i am stuck with the very old phone which has served me faithfully for about 2 years despite being dropped, wet and scratched countless times. simple phones are the most hardy. before that it was used by my mom for some time, so this new phone would be my first brand new phone given to me. very modern design, the gadgets are good. all functions there and more, 5 megapix camera. but i still dont quite like it. simply because im not used to the touch buttons and the way it works in general. being a different brand from all the nokia phones ive been using, this would certainly take some getting used to. maybe i would come to like it after some time. but for now, no.

i dont know if its global warming or some fires in indonesia or what, but the weather these few days have been extremely terribly hot. causes me to sweat - the sticky kind - the whole day, even when i stay indoors. even at night when its supposedly cool and windy, theres no escaping the heat. i open the windows and hot wind rushes in. i tried ignoring it and went to sleep without aircon one night, trusting that it would be fine once i go to sleep, but only to wake up in the middle of the night, burning. even with my above-average resistance to temperature, both hot and cold (or so i think), this proves intolerable to me. maybe we should aircon the whole house.

Gabrielle Lee Ker Ting (as she requested her name to be put up) made a rather... cute statement today.
"Its not my fault that i suck at math. its my brain's fault. if i pay attention, i can definitely score better. but i cant be bothered."

can score better by paying attention = brain is alright.
cant be bothered = your fault.
she simply made two stands, and immediately gave contradictory explainations to both of them! lol. its funny how some people try to justify themselves.

random reflections

2009-04-07T01:39:00.000+08:00

today at the beach pavilion, there were these 2 cute and nice looking pigeons that kept walking in circles around us waiting for food, and occasionally went to other parts of the pavilion. the same kind which built a nest upon my aircon compressor cables in the past. later when i went to feed them, there were 2 mynahs hanging around them too. so i threw a potato chip near them, and a mynah quickly rushed to get it. i threw another a distance from all, a pigeon saw it first and slowly paced towards it, but the mynah again rushed past it and got the chip. but i didnt want the ugly mynahs to get the food. i wanted to feed the cute pigeons. so i threw a chip nearest to a pigeon, and this time it got to the chip first, but even then, the mynahs came and snatched the chip away, and the pigeon just backed off like it was scared, despite being bigger than the mynahs. so whenever a chip is left on the floor, the mynahs would always get it.

i found this rather interesting cause the pigeons were bigger and perhaps stronger. But it was just not in their nature to compete and fight with others, but instead to be gentle, graceful and merciful. though they may be stepped upon by the mynahs and lose some food, i see the desirable qualities in the pigeons and they win my admiration instead. then perhaps when i see pigeons next time, i would feed them, but not the mynahs. i think we can have something to learn from the pigeons, applied in human lives.

how would you feel if God were to use you as a tool to tell your good friend that a particular choice he made isnt the right one, by making you fail to do something that your friend entrusted you with which was important to his goal?
And whats worse, when looking at why it failed, it was all my fault. although unintentional. it really seems that God caused me to be that way. what other purpose could there be, but to prevent that plan from going through.... but why couldnt God do it Himself? why must i be made the scapegoat..?
well but if in the end we see for ourselves that that plan was not the right one for him after all, then i would be glad that i was used as an instrument of God's plan and 'rescue' from his own..

Final Performance

2009-04-02T22:08:00.000+08:00

Today, it was finally time for the final performance for the vocalists, as part of the vocalist course and a form of assessment, as well as to showcase for friends and family to see. though we practiced our songs many times before, this time was especially nerve-wrecking cause its a live performance in front of many ppl we know. parents; the greatest contributor to the stress.

so there was i, waiting for my turn to arrive. and i was the 7th singer. one by one they took the stage. i could see some were nervous. some made blunders and it kinda wrecked them. that so didnt help me. and throughout the time i had reoccuring bouts of nervousness... prolonged over the wait. if it were to continue when i took the stage, it would sure affect me lots.

and just like there are the annoying suspense-creating commercial breaks during Singapore idol or its kind, so there was the food break after half the vocalists had sung. arrrgh... all the psyching for nothing; it really broke the momentum. and i couldnt eat those nice food in case any of it were to interfere.

When it was finally my turn, i went up and wasnt so nervous thankfully, but that didnt prevent me from making a big blunder at the very first line. i mixed up part of the first verse with that from the second verse! threw me into panic, causing me to go shaky for awhile. but God brought me comfort and i was able to surpress it, and quickly find a solution. i simply swapped the first and second verse except for the parts where the tune was different. sounds alright, but if anyone bothered to pay attention to the lyrics, it was a big blunder. still, i managed to hide it and make it seem to be all fine. thats the advantage of singing an unfamiliar song!
the rest of the song, the hard parts later, i managed to get it all. what a relief!

after the performaces, i thought i would get some pokes on that blunder i made. but it really occurs to me, nobody even noticed! they just told me i did a good job, and nobody talked about the mistake! and so i partially forgot about it too, and didnt bring it up to any of them. got away with it.. whew!

Thanks be to God, for giving me this opportunity of a vocalist course which really trained and grew me in this area, and for really helping me through during the whole performance. Through this i have grown closer to music, to God, and my fellow vocalists. Like never before, i felt a sense of pride for each of us who went up to perform. yes, this course was a great idea.

And i noticed a certain interesting trend among the 10 vocalists in the course - each of the Jym cell groups are represented!
Oak - Kenneth & Elza
cedar - Sabrina
poplar - Clement
myrtle - Joanne
willow - Eunice
Acacia - ME
cypress - Charlene
sycamore - Joshua
juniper - Sien

After the performaces, Elza's dad commended me on my performace, and then asked "how old are you... sec 3 now arh?"
when i said no, he continued "sec 2??"
i gave him that shocked expression and motioned upwards with my finger, signalling him to go higher. but he misinterpreted it ..
"oh... sec one." =.='
so i had to quickly correct him and stuff.

funny how ppl always misunderestimate my age... even up to 6 years below the actual!
well sometimes looking young is to my advantage. it allows me to relate to the younger ones and relive my younger times, without feeling too out of place. and same time i can also relate with those my age cos of my true age.. wonderful ability, come to think of it. hopefully when i am really old, i would still look young as well!

Update 30/3

2009-03-30T02:18:00.000+08:00

So, today we had the quarterly jym break (or is it quarterly..?) and Acacia clinches 3rd again. the rankings are very similar to the previous time. shows how ppl never change. haha.

Cell outing was really too short. we barely had time to settle down nicely, play a bit of guitar hero, table soccer and monopoly, before half the group had to go. our monopoly wasnt even halfway through! but i was owning so everyone else decided to quit. leavers.

since there was no point staying when so few ppl remain (from Acacia, that is. myrtle all stayed on longer) and i was also offered a lift back on the condition i left immediately, so thats end of Acacia outing for me. we could have done so much more if there was time.

But today was a special day. where i actually had 2 cell outings. whats more, with a cell im not in. so happens the situations provided well for me to join in the Oak outing. and since its not the first time joining them, it wasnt too hard too fit in. so i joined them today for almost as long as i was with my own cell. great, triple cell fellowshipping.

-------------------------------------------------

Though my recent journey has been great, and i have seen how God tested, provided and delivered me, i still do feel wary and afraid. a few warning signs are arising, though not so clear yet. i have a feeling that my next round of trials will be beginning, anytime soon. i really dont want to. i dont feel ready to let go. But bracing myself, gathering my defenses, i hope to be strengthened once again.

-------------------------------------------------

My involvement in Venture Era aint bringing me much result. even though i have made that commitment to God, involving a significant sacrifice. i dont think im headed the wrong way now. but i see my peers having things so much easier. maybe God is saying 'wait'. but i cant be sure if He is actually saying 'No'. or maybe im just expecting too much. Confused and uncertain, i press on. im still waiting...

Francais

2009-03-23T13:26:00.000+08:00

Alors, after my french course ended, i intended to continue in Alliance Francaise. (cause my textbook was still less then half covered by the end of it...) i checked with them and yes it was possible. but my course mates who i asked along have yet to decide if they wanna continue in AF, and while waiting for them, i forgot all about it. also reluctant due to whatever complications that may have.

and then yesterday i received a letter from my school's language dept which invited me to continue in French II next semester... problem of uncertainty solved! i knew of french II, but thought i couldnt go for it cos it lasted a whole year long, which i dont have. but to my surprise, French II is now changed to twice a week, allowing me to finish it within one semester. timing of the classes are quite suitable too. problem of timing solved!
Thanks be to God for this opportunity.

one good thing about french is that it has quite alot of similar vocab to english, so alot of new words can be guessed. just for fun, i came up with a list of the misleading exceptions i know of...

but thinking carefully, most of them can actually be argued to have some relation between the suggested and real meaning. see it? haha.

Adventure camp 09

2009-03-18T21:27:00.000+08:00

So its back from adventure camp. well certainly this was a very unique camp by the fact that it is held in a public area, accommodation in tents, and whats more, by the sea! even scouts camps dont do that. they make us pitch tents in some sickening terrain surrounded by jungles. i think this tents thing is a fresh new setting for an adventure camp. and we seem to get along with it pretty well. one thing though, why didnt we have outdoor cooking? (bbq not counted.)

overall i would say it was a fun camp. even though i missed the whole day 1 activities cos i only arrived there at 11+ due to stupid wine course exam. but after hearing how the kayaking went so bad, i was glad i didnt go. afterall, i save $8 on rentals. and before that i only missed tent pitching which i done before.

but i wished i could have gone for the night cycling. it went all well except for a few small injuries. would have been nice to feel the night sea breeze while cycling along the coast. still, after they came back from night cycling, people took a long time to wash up and have supper and stuff, so most only went to sleep at around 3am. which was my sleeping time for both nights.

during this camp, i felt there was a lot of delays between the activities. or maybe also known as free time. a bit too generous with it, so make up for those slower ones. could get rather boring, but fortunately the beach provided a good few hours of free-time killing. surprising how anyone of any age can find entertainment and leisure by the beach. stone skipping, sand structure construction, sand ball making, playing in the sand and in the waters, or simply sitting around and watch the beauty of nature. what could we have done without the beach... just sometimes groups would gather in the pavillion to play some lame social games. im not so much into them.

day 2 beach games, lasted too short due to taking too long in the morning to get ready. it was just a miserable total 3 rounds of captains ball lasting 10mins each. playing area is small too, and the goal lines keep getting distorted. over too fast.

made our way to high elements by 1.30. somehow felt i been there before, vaguely. there was a lot of waiting time; waiting for instructions and briefings, then waiting for each other to have their turns at rock wall, vertical obstacle course, broken bridge and the vine. a few helped to belay. the rest just sat around and get bored, meanwhile getting baked in the sun and not being able to properly watch our fellows sweat it out because of the glare. there really should be a bigger place with more facilities to accommodate a group of this size.
i first did the vertical obstacle course (or how i know it), my partner gave up at level 3. i then had to climb up the remaining 3 levels on my own. was stuck and almost fell at the last level, but managed to push myself up. then for the rock climbing, a bad start caused me to become more wary and cautious, which could have been detrimental to my performance. i realise the trick is to do it quickly so i dont get so tired hanging on. the broken bridge seemed scary at first, but once i started walking across it was so easy. fear and caution is the only thing that would slow downa nd hinder someone across that bridge. once again my partner made slow progress across the bridge, and i was on the other end while he was stepping on. wanted to go back, but didnt in case i made the bridge more unstable. it was a teachable moment on the importance of confidence. ran out of time and didnt get to try the vine. but everyone made it across that one.

day 2 dinner was bbq. just standard bbq items like chicken wing, sausage, satay. plus sotong, prawn and fish cake. then later on the unpopular stuff like corn and tapioca. all bbqed on on small grill, so food flow was slow. we were unsatisfied with the amount food we got, but by the time more was ready, out stomachs made us feel full already. so a large container of leftover food became the forefeit for games played later in the night.

at night, there was supposed to be the campfire session, but there was no fire. so it became instead a 'whose line isit anyway' session. we all sat on the big white canvas which became all wet and sandy with foot juice. still, the girls would be using it to sleep on later. it was an entertaining time but it somehow lacked structure.

after that the rest of the night was free n easy. as usual many didnt wanna sleep so early on last night of camp. so we stayed up and played several rounds of mafia (aka murderer)...began to like the game more. (i dont like the version with the healer though.) and when people started leaving, then we stopped and decided to sleep.

now my tent was wet and flooded from a mishap with the morning rain. it also became very sandy inside. was sickening and i decided to sleep outdoors instead. i camped onto a bench by the beach. but soon a heard the strong wind coming from the sea and went past the camp, followed by drizzle. i knew then i had no choice but to get back into the gross tent and sleep there. so yes, i had to sleep over sand and my legs in a puddle of water. but i realise that was the best place to be then. the rain came and grew into a really great storm. extremely heavy rain and very strong winds. the tent felt like it was gonna be blown off. could hear the fierce raindrops all over the tent, but it was all safe inside. poor people at the pavillion, they had a hard night.

i managed to fall asleep, and wake up to watch the sunrise. witnessed the orange sun rising up from the sea horizon. from then on, we just spend the day getting ready, freshen up, devotions, pack up the place and ready to go home by 12. nothing much on day 3, nor day 1. so i actually all i needed to go for was day 2. which i did. so i do not feel sad on missing day 1. it was a fun, easy and inspiring adventure camp. pros and cons present. perhaps taking these into consideration, next year's could be made much better.

Update 10/3

2009-03-08T23:54:00.000+08:00

So, there has not been very good response from the questions posted on my previous post... which could only come from 3 things:
- nobody dares to give an answer
- nobody bothers to think about it and comment
- hardly anyone reads this blog.
well i do hope its the first and not the third.

well its holiday time now apparently. break away from all the projects and studies. i was pretty free during the first few days after my freedom, and i guessed i much wasted it away. but now it has been filled with activity so much that holiday isnt like holiday, in the sense that there aint much time for my own free activities at home, like learning on pipsology. havent even done 2 chapters.

i would say its a good thing to be always kept busy, provided im doing constuctive things. i guess most of them are... its packed nearly full this whole week, and then next week theres gonna be camp. but after that the plans are thin. thats the time i might go back to being bored.

I was praying that i would spend my time wisely, and also to find a job. well about spending time wisely thats yet to say. but instead a job found me. yeah they actually call up students from the contacts i dunno how they obtained, and ask them to join. im uncertain on how this career would go and how truly attractive it is. but im giving it a try for the sake of learning, even if i dont get to earn much after all. i dont see myself being very involved in this.

i have been trying out once again on Dota AI. still using the quite outdated 6.43AI. and lately i have now succeeded in winning against 5 insanes using several heroes that had failed a few times before or i had perceived impossible. then somehow now it turns out quite easy...
these include:
- enigma
- goblin techies
- tinker
- phantom lancer
- spirit breaker
- crystal maiden
- silencer
- dark seer

for most of them, the secret lies within 1 or 2 certain crucial items. commonly, its bloodstone. i realised, its quite imbal using against 5 AIs. well, i shall continue trying again on those outcasted heroes.. when i have time.

i have experienced how problems and tough times in life had been a great learning experience for me and how it made me grow stronger. now i can see that God is gradually taking me out of my trials and replacing them with blessings. And so one night as i was reflecting on my blessings, out of a moment of zeal i prayed that God would put me through the next series of trails so i could learn and grow even more. and the very next moment, i regretted praying for that.
so i anxiously prayed to take back that request, because i cant bear to part with my long-awaited blessings. yet. but when is the right time to come out of my comfort zone again? or will i never come out by having this mentality...